Update & Baby shower question

[skibunny8503]

So just wanted to update you guys on everything since I haven’t been on here as much lately. 

Bunny Update:
They are all pretty much shedding their coats right now.  Archie looks a mess and is allergic to himself (he sneezes a lot more when he sheds haha!).  Gracie is now starting on her shots to help with her peeing issue which seems to help but she might have to get 2 shots a week (she’s only had one at home).  I am going to attempt to give her a shot tomorrow; my step-mother-in-law (who used to work for a vet) knows how to do shots and did it last week and will supervise tomorrow.  Wish me luck!  She does really well with the bandages we bought her from Tractor Supply (thank you so much whoever suggested those!).  They’re by 3m and they are for horses and it sticks to itself.  They help her feet slowly heal.  So Gracie is doing ok for her age at this point.

Me Update:
I am out of my first trimester (thank God!  That was pretty cruddy) and I am 15 weeks pregnant (yay!).  My next appt. is on Thursday and it’s a little scary since it’ll be a blood test for Downs and other stuff.  But the next appt. we’ll have another ultrasound which I cannot wait!  We might find out what it is too.  But I’m not sure if we’ll tell anyone else, it seems like everyone wants to know everything and we might keep the gender to ourselves to have something private between just the two of us.  Would that be totally wrong ?

Started to show just a bit but if I hear one more person say something about “are you even pregnant?!” I might scream…especially if they’ve already had kids and have gone threw it before.  Family is stressing me out a bit and am trying my best to just shrug stuff off.  I just started looking at places to have a baby shower (just to get an idea; it won’t be until Nov. though).  My mom insists I cannot throw my own baby shower and can’t choose a facility.  No one (besides his dad) has come up to me to say they’ll throw me one.  I mean money is tight nowadays anyways and I don’t have much family that’s close to me.  So my question to you is; do you think it’s ok to throw your own shower?  And do you guys have any game or center piece ideas?  I’d love to hear your input and ideas!

[Michelle&Lolli]

Glad things are going well! People just make dumb comments about EVERYTHING. lol Not a mother myself, but from what I’ve read on here and heard from family is that when it comes to YOUR children, you must always do as you see fit. So if you wanna find out the sex but not tell anyone….go for it! And heck, might as well throw yourself a baby shower too. But at least wait and see if anyone else steps up. And it’s customary to have the shower about a month or so before the due date, so you might have to wait and see for a while yet.

[skibunny8503]

Adequin….that’s the shot Gracie’s getting…I completely forgot what it was. Just wanted to post the name if anyone didn’t know.

Oh yes, I’ve had people say some weird stuff to me. My sister-in-law insists I’m lying because I’m not showing yet (well starting to but no one can really tell) and she has 3 kids haha! I’m due in January so we’re (or whoever) is planning it in Nov. Because if you do it in Dec. then you have people strapped for cash around X-mas and then it’s snowing. So Nov. sounded pretty good. My mom’s due date was Jan. 17th (I’m Jan. 18th) and I can luckily follow everything that happened to her that she had written down and she had her shower in Nov. too.

[LoveChaCha]

I’ve known of people throwing their own showers. I think that John’s sister threw her own, made her own invitations and such, lol.

you are only 15 weeks pregnant!! o_O Not several months! BOO to those people! Each pregnancy is different and each woman has a different body

[Michelle&Lolli]

Don’t believe you?! You better not gain a bunch of weight. LOL That was meant as a joke. But I cringe to think what these people will say once you do start showing. Here’s an idea – when some moron says something stupid, picture yourself with your hands over your ears and yelling lalalalalalalalalala!! I almost told you keep some liquor around but you can’t do that.

My cousin didn’t start showing until her 5th or 6th month, I think. SHE could tell because her clothes were fitting tighter, but to look at her, you might’ve just thought she had gained a few pounds. I can’t phrase things right in person or online. lol Like…..you could tell something was different and the only thing you noticed was maybe her body looked a bit softer and her face fuller. Does that make sense at all?

[LBJ10]

Proper etiquette dictates that neither you nor your mother can throw a shower for you. This goes for both weddings and babies. It comes across as you demanding gifts from people. I had to read up on all this stuff for my wedding. o_O Then my flake of a maid of honor failed to plan a shower for me. People were asking when my shower was going to be. So I finally ended up setting everything up myself and then letting my maid of honor take the credit. But you know what? When I look back on it now, I wish I would have formally hosted my own shower. My maid of honor was a flake and we stopped being friends not long after my wedding. So if no one else steps up to throw you a shower, then I say go for it. There’s no reason you should miss out on stuff because other people don’t have brains enough to take the initiative. I’m think that this is what would happen if my husband and I ever decided to have kids. I don’t have any friends anymore and I don’t feel I can count on my family.
As for keeping the sex a secret, I don’t think I would want to. I would want everything I needed ahead of time and not have everything be gender-neutral. There are only so many yellow outfits with ducks out there. But if that doesn’t bother you and you want to have a special secret, then go for it. It’s your life and your baby, so you shouldn’t let your family pressure you into anything.

[Michelle&Lolli]

As for keeping the sex a secret, I don’t think I would want to. I would want everything I needed ahead of time and not have everything be gender-neutral. There are only so many yellow outfits with ducks out there. But if that doesn’t bother you and you want to have a special secret, then go for it. It’s your life and your baby, so you shouldn’t let your family pressure you into anything.

Or to throw another option out there……since you have a while yet, you could keep it to yourselves for, say, until September or October. That way it would be something special between you two for a while, but you could be more specific on what you want/need for your shower when you announce it to everyone. OOOOOOOO….I think it would be cool/cute to announce on the shower invitations! lol

[Michelle&Lolli]

I know when my aunts threw my cousin her baby shower, they went and bought some children’s books and smaller baby toys to use as the center pieces. So my cousin got a jump start on the books and rattle-type toys at least. You could always go with a few carnations or other cheaper flowers in little vases.

If you google for baby shower games, there should be some good ones out there. I can’t remember what we played.

[Lis]

I planned a co-ed baby shower for my best friend’s wife that we held last Jan. (I’m Maddy’s Godmother now – speaking of which she just turned 6 months yesterday!).

We played a couple games. Guess the amount of candy in the baby bottles, guess what mom wants the baby to look like, and the baby animal game (given certain animals, you have to name the word for baby – not a single person at this party got rabbit right. I was disappointed!).

For prizes, I picked up cheap (but safe) baby bottles at Walmart. Then I filled them with various candies. Everyone who won asked me for a plastic baggie to put the candy in, then handed Celeste and Joe the bottles. I also picked up inexpensive candles that smelled pretty.

For centerpieces – well, we didn’t have any! But since I’ve been drooling over cute things for my wedding, I’ll throw this idea your way: http://www.lilblueboo.com/2011/07/glow-stick-lanterns.html

[Beka27]

It’s a good idea to register for gender-neutral stuff anyways, because chances are, you’ll decide to have a second child. Another option is to announce the sex at the shower. Maybe make a game out of it, have people choose what they think it is and someone tallies it up. Or tell one person and have them get a gender-specific gift… and save that for the last present you open. This is another idea I’ve heard of people doing, but then you and hubby wouldn’t know either… Getting the results in a letter from your doctor, sealed up… to be opened WITH your friends and family at the shower. Have someone else open and read it aloud.

It is traditional that neither your mom nor you throw the shower, but nowadays tradition tends to go out the window with most things. Do you have a friend or family member who is very good with party planning? The truth is, some people… kinda suck at planning parties. So if you know someone who has done a good job before for other people, I might talk to them about what you want, and maybe have them work with a couple other people that you might be closer to. If you want to be involved I would tell them that too. I would recommend the shower be as early as possible in November… As it gets later, Thanksgiving comes up and then people get too preoccupied. Looks like the 6th is the first Sunday in November. Also keep in mind that the baby could come in December…

[Beka27]

Posted By Michelle&Lolli on 07/28/2011 09:57 PM
I know when my aunts threw my cousin her baby shower, they went and bought some children’s books and smaller baby toys to use as the center pieces. So my cousin got a jump start on the books and rattle-type toys at least. You could always go with a few carnations or other cheaper flowers in little vases.

If you google for baby shower games, there should be some good ones out there. I can’t remember what we played.

Or some people request children’s books with a warm inscription inside in lieu of a traditional card.  And it’s not unheard of for dads to have “Diaper Parties” now too…  

[Lani]

I agree that if you want to throw your own shower then go for it! Traditions are great if you’re into that, but it’s so much more acceptable to make your own rules these days, so why not? Same with keeping the sex to yourself. It is your baby which means you’re the one that gets to make the decisions. Plus as Beka27 said, you could announce the sex at the shower. I’ve been to showers where the cake is colored either pink or blue and then frosted with vanilla or chocolate frosting so you cant see the color. So then when you go to cut the cake, it’s like a big surprise to everyone to see what color the cake is and what the sex is!

[Monkeybun]

I like the idea of either announcing it at the shower, or having the doc seal the results to be opened at the shower

Also, tradition – bah. Do things hte way you want to do things! If that means having someone else throw it, or you throw it, go with whatever makes you happy. Don’t worry about what anyone else thinks. It’s your baby after all

[Kate Monster]

As far as telling people if you’re having a boy or a girl, if you really feel like you don’t want to you shouldn’t feel obligated to do so. From a pragmatic perspective of course, if you care about the clothes you get for the baby one way or the other that’s something to consider. Personally I wouldn’t want to tell people just because I wouldn’t want all the gender specific stuff, especially if it was a little girl. I wouldn’t want my daughter to be a pretty pink princess type by default, she could choose to get all into that on her own, but I wouldn’t want my friends and family indoctrinating her into it before she’s old enough to care. Lol, I say that as a girl who was a total tom boy and had a grandma who kept buying me barbies and princess stuff because she didn’t think I was appropriately girly so it’s a sore spot. A little boy I feel like it’s less over the top and absurd, there’s not really a commercially created cult around blue. But that’s all a matter of choice, if you would want all the pink or all the blue stuff, then tell people, if you’d prefer that people not do that, then don’t tell them. And if you really, really just don’t want to tell and don’t care one way or the other about the color of clothing you get, then I wouldn’t tell people.

[LBJ10]

What I find sad is that it’s only the little “boy” clothes that have the cute animals on them. Yes, there will be a pink kitty or pony here and there. But I like the monkeys, elephants, giraffes, bears, zebras, etc.

[Beka27]

Colored frosting in the cake sounds so cute Lani!!!! I’ve never heard of that! What a neat way to share the good news!

[skibunny8503]

Usually my appts. are 4 weeks apart so my next one is this Thursday and so the ultrasound would be done around the last week of Aug/ first week of Sept probably.  How acurate are ultrasounds now for the gender?  I think I’m afraid of telling everyone “oh it’s a girl” and it end up being a boy or vis versa.  I guess I’ll have to ask the ultrasound person what they think (unless the baby crosses it’s legs for us..that would so be our luck too!).  Like Beka said, I’d rather have all neutral stuff at the shower anyways in case it turns out not to be the right gender and also if we decide to have another one (like 5 years down the road) then I’ll have everything already. 

Beka, I asked my step-sister-in-law to help me out with the shower (which she was excited to help) and I think we’ll have my step-mother-in-law, my mom and my grandma’s name on the invite for host or something like that.  I know my father-in-law wants my sister-in-law to help out but I’m just not close with her (I hardly talk to her), she works and has 3 kids and she never asked anyways.  My Step-M-I-L said she’s good at making centerpieces so she can help me figure out ideas for that and said that her daughter loves planning parties.

Beka, you mentioned the 6th which we were thinking about but I saw it’s daylight saving time ends…do you think people would forget and late then?  Or maybe put a reminder on the invite haha!

I really like the idea of having the cake colored on the inside to be a big reveil!  I don’t think I could keep the envelop sealed if we waited until Nov though haha!  But I told my husband about the cake thing and he seemed to like it, so maybe we’ll do that!    I don’t know if my mom would agree with that (she thinks it should be a surprised but to each their own), we just won’t tell her we’re doing that hehe!

Oh Lis, I really like the candy in the bottle game idea!!!  I think I’m going to use that!  That’s a cute idea having books instead of cards!

 

Thanks for all the ideas guys!  If you think of anymore keep them coming   I better go back to painting the baby’s room (don’t worry, I got a mask on so no smells)

[LBJ10]

Ultrasound is not always 100% for telling the gender. Although sometimes it is EXTREMELY obvious, if you know what I mean. But sometimes it will be less obvious. I think the most common scenario is they think it’s a girl because they can’t see anything and then it ends up being a boy. Were you having an amnio though? You said something about testing for Down Syndrome. If you are doing an amnio, then they can determine the gender through genetics. There would be no mistake there.

[skibunny8503]

No amino, just a regular blood test for Downs, Neural Tube and some other stuff. It just gives you a % of risk your baby might have it. My husband really wants me to get it, but I wasn’t too crazy about getting it done. Hopefully nothing shows up, I just don’t want to have to worry about anything.

[LBJ10]

I see. But that is still a good thing. If something does show up, then they can do more tests to make sure nothing is wrong. I wouldn’t worry though, stuff like that isn’t all that common. Anyway, I guess when you go to find out the sex of the baby, ask the tech how experienced they are in recognizing things. If they are well trained, then there is a higher level of certainty.

[skibunny8503]

That’s true. I found a game idea on a site that was like the Price is Right and you put a bunch of baby items out and people have to try to guess how much they were purchased for. I thought it sounded kind of cute. I don’t like games like pin the diaper on the baby or guess how big mommy’s tummy is. I think I wouldn’t want people to know how “fat” I am haha! One odd one was melted chocolate in a diaper…I thought that was gross. I want to talk about that stuff with my mom to start getting some ideas but the last time I mentioned venues she’s like “I thought we weren’t talking about that yet” :-/ Oh well.

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