At the end of the day, this is a very personal decision that you should decide on, based on your personal observations and beliefs. I’m sorry you were left to cope on your own, so I hope we’ll be able to provide some different perspectives to make you feel more assured with whichever path you choose for Pinky. Below are the thoughts that went through my head while reading your post.
In terms of hay eating— does she still consume it in a healthy quantity? If so, and she’s stopped eating her greens but will take pellets, not eating greens is not too major of a crisis. If she’s not eating pellets or hay and has only been eating greens, then thinking about other ways to get her nutrients and fiber is important.
Wick (my rabbit) is a runt with an underbite/malocclusion and a crooked jaw (front teeth don’t match up). He’s 1 year old and just had his 5th molar grinding yesterday. So on one hand, I will defend and say that a regular dental rabbit who is happy outside of dental discomfort periods is one that can live a happy life; however, Wick, being young and resilient, has very straight-forward dental grindings that he recovers from within a few hours afterwards. For an older rabbit who has potentially a more complicated procedure each time and an aged immune/nervous system, the period for recovery and stress may affect it. In my opinion, I think every 3 months is quite long since comparatively, Wick is every 1 month. If the time between the procedures are full of fun and happiness for her, that’s something to hold with value as you make this decision. I don’t know exactly what dental procedure is being performed every 3 months, but would shortening the interval (getting the procedure done when the issue is slightly less severe/impacting her daily life/compromising her immune system) help? The 5% chance of survival for each op— is this because of the complexity of the operation, or more because of her? (i.e. The procedure is really tough vs. the procedure is not too complex, but the rabbit is inherently not as quick to recover)
Would you say she’s in pain when you don’t give her metacam? Typically, metacam makes rabbits tired and a bit lethargic. I’m wondering if the reliance on metacam may be affecting how her body recovers? Complete shot in the dark. How long does it take for her to normalize following a dental procedure?
In terms of the collapsing on her side and breathing heavily, I’m unsure if this is just the result of aging (I’ve never had an older rabbit) or potentially another condition.
It’s great she is still active and wants cuddles. A rabbit who is active is generally one that wants to continue moving around. She doesn’t sound depressed, which could help you in making your decision as well. In my opinion, I don’t think it’s time.
The answers provided in this discussion are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet. Seek the advice of your veterinarian or a qualified behaviorist.