I could use some advice-UPDATE

[FrankieFlash]

So I’m not sure any of you guys remember but I only mentioned it once or twice but I have a casual “friend” from High School who got a rabbit a while back. When I talked to her the first time the poor thing was on grids, being fed potatoes and carrots (whole carrots cut up) and had no hay, no pellets, no litter box, etc. I helped my “friend” but teaching her about their hocks, hay being super important, pellets too since it was a baby, and tried to explain litter box training.

 Well tonight (months later) I get a call from her asking if I will take the rabbit. I had a feeling this day would come and I was already preparing myself for it but I didn’t expect it to be now- When I’m having the roughest financial situation I’ve ever had and still trying to find a place to live come August.

I volunteer at a local rabbit rescue so I’ve filled a surrender form (there was no email option) explaining the situation and I’m waiting to hear back from them. I feel so bad for this rabbit. She’s a girl, younger than bunjamin (probably 6-7 months), lionhead, unfixed, probably never seen a vet. If the rescue can’t take her idk what I’ll do. I thought about trying to find it a nice home with one of my friends who have become bunny lovers of Bunjamin and offering to help them learn how to take care of them but I don’t think a lot of people my age are really wanting the responsibility of a pet. So I feel awful. I go volunteering tomorrow morning so I hope I can talk to someone about it. I do plan on eventually seeing if bunjamin wants to pick out a friend when money is better.

 I’m sure someone else here has been in this situation. How did you tell your heart it’s okay not to take her in?

[LBJ10]

I guess if it was me, I would find a way to take the rabbit myself. I would be too heartsick over it. Since you have a rabbit rescue near you (I don’t), then see what they have to say first. Hopefully they will be willing to help her out.

[jerseygirl]

Firstly i want to say I’m peeved by this girl. Grr! That is not fair she is dumping problem on you. I should button up as I really don’t know details…

Was she open to the suggestions you made when you first tried to help? Did she make any changes? What I’m wondering is would she “step up” and work out how she can do better by the rabbit and keep it herself. What are her reasons for giving it up? (need I ask… *sigh*)

I absolutely can see why you would want to just take the bunny. But if you are struggling
at the moment I fear in the end, your taking it would cause you more heartache. you can certainly be an advocate for this rabbit, but you don’t have to be it’s permanent carer.

Even if the Rescue can’t take get, they are likely to have contacts of someone who can. Or someone who can at least foster her.

Have faith there is a happy solution for this bun that doesn’t involve you being put under a strain. There are plenty people (like yourself) that care and will work something out.

Again though, I would see if her original owner can be convinced to keep her and make improvements if you think that’s an option. This done tactfully so that if she’s not willing to do so, then she’ll still allow you being involved in finding place for it to go. If you are willing to take that on, that is.

Sometimes it sucks loving rabbits this much hey?! (((hugs)))
Get talking with your rabbit contacts and I’m sure the solution will present.

[FrankieFlash]

Thanks so much both of you. I can’t sleep wondering what the fate of this Bun is. I think I really want try to find it a home even if I end up being the foster for a short bit. The only way I could keep her is if Bunjamin takes a liking to her and vice-versa (I’m suppose to be making a large sum of money this weekend) but I’m not sure I want to introduce them. Especially since she hasn’t seen a vet. Her reasons for not wanting her is she wanted something to cuddle and play with and she thinks the rabbit hates her and would be happier with other rabbits. I tried to explain that bunnies “cuddle” and play in their own way tonight and that her hormones are also going to make her less friendly.

Back then, she did take my suggestions of food. I don’t know to which degree but I know she got pellets and hay. I made sure she knew potatoes were lethal basically and tried to tell her carrots should be used as treats. I linked her to this site and rabbitspeak but when she called I didn’t really push it too much. I know this girl and I think it would make her just stop asking me for help and take it to the humane society like her bf suggested. The humane society up there knows even less about rabbits than she does so I don’t even consider that an option. She wants to see it go to a good home and I think she has a good heart but I don’t think it’s in her works to learn what she would need to be happy with the bun if you get what I’m saying.

I really just want to go get her right away, trim her nails, give her a good condo, the proper veggies, vet care, and let her run around and binky but the vet care and new condo part require more money than I have right now. As you can see I’m very back and forth about what to do. I really appreciate the hugs. I don’t have many contacts in the Bunny world but I’m going to try!

[Roberta]

Grab the bun… Get it home… Speak to the people at the rescue and they can possible make you an official foster and arrange subsidized or free vet care whilst they find a long term foster of forever home. You are going to be stressing until you know this bun is safe. Make the first step and bring him home just keep her and Bunjamin seperate for the time being. After a vet check you might find it OK to keep them in the same room but if you do not intend keeping her then bonding them would upset Bunjamin when he had to be separated. If the shelter can help subsidize care costs whilst you are a foster that might make it easier then you can consider keeping at a later date if things work out. Worst case is you know she is safe and well and that the home she will eventually go to will be properly investigated and the people provided with all the right information before she goes to them.

[Roberta]

Your shelter might also have some spare cages or something you can use, or can you take the cage with the bun amd modify it to be more comfortable ? In fact I would insist on getting the cage too. Then you can give it a good clean while little bunny girl has a play in the bathroom and line it with lots of news papers or straw mats so it comfy, a nice little card board box to gnaw and nest in. It will be fine for a few days (or longer) while you make arrangements with the shelter.

[jerseygirl]

I agree. If you do take the rabbit from her, insist the habitat comes too. 1) because then less chance that habitat being filled by her with a new “more cuddly” rabbit. 2) because you or the Rescue might be able to use it once modified. Rescue may be able to use as temporary holding cage for any of their rabbits.

Another concern; make sure the Rescue understands this is not your rabbit being surrendered. I’d even have it noted on the form and witness them signing the note. My concern is that when time comes when you wish to adopt, you might be denied because records say you’ve surrendered a rabbit. Even though you volunteer there, if it’s a large organization, the paperwork side of things might be run by different people that are unaware you volunteer etc.

[Roberta]

Hi Jerseygirl… My thoughts exactly on the cage… Good point about the paperwork. In fact I would probably not give them any docs until you have sat down and discussed the matter with them. The might decided to take a different path and view it as a rescue (by you) not a surrender. You saw the chance to get a neglected and at risk bun out of the clutches of a Dimwitted Flibbity Jibbit and took it.

[FrankieFlash]

Hi guys… Bad news- the rescue said they can not take her. I haven’t spoke to them personally but the head of the organization emailed me. He said maybe you could keep an eye on this rabbit and check back in a few weeks. I don’t know if I can just forget about it for a couple weeks. I’m really disappointed. Granted, I couldn’t explain the situation in full but I feel like I’m going to be hung out to dry. I did say twice in the surrender form it is not my rabbit. If they screw the paperwork and later on say I can’t adopt a rabbit from them I’ll probably say good riddance and drive to the other rabbit rescue further away. I know I treat rabbits right and I would personally never surrender a rabbit. OH and my “friend” said I can have all her stuff including a new cage. I just worry about its size. And I don’t know this rabbit’s habits so if I did a smaller cage with a pen, she could kill our carpet and our huge deposit we have on this place right now or spray everywhere.

[Roberta]

Contact the other rescue. If its a girl they will spray but it can be contained. Basically are you willing to see this bunny taken to a pound and put to sleep because you have a vain idiot for a friend who decided her fashion accessory wasn’t co operating. If you keep her in the laundry for now then the spraying won’t be an issue and possibly once you are at the shelter one of the other volunteers may be able to help but DO NOT submit the surrender paper work in your name. Write a letter stating that you rescued the rabbit. Half the problem is solved if you have the habitat. If you have a regular vet it might pay to speak to them too and see if they will do a general check up gratis or discount.

[Kokaneeandkahlua]

Any chance you can keep the rabbit for a while? \Use criagslist/kijiji to try to rehome in the mean time if the rescue has no room?

How stressful, *hugs*

[Kokaneeandkahlua]

Or, any BB’ers near you who could help too? If you can’t foster for a while, do we have members nearby who would be willing to?

[Elrohwen]

I would contact any rabbit rescue anywhere nearby. Lots of them will at least list the rabbit and help you find a home, even if they don’t have room to take it in. It seems strange to me that you volunteer there but you still had to fill out a form and do things “officially”? At the rescue I’ve worked for, I would’ve talked to the owner and she would’ve done everything possible to take the rabbit in, or help me provide care. That whole part seems strange to me, so I’m hoping you’ll have better luck with another place.

Would you be able to take her in for a while if a rescue would list her for adoption and help find a home? What about if they could provide food for her? I think you might be able to work something out with them. Definitely post on Craigslist too.

[Roberta]

Checked, there are atleast 4 rabbit shelters in the Michigan area. There’s an old adage ” The squeaky wheel gets the oil”

Get the bunny and the habitat. Place them in a room (I.E. Laundry) where spraying is not an issue. Advise your Friend that you will report her to animal welfare if she gets another pet. Then hound every rabbit shelter in the Michigan state until they are willing to help even if its purely for the purpose of making you go away. Don’t worry about this damaging your reputation, down the track they will remember the lengths you went to and want that enthusiasm on their team. Right now you are making excuses. The extra cage is sorted, the vet bills can be sorted, the spraying problem is addressed. SO what else…..? I’ve got 5… It wasn’t convenient when 2 little 3 week old buns needed a home but I took them, it wasn’t convenient when they had babies but I loved them and rehome all but one who was returned (Evil Nermal) it wasn’t convenient when I had to deal with a second litter and had electricty water and rates bills in arrears but I coped, I did my research, found a local green grocer, I planted the herbs and veg they like I went cap in hand and found discounted or free items, I networked…. It can be done but not if you want to sit back and hope that someone will hand you the answers and solutions. You have to put in the manual labor if you want to save the money.

I finished school at the age of 15, I am now in a senior management role. Yes, I still have a few financial issues to deal with due to unforeseen explosion of the hot water system etc but I did not get where I a by waiting for someone else to fix the problem. I recently got a really good pay rise because I was not willing to sit back and put up with the directors complacency SO you are young, you want to get ahead use this as a learning experience. There is a lot of competition out there … Hitch up your hipsters, hug down your T shirt and go over there and collect that rabbit. then spend the weekend badgering every Rabbit welfare and animal rescue agency within a 1000 mile radius. Do not take NO for an answer. If they can’t take the rabbit then request assistance with the bills. If they object ask what they really have to offer foster carers and why their success rate is so low…… Be a massive pain in the butt.

[Beka27]

You need to help but only IF you can. If you cannot, tell your friend what her options are (surrendering, placing an ad online, etc…) Your responsibility is always going to be FIRST AND FOREMOST to the rabbit (pets) you have now. You need to recognize YOUR limitations or else it’s incredibly easy to become overwhelmed, in which case everyone suffers (humans and rabbits alike). This person is expecting you to drop everything to take this rabbit. If you simply say you cannot, they will either need to “man up” and shoulder the responsibility, or find another alternative.

A third option is saying you can foster/take physical custody of the rabbit, but that person will need to pay for it’s care until you can find it a new home, including food, proper housing, vet care, AND spaying.

[Roberta]

Ooo I like the third option Beka…. But get the bunny first or she is likely to put it in the pound. You can always negotiate. She pays for the vet check and vaccinations then contributes $10 per week to food.

[Beka27]

No, you can’t negotiate once you have the bunny.  That’s like buying a used car and calling the guy up a week later and saying, “You’re gonna give me money for a new muffler and tires, right?”  Once you have possession, she’ll just stop answering phone calls if no agreement was in place prior. If she really wants to get rid of the bunny, she’ll agree to anything to get it out of her care.

[Roberta]

OH BTW the email route… Not so good… They haven’t got to look you in the eye when they prepare their hypocritical speech. Do it face to face.

[Sarita]

You know, you can only do what you can do. Do not get stuck with a rabbit or any other animal you cannot afford to take care of. You might check to see if there is a local humane society or SPCA that can take the rabbit.

I had a client call me today because her neighbor found a domestic rabbit and was going to release it – I told her I cannot take the rabbit and to take him to the shelter and that is all I can hope for.

That is all you can hope for too – DO NOT feel guilted by ANYONE into taking an animal you cannot afford – you should give her the information to seek a home or shelter for the rabbit herself – it’s her responsibility NOT YOURS.

[RabbitPam]

I’m with Beka on this. Once you physically take the bunny, especially with supplies, it’s yours and this “friend” has washed her hands of it. In this instance, it is clear that the bunny needs a better home than this girl, but do not take it. You are being put in a position to allow an irresponsible person to reinforce her idea that it’s ok to do things on impulse because there will always be someone there to dump her mess onto. She does need to Man Up. You can assist with researching rescues, help with a call or email to ask if one will take this bunny, and the minute one of them says yes, either give her the info. and directions to get it there (her bf has a car, I’m sure) or offer to drive her and her bunny and her stuff and take them all to the available rescue. To drop off, have her sign her own paperwork, and hand over her neglected pet. She needs to do it. Not you. She needs to learn she can’t handle a pet, not you. And she needs to learn she doesn’t play helpless and keep friends. If none of the rescues can take the bunny, then SHE can advertise on Petfinder until it is re-homed.

Your first priority is your bunny, your home and your own finances. More importantly, people don’t often see that saying No may be the response someone needs to hear to allow them to grow and learn, just as you want to learn to say it and manage your own priorities and well being.

[Malp_15]

I’ve been in this situation MANY times. It’s sooooo hard to say no when there is this poor little uncared for animal involved. But in the end NO ONE can guilt you into taking this rabbit (including yourself!)! What is most important right now is that you look after yourself and Bunjamin. You don’t want to end up in a situation where you spend all your money on the new rabbit and then all of a sudden Bunjamin gets sick/injured and you can’t pay for his vet care, or some other emergency with yourself! And this woman needs to learn responsibility, if she can’t deal with the situation she put herself in, then she needs to follow the right routes, herself, instead of waiting for someone to rescue her.

And lets just say you did take this rabbit it, that is one more rabbit sitting in a shelter without a home. When the time is right for you, you can rescue a rabbit from a life of living in a shelter. And don’t feel bad, feel proud of yourself for doing what is right and good for you & Bunjamin.

[Elrohwen]

I definitely agree with the others! Only do what you can do. It doesn’t sound like you have the resources to take in a second bun right now, so don’t let her guilt you into it. If you can, you can help her find a new home, or as I suggested before, even take the bun in temporarily provided someone else will pay for food and vet care (like a shelter – I wouldn’t trust the friend to do it).

I think Pam has some great advice about saying no and making her take responsibility, but I know that can be easier said than done when you don’t trust the person to do what’s right. Give her some time to at least try to do it on her own before offering to help with anything like listing the bunny or talking to shelters.

[Roberta]

I suppose you’re all right just because something is worth fighting for doesn’t mean we should actually make an effort to facilitate change or find lateral solutions….

[FrankieFlash]

Okay FIrst, I do volunteer with this rescue on a weekly basis but yet, I don’t think they know my name. I knew that no one but one employee who has no standing or authority would be there today. I hoped that the head of the organization who was the one who emailed me back would come out to the farm today but no luck. I filled out the form because it was the only way of emailing about the situtation I could find. I feel like a pea in the bowl of vegetables.

Second, Roberta I think you need to calm down. I am doing what I can. YOU have no idea what my current situation is. I know you are trying to help but you’re making me cry.

I will do all what I can to help this rabbit. I was gone all morning doing a responsibility I find important even if no one knows I am at there at this rescue. Now I have less than an hour to clean up all traces of owning a rabbit before my landlord comes over. I’m trying to get some research about the rescues in MI. Of course I’m going to start with the one I’ve been to and know. Now I’m moving on. There are only 3 Roberta in lower MI. I cannot afford to drive 4+ hours to the rescues up north.

Also, I live an hour away from this girl and have previous commitments like, working, going to these house showings to find a place to live, and taking care of my own bunny that I CANNOT just drop everything and drive an hour to get that rabbit no matter how I feel.

I have the plan that if I cannot find a rescue to take the rabbit before I take it in myself I’m going to offer to teach her about rabbits in depth and come over and actually help her this weekend (I’ll have to make time- my life is CRAZY right now)

Everyone else, I haven’t had time to read your comments thoroughly but I will when I get a chance. I appreciate the support I have been given. If anyone on BB is in the lower half of MI please message me if you can help.

[FrankieFlash]

Oh and I should add that while she is going to give me all the stuff if I take the rabbit- I know she will NOT pay for vet care or it’s care. I think if she could afford vet care, she might have done it herself who knows. I think if I ask her to do that kinda stuff she’ll say forget it and take it to humane society where it’ll suffer the same fate its in now.

[RabbitPam]

Frankie,
Take a moment to read the other replies because we are actually supporting you and I think it’s helpful to read that there are a few different points of view. Of course you are involved in your own life and you do not need to justify any of your commitments. You are showing great compassion and effort. I hope our other replies will strike you as helpful.

Roberta, snarky and sarcastic is not allowed on the forums (see rules) so please allow others to disagree with you without going on the defensive. Thank you.

[FrankieFlash]

thanks rabbitpam. I just did so I do feel my response was a bit hasty. I just feel so helpless. I found a rescue that will help a person adopt their rabbit out if the person takes care for it until then and they even help pay or get a discount for the spaying so I’m going to gather all my information and present it to her this afternoon. I know in my heart that I’d good care of her but the timing is just awful. I’m stressed to the gills. Becoming an insomiac. I’ll keep you posted with her decision. Granted, she tells me and actually does what she says.

[RabbitPam]

You mean she will get the discount etc. while she tries to adopt it out, right? Not that you will be taking it and doing that yourself.
I hear your stress. Just trying to mother hen you a bit.

[FrankieFlash]

yes well here’s the link. maybe I’m understanding it wrong: http://www.michiganrabbitrescue.org/surrender.php

[Elrohwen]

I’m with Pam that you should talk this girl into taking care of the rabbit while the shelter finds it a home. It doesn’t cost much to buy some hay and pellets – you can tell her how to get them cheaply. I’m sure she can look after it for a little longer while the shelter looks for a home.

I’m with Pam that your primary responsibility is to yourself and Bunjamin. If you’re so stressed and overdrawn that you don’t think you can take in another bun, then don’t! Don’t let her guilt you since it’s her responsibility. You can help her out, since I know you want to help and want what’s best for this bun, but don’t let her guilt you into taking it and paying for all of its care when you don’t think you’re in the position to do it.

[RabbitPam]

Just took a glance at the website and that looks perfect for her to work with as an “Owner Surrender”. They will take it from there once you hook her up with them. I think that’s a great way to go for both of you, and the bunny.

Btw, it’s bothering me that feeling guilt is by anyone other than her. If someone should feel guilty, it’s her, certainly not you. You’re a great bunny mom. To Bunjamin.

[FrankieFlash]

Thank you. I do think she does feel bad. I’m not sure how to say this but I’m not sure she is all “there” if you know what I mean. I’ve known her since middle school and she struggled hard to pass all the classes/grades. Let’s just say she’s really blonde. I can say that cuz I am blonde I think that’s the only reason I’m not mad at her. I would be angry though if she ignored everything I tell her today and took the bun to the humane society. I know that humane society and they do not do rabbits. They’ll occasionally have one and set it on top of the puppies or kittens in a small cage and I just I don’t want to see that be her fate too. Or I would’ve been angry had she not come to me when I reached out so many times to help her learn about Buns and she dumped it outside or something equally horrible. But I also feel like she’s one of those superficial pet owners that don’t really feel on the same level as people like us or my mom, etc.

[Elrohwen]

You’ll have to turn on your guilting skills then to make her actually feel some responsibility! If she does have a good heart and does want to find this bun a home, I think working with her and that shelter would be a great plan as long as she’ll keep the bunny while they find it a home. Just stress to her that’s the only way her bunny will find a good home. Even if it’s not quite true, tell her the humane society will put the bunny to sleep and hope that she steers clear of that path.

I just don’t understand how people can be so clueless. It’s one thing when it’s little kids, but with adults? They can be responsible enough to go to work and even to raise kids, but give them a small furry animal and they become clueless.

 

Eta: I still feel bad that the rescue you work with isn’t being more helpful! The rescue community is usually good about helping their own, and giving volunteers more help than people off the street. It’s a shame they don’t even know your name I’m sure the bunnies know and love you though!

[FrankieFlash]

Thanks Elrohwen. I was pretty upset with them this morning but I knew if I didn’t go I’d only be punishing the bunnies and they’d have to wait longer for their fresh hay. That’s the only part I do that they really like. They could care less about their poopies on the floor Today a lot of them were begging for us to come do their pen next. But I also saw that every pen was full and that they were having medical issues as sniffles is going around so that makes more sense why they can’t help out if money AND space is tight.

I plan on guilting her to the best of my ability. I’m going to suggest if she no longer wishes to keep the bunny, she contacts MRR and asks if they will help her adopt it out. In the meantime I’m willing to go over there and spend some time with the bun and teach her about their language and that will also be my way of checking on the bun’s health condition. If it’s worse, I might be able to have more persuasion on the rescues to get involved.

[RabbitPam]

Your description of her makes it sound a little more understandable. I think you can impress upon her the way to work with this shelter that will help her find a new home. Any other teaching about care will just prolong this situation for the bunny that needs someone now who will take better care of it. If she’s learned from you before, then taking this step will be something she is able to come around to with your explanation. I think the experience will help her to learn from it. That may serve her well in the future. I see now why you are being kind – maybe it’s her BF who needs to know that the Humane Society may be harmful but this rescue will work with them, and have him help her prepare for an adoption. Put the good option in both their laps.

[LittlePuffyTail]

I don’t have any advice that hasn’t already been said. I just want to offer my support as I’ve been in similar situations many times. It can be a burden to the heart to love and care about the wellbeing of animals when there are so many people that dont. Youre a wonderful person and youre doing all you can to help this bunny. You can only home as many bunnies as is reasonable for your situation.

I’m hoping that you can talk to your friend and that she is willing to listen and take responsibility for her bunny.

((((((Bunny Hugs))))))))

[Roberta]

Still wracking my brain… There has to be someway I can help or info I can find for you…. Hang in there maybe the rescue can foot the vet bill and help with the food. Not giving up. Hang in there I know what its like and how frustrating it is.

[FrankieFlash]

Thanks Roberta and thanks LPT and RP.

A brief update (I started an full-update and it got really long and not to the point): We’re still working on a solution. It’s either she keeps the bun and starts the process of connecting with a rabbit rescue who will help her adopt it out (and get the rabbit fixed, etc) or I take the bun. I know the second one shouldn’t be an option but I’m having serious doubts she will get involved with rescue if I don’t hold her hand or take the rabbit. I have a feeling she’ll just give it to one of her equally UN-responsible friends (she says she wants to know who is taking her). My boyfriend says if it comes down to the second option he’ll help financially and physically caring for the bun (he’s a good guy) and I know that I probably could pay for the major expenses. It’s the extra “emergency” money, the monthly extra money for veggies, and the extra care if they don’t bond that worries me the most. OH and Bunjamin not getting enough attention (he demands attention like 12 hours of the day lol)

I will continue to update if you’d like. I appreciate all the support and advice you all have given me. I don’t think I would be sane if I had to go through this alone. I love BB and having rabbit-lovers to talk to.

[equalsign]

This sucks so bad. I have been in this situation before. I guess on the bright side, Bunjamin might demand less attention if he gets a partner.

Are you still trying to sell those beads? How has that been working out?

[FrankieFlash]

I thought that too. It really depends if they could bond or not.

And yes the bead business continues. It kinda goes up and down like most online business. I’m picking up other jobs too. Hair business of course like always plus im back to keeping a lady with dementia company when her family has plans (basically cooking for her and talking)

[Roberta]

The boyfriend sounds like a “keeper”. I know it doesn’t seem like it but you have made progress, you are getting some options you didn’t have before.

[Roberta]

The cost of an emergency scares me witless as well. After the water heater blowing up twice in a week (both times repairs were about the same as the insurance excess so I had to pay cash) and the ceiling falling in (insurance covers that but there’s still the excess and ancillary costs) not to mention a continuous series of unfortunate events and a blocked drain that is not covered by insurance and is going to cost a small fortune to dig up and replace.. I just do not have the resources right now. BUT a friend on the other side of the city has directed me to her vet who is a bunny specialist. He charges $50 for a spay or neuter all the ones up here charge $130 plus and Piglets barber trips are $250. Its a long long drive especially for someone recovering from driving anxiety but atleast its an option if something happens and I need to get treatment for them. Got home yesterday and my neighbour had decided to take my $1200 wool rug that was out waiting to be collected by WA restoration to be cleaned after the roof fell in. She decided since it was covered in ceiling insulation she’d use it to throw on her back garden to keep the grass down. The stuff on it is shocking and shouldn’t be inhaled and if it gets wet turns to concrete. She took it from the shelf under my carport (were its being collected from) I found it lying in her front garden in the rain. Luckily it was still rolled so the crud didn’t get wet but honestly if her throat had been in arms reach I’d be in custody right now…. WORDS have been had !!!!!

[FrankieFlash]

So major update: I visited the rabbit tonight. I cannot leave her in those conditions. We would be bringing her home tonight but my dad has said no and he’s actually mad I’m going to rescue it bc he thinks bc it’s a long hair he’ll be allergic so he’s not talking to me. Right now I’m riding in car to take her liter box with hay to maybe give her a little relief since I cannot take her home. It might be a couple days unfortunately. Her conditions are not good- no hay when I got there, she on wire bottom cage and her hair is so matted that stuff is sticking to her bum. (not sure if poopy butt). She gets no veggies but carrots occasionally. She was spraying some deodorizing spray when she did brush her that I know it’s not safe for a rabbit to ingest. Almost there more but I’ll do best to update.

[Roberta]

Would it be possible for you to keep her at your boyfriends home until something can be sorted ? or maybe your neighbours?

[Roberta]

Hi FF where are you in Michigan… I’m trying to see if any Cheezepeeps are in your area or maybe someone nearby that can get to you. I’ll even try URRKN, they usually transport rescue kittehs to safe homes but they might be persuaded to help in this instance… It can’t hurt to ask.

[FrankieFlash]

I live with my bf and my dad and one city but my parents house is in the city with rabbit and I came up to help with garage sale and for fathers day. My mom is trying to figure a situation in which we ca get her out sooner. I was really hoping the girl took my original advice but she really didn’t at all

[Roberta]

Which city is the rabbit in… I am trying to find someone who can take her for you even if its until you can sort a place at the shelter… Cheezepeeps and URRKN are all animal protection no kill motivated.

[Roberta]

Got someone doing a ring round in the Michigan Ohio states…..

[Roberta]

Trying to get hold of one of the URRKN admins, have another friend living in Michigan who might have contacts but she is unwell and has probably gone to bed… Get me the city location as soon as you can… Going to put everything into this.

[TBpony414]

Just wanted to chime in with some supportive (((((hugs)))))

Since everything is sooo stressful right now, remember to take deep breaths and carve out a few minutes a day to relax yourself – even just 5 or 10 minutes of just sitting quietly petting Bunjamin, soaking in the bathtub, going on a walk in the evening, listening to music You don’t want to burn yourself out, although in crazy stressful times sometimes it’s unavoidable. Keep us updated!

ETA: Just a thought – you may want to take a few photographs documenting bun living in the miserable conditions. Since it sounds like you will be taking the bunny soon, a rescue may be more willing to help out or even take it from you if they see the disgusting state of things.

[Roberta]

OK I’m getting some responses but every one is asking the same question. What city/town… Have also put out feelers in the group for vets in the area that may be open to helping…. Just need the area in Michigan, one person knows a Rat Lady that has bunny contacts on the peninsula but we can’t do anything yet as she may be on the other side of the state. URRKN can’t provide urgent support but I have asked that they share my facebook post with any members in the Michigan area.

[Roberta]

One friend sent this but I have already checked out the rescue sites. BUT it can’t hurt for you to have a look through. There may be something there I ignored or you missed. https://www.google.com/search?q=rabbit+rescue+michigan&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla%3Aen-US%3Aofficial&client=firefox-a

[FrankieFlash]

Thanks Roberta for all your Help. I will message you the cities that the rabbit is in and where I live. I can’t open link for now bc I have to borrow a computer while I’m at my parents.

Thanks tb for the hugs. I am most definitely taking a breaks and petting bunjamin bc he always knows what to say to make me feel better

[FrankieFlash]

Roberta I just tried messaging you but I don’t know it went through on my phone. If not I will do so when I can get on the computer

[LittlePuffyTail]

I think you’re a very compassionate soul to want to help this rabbit. Hopefully, you will be able to rehome or get a rescue to cooperate very soon.

[Roberta]

At this stage I just need the city/town not your personal address if you could send on your phone Bunny = *Here* or if you are taking hi to your place then Bunny = *Here* then *Here* on *Date*

[Roberta]

Just sent you a Facebook message. As I said I have people waiting for the general area to know if they can help. Its night here and I can’t access facebook tomorrow from work but if you can at least let me know if we are talking Nth, Sth Est or Wst I can let people know and eliminate those that aren’t in a position to travel. Plus it will mean that everyone up there will have the whole Sunday to network!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[RabbitPam]

As you continue to work out options, I am really going to emphatically beg you NOT to take this bunny into your home with your Dad.
It is Father’s Day. He has stated he cannot have this bunny and why. He is so upset that he isn’t talking to you. I actually do not blame him, because I have allergies and it can be a nightmare very quickly. Please realize that as you concern yourself with the welfare of the bunny, you may be sending your Dad to the emergency room. You have already upset him by showing a total disregard for his health and his wishes. It is his house, and he’s not being tough to be mean. He knows that allergies are cumulative, and once you cross a threshold, it causes inability to breathe, hives, and even can be fatal. I am not exaggerating, but allergic reactions must be respected. And people’s health, living conditions and wishes also must be respected. If you were told that bringing the bunny in could cause instant illness to Bunjamin, you probably wouldn’t do it. Give your father the same compassion and courtesy. I have allergies, and it can get very scary. He needs to have his own family concerned about his health, and I am not making this up just to dissuade you.

And be honest with yourself as well. If you are really rescuing this bunny partly because you just want a second one, then there is no more chance it will be rehomed by you than that it will be by its owner. Give your friend an opportunity to do the right thing now, before assuming she won’t work with you and the available shelters. You can keep on her by phone, you can work with Roberta (who clearly wants to actively rehome this bunny with you) to get it done fast. But make that your goal. Not disrupt your own household for someone who will fall back on you for help again…and again…and again.
I really am sorry to be harsh here, and apologize if I make too strident a point. But your Dad and your own bunny come first.

[Roberta]

Must go to bed, I have work in the morning and a very busy week. FF send the city/town to one of the email addresses I gave you or post them here. As I said I can’t access facebook from work but I can reply to feeds in my email. Sadly by the time I get them it will be Sunday night in your hemisphere so we will have lost a day and many people will have to work through the week which means the chance of anyone collecting the bun will most likely be delayed until they have a free day to drive especially if they have to travel any distance. Just get the City/Town to me as soon as you can.

[Sarita]

I have to agree with RabbitPam. I understand you wanting to help this rabbit, but you have posted about having financial difficulties as well and you have posted that your landlord doesn’t even know about your current rabbit…I think you can help, but don’t take this rabbit into your own possession because you aren’t helping your own situation and could possibly be jeopardizing your father’s health and your own financial situation and your housing situation…it’s really not worth that in my opinion. You can help in other ways.

[FrankieFlash]

I appreciate your input. I did NOT disrespect my dad. I did not bring the rabbit home. I am trying to find a solution that gets her in a safe place as soon as possible while maintaining a positive relationship with my dad. My dad left the room before I could explain anything and he ISN’T allergic to rabbits but thinks he might be if one was long haired. He also thought he would be allergic to Bunjamin and he isn’t. He realizes that his reaction then was over-dramatic too. My dad has trouble accepting that I am an adult and I can make my own choices. If I was living under his roof, it’d be a different story but my home is mine. None the less, we are visiting at my parents house so OF COURSE I respected them and didn’t bring it home. What I meant is that we want to help her even if it means we have to foster her temporarily. My boyfriend has taken financial responsibility (he can, he has nice job now). In regards to father’s day, me and my boyfriend woke up at the crack of dawn though and bought him coffee and breakfast in bed and he’s feeling better. I think he realized he didn’t give me a chance to explain I have no plans to keep the rabbit. I just worry that in her condition, she could go into stasis at any moment. I do think that taking the liter box over and showing the girl how to keep the rabbit using it was great because the bun is using it (and now she’s at least getting hay). I’m taking my mom’s lead on this situation and wouldn’t have brought the rabbit to her house unless she thought it was the best idea. I hope I didn’t confuse you guys but this whole weekend I haven’t got much sleep between worrying, working my tail off (oops don’t have one!), and getting up to help my family. My family is super important to me and I wouldn’t risk it all. Now off to clean our cars and garage because that is what my dad LOVES for father’s day.

[RabbitPam]

OK, I have to admit that you did confuse me a lot and therefore I made my response to what I read. Thanks so much for clarifying. When you said your boyfriend was living with you and your Dad, it really seemed like way too much. Now I understand that Home refers to 1. your own home with your BF and 2. your parent’s home where you are visiting this weekend. While it does sound like your Dad thinks he might be allergic and has no desire to find out for sure (many of us would rather not ever get stung by a bee for the same reason, just in case) you are obviously both calming down and making a nice day for him. Thank you for explaining.
And since the litter pan/hay is helping, my hope that she can undertake her own responsibility in re-homing this bunny is renewed. Your BF sounds like a nice guy. Maybe this whole thing needs to be approached with a little less urgency and let it take the time it needs to get bunny a new adopting home. I doubt bunny will come to any terribly serious harm with the slow and steady pace of cleaning up your friend’s temporary care in the meantime.
Garage cleaning: what a great gift!!!!

[lwayne]

FrankieFlash, have you tried inviting your friend over to your place? Try inviting both her and her boyfriend over (you can make up some excuse or just say to chat, or have lunch/dinner). If they see (even without you saying anything) how well taken care of and happy Bunjamin is and how you have him all set up with plenty of hay, they may “learn” better than you telling them. I just don’t want them to feel like they are being lectured, cause some people turn away if they feel they are been lectured. You can be real subtle.. while they are there, casually feed him his salad greens/change out his water, let him out to play, etc.

[FrankieFlash]

Thanks RP! I just didn’t wanna anyone to think I’m some rude kid. I try to take care of my parents as much as they still help take care of me

lwayne- I most definitely tried to invite her over. I even kinda like tried to be nonchalant and be like let’s do you hair here because I know she would see Bunjamin and depending on the time of day (I would have to plan it) she would see how happy and friendly he is. But sadly, she turned me down. I think she doesn’t really want to learn to much. She was thrilled that she used the liter box I gave her but when I tried to explain and show her like how happy the rabbit got with hay she didn’t really seem amused. I found out last night this is all really boyfriends fault because she had met a really cute, friendly rabbit of a friends of hers and said she wanted a rabbit but he then suprised her with it one day and she wasn’t prepared. The poor thing is so scared of humans I couldn’t check it’s health condition at all she thumps constantly

I don’t plan on keeping her myself but now that we have a place to live in August and money is picking up, I will (if me and my dad can work out a solution) be willing to foster her. My mom, the biggest sweetheart ever has also offered to sponsor her for a whole year if my rabbit rescue I already work with take her in. We’re now just waiting to see what news comes in. I’m staying with my parents longer because of this because I don’t want to leave her in this girls care longer than I have to if you know what I’m saying.

[Roberta]

Hi All,
This is not going to be a fast process by any means but I am getting nibbles so hopefully there will be someone able to adopt or foster by the end of the week but I suspect it might take a few days longer to co-ordinate. The 12 hr timezone difference is making it a little tricky but I am working on it.
What I am going to need is somewhere for the people who want to help to contact you. I would recommend going to Gmail or similar and setting up a webmail account for the purpose. Then you aren’t compromising your personal email.
Will keep you posted I have some links to send through also to some of the shelters in the area.

[Roberta]

Hi FF, Check your inbox.
Have found a lady by the name of Wendy in Ypsilanti who can help with fostering, I put her email in the message. Have several other links to sanctuaries etc I will gather up and send through soon.

[Roberta]

also http://www.lastchancerescue.org/ serving Howell, Brighton and Flint areas.

and also this response;  Wish we could, but with our allergies….  How about Great Lakes Rabbit Sanctuary, just south of Ann Arbor in Willis?  http://Www.rabbitsanctuary.org, 734-461-1726, they may be able to help.  Please keep us posted.

[FrankieFlash]

The last rescue is the one I volunteer at and they are a definite no. we tried again me and my mom.

One of our dogs are from last chance. I wasn’t aware they took in rabbits. I’ll look into it

[FrankieFlash]

GREAT NEWS! Thanks so much to Roberta and her contacts, this bun has now found a foster. A better one than me Someone who lives near me and works with a rescue. They’ll help her get cleaned up. I’m so happy. This bun’s life is about to be turned around in a good way

[jerseygirl]

Fantastic! A huge thumbs-up from me for both you, Roberta and this foster carer.

[Elrohwen]

Yay! I’m glad you found a solution!

[Roberta]

Yay…… Silly happy dance ensuing complete with Kermit arms………

[TBpony414]

CONGRATS!!! So impressed with how quickly this situation turned around. The wonders of the internet never cease to amaze me… How cool is it that someone in Australia was able to help someone in USA find a neglected rabbit a new home?? Seriously, that’s awesome. Frankie, I know how trying this experience has been for you but your persistence and passion for animals paid off big time! I bet you feel an enormous weight off your shoulders now

[LittlePuffyTail]

Yayyyyy!!! Glad to hear it!!!!

[Beka27]

Awesome!!! I hope you will be able to keep us updated. Will the foster keep you informed on how she does?

[FrankieFlash]

I’m hoping Beka. I’ve offered to help in any way I can. I’d love to see her after they clean her up and get her some nice digs and see if she starts opening up.

[RabbitPam]

That’s great. Is the current owner bringing bunny to the new foster home?

[FrankieFlash]

Nope. I’m transferring. The rabbit currently resides in my parent’s town and the foster lives in my town so I’m bringing her with me when I come back. I know that ideally the owner of the rabbit should own up to responsibility but if this was left in her hands she would’ve dumped the rabbit outside or at the humane society in her town that is not equipped to handle bunnies.

[RabbitPam]

So all’s well that ends well for the little bunny.

And if this friend ever gets another pet, change your phone number and don’t give it to her. (cynical sigh.) You’re a good person.

[FrankieFlash]

Thanks RP! Even better news- The Foster now has a rescue able to help her with vet care and adoption. Vet care was a big concern of mine. To be honest, I only started talking to her again to check on the bunny that I saw her get on Facebook when she posted a pic of her on wire grids with a pile of carrots in front of her. I have no intentions of staying in touch once the bun is safely with the rescue/foster.

[Roberta]

Gotta love the cheezepeeps and their network.. There has since been several more calls and emails to various members asking if help is still needed and wanting to know what they can do.

[Roberta]

I really love these people, having seen that a foster home is now found they are changing the direction of the push to line up some forever homes once (this baby girl needs a name) little bunny girl has been loved, treated and returned to good health.

[FrankieFlash]

Well her previous owner called her lilo from the movie “lilo and stitch”. But I’m not sure if people usually keep previous names considering she was not a good “parent”. And Roberta, I hope I never have to go through something similar again but if I do, I know you got my back <3 I could kiss ya if you weren't across the world

[RabbitPam]

Some folks keep the original name if they like it and the bunny responds to it, others change it. All rescues need to call a bunny something, so it sticks until the new owner may make one change. Otherwise, it can get confusing to her, although how many of us call our bunnies by about 6 names (Samantha, Sammy, Sammykins, pretty girl, growlypants, etc. etc.).

That’s excellent about the foster getting her to a vet. I’m sure we’ll hear if a forever home is found.

[BinkyBunny]

I have to say WOWZA! This has been amazing. Great support for whatever decision was to be made, but once the decision to move forward was set, I am just amazed at the great efforts and the wonderful result! And I have added a new word to my vocabulary, “Cheezepeeps”, thanks to Roberta. (Before I start using it though– what does it refer to exactly?? LOL)

[Roberta]

Hi BB,
I’m guessing you have heard of LOLCATS and icanhascheezburger.com basically Cheezepeeps are all people who were originally members of the ICHC site and have bonded and become friends because of it, we now have a several hundred strong Facebook site to catch up socially and offer moral and emotional support when things go wrong or someone needs help. Every one there is bound together by one element, their amazing love and compassion for animals of all kinds.. I am always proud to be a cheezepeep but particularly so at the moment. You heard the story of Rumi the little homeless cat that travelled from Ontario Canada to Illinois US, that started there.

[RabbitPam]

I had no idea about Cheezepeeps! I wondered what you meant by that also.
Been getting LOLCats emails daily for a couple of years now. Have a page on the site and repost to Facebook on occasion, but never knew the members networked from it as well.

[Roberta]

We certainly do… Mind you we are made up of the older and more “Earthy” members but we is out there… You should join us…

[FrankieFlash]

We’re transporting her as we speak. We were finally able to take a good look at her when we got her outside the dark appt. she’s a very pretty girl- dark grey/black with chocolate brown eyes. Poor thing is shaking. It’s only her second time in a car. We just keep telling her the future is bright for her now.

[Roberta]

Beautiful girl is heading HOME…. I don’t like the name Lilo as it sounds like an inflatable pool float over here (pronounced LY LOW)… I doubt the name has any good associations for her.
How about “Anana” it means beautiful in Inuit.

[Little]

Aww I wish I could take her Best of luck!!!

[Author]

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