I’m trying very hard to keep myself together, but it’s so hard. I have a family who doesn’t care about animals and an older brother who is downright abusive towards my rabbits. He has schizophrenia/schizoaffective disorder.
My first rabbit I got when he was in the mental hospital. I needed some emotional support because I felt like my family was falling apart, and I just wanted a furry friend there for me in the middle of the night when I couldn’t sleep and while I cried. It was so tense at home, and every day my parent’s were always frustrated and yelling and getting mad at every little thing. Coming home never felt like coming to my sanctuary. I never felt like I could relax at school or at home. My brother is crazy and delusional and at the time probably thought his inner voices were the voice of God or something. Anyhow, at the hospital when he found out I got a rabbit, said something along the lines of “But we’re not meant to have a rabbit!” and threw his tray/some sort of objects. I wasn’t there and didn’t witness it, my mom just told me this after visiting him at the hospital. There was a brief time where my parents wanted me to get rid of the rabbit, but I didn’t want to. I was and still am so attached to this rabbit. They eventually gave up on trying to give him away.
At some point, I started worrying about leaving him for long periods while at school, so I somehow (not sure how) convinced my parents to let me adopt a buddy for him. She was so beautiful, I only really intended to visit rabbits at the shelter but when I played with her at the shelter I could not let her go. I called my mom, who gave me the ok to adopt her. At first the bunny was nervous, but after a month she really warmed up to me and my family and became the sweetest rabbit ever. She would follow me around, and snuggle close to my leg whenever I sat down. I miss her so much and I know I will never find a rabbit like her ever again. She would get sick quite often with respiratory issues though, and after her third bout of a respiratory illness, she passed. The last memory I have of her is giving her a Penicillin injection and then leaving her to go to work. I didn’t have an option to take the day off as I work in healthcare, and not coming in to work could have gotten me fired for patient abandonment. I will always regret not staying with her and hand-feeding her for the day. My family said they would care for her while I was gone, but I doubt they did anything for her looking back. It was probably the worst day of my life, followed by some terrible months. I remember getting home and the first person I see is my brother. He has this smug smile on his face, as if he is happy about something, saying “something has happened”. I immediately ran upstairs and my parents confirmed with me that my beloved bunny was dead. I only had her for a few months, and she was sick a lot so I never really had a chance to bond her with my other rabbit.
I wish I could say that my nightmare ended there. Unfortunately it was just beginning. My brother kept relapsing with his mental illness. At some point I was just chilling by the fire on a cold day, and he just out of the blue tells me “It doesn’t matter if I kill your rabbit because animals don’t have souls.” This is when the string of abuse really started showing. The first incident was me finding him holding my rabbit WAY too close to the fireplace (like right in front where it is really really hot). I told him not to do that, and he only replied “but he likes it!!” I had to take my rabbit back and put him away. He also would pet him way too rough, to the point that when he runs his hand along his head, he would be shoving my rabbit’s head downward. My poor rabbit went from being confident and wanting to play, to scared and cowering at the sight of people. He still tenses up every time he sees my brother or hears his voice (and my brother thinks this is funny). I had also at some point gotten another rabbit and successfully bonded him to a girl rabbit that I bought from someone selling their farm. For some reason my brother mainly picked on my boy though. There was also an incident where he was holding my rabbit and pushing his head back, like he was going to snap the bunnie’s neck.
I moved my rabbits to a locked room for a while, but then my brother would just wait until I had to unlock the room to feed or play with my rabbits, and he would just come out of nowhere and shove past me and grab my rabbit. There were times where I literally screamed and cried out loud and he never stopped no matter how hurt I looked or how many tears I shed. I don’t understand how anyone can be so heartless and see someone so upset, yet not stop. One time I even threw empty plastic cups (light and wouldn’t even hurt) and he just threw my rabbit across the room. I was able to move out of the house for a year, but then I lost my job and had to move back in with my parents. My brother was ok at first, but then he started getting abusive again. I recently took photos of some bald patches on my rabbit where my brother yanks and holds him by the scruff, even though I tell him a million times that you’re not supposed to hold a rabbit like that!
I don’t know what to do. I recently got a job offer across the country and was going to live with my grandparents, but they will not let me take my rabbits with me. They don’t want rabbits anywhere in the house, not even the garage. I really don’t want to give my rabbits away, and it’s really hard to find a decently priced apartment that allows pets. I’m honestly thinking of building a really well insulated trailer for my rabbits so I can take them with me and they can have their own house outside the house just so I can keep them. My parents said I can leave them at home, but with my brother around, HECK no! Another option is seeing if I can find a foster home for my rabbits until I can purchase a house where I can live with them???
Also, I feel really emotionally scarred from all this. Other people just don’t understand, and I’ve been told twice “Think of your poor brother!!” What the heck! I’m falling apart because of everything he’s doing to my beloved rabbits, and it’s “oh, poor him!” Honestly he is being a bully and I know he is upsetting me on purpose. He might have a mental disorder, but he functions really well and has a job that makes significantly more than I do and has benefits. He lives with my parents, with my mom doing his laundry, buying food and making his lunches! He also has 50 K saved up because he just doesn’t spend any money (and this is after buying a car and paying for it completely out of cash). I’m just falling apart here, but better than before. Maybe a little hopeful now that I have a job offer and can move FAR away from him. Is it feasible for me to build a trailer home for my rabbits because no one seems to care about them or want them in their house? Honestly, I’m already starting to make plans. I can’t live without my rabbits, and I miss the one that passed away so much it makes me cry in an instant whenever I think about her.
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