When is it hopeless??

[CarlieL]

 This is mainly to vent lol…I’m about to pull my hair out with these dang buns!! 

 

I don’t know if any of you remember us (haven’t been on here in awhile, crazy summer!!), but I adopted a darling little guy, Rufus, last september who I was/am head over heels for…he’s a bit over a year old now, and was neutered soon after we got him.

 

Then, for some reason  I thought it’d be a good idea to adopt another bun, was planning on doing bunny dates locally but thanks to this forum I learned about Delilah (previously Eni) who was about to be put to sleep in SF early this year. Last minute I found someone to transport her here to Seattle, and another lovely lady picked her up for me and found a foster for a few days. Long story short, we adopted her sight unseen, she was around 1.5 years and already spayed. 

 

I had high hopes that they’d end up getting along in time, but it’s just. not. happening.  And the last time they were together (in a carrier, which they had been doing the best in together), lightning fast Lilah managed to take a huge hunk out of Rufus’ rear end which required an emergency vet visit and $250 worth of stitches and antibiotics.  She just hates him! I don’t know what to do anymore. We haven’t tried any bonding sessions again since then, it’s been about two months.

I’m struggling with what to do now…keep trying, or give up? Our house is tiny, but we’re hoping to move very soon so hopefully we’ll have more room for them to have their own truly separate areas if needed…but it’s really hard right now. Sometimes I wish we hadn’t adopted her (and I KNOW hubby wishes that lol) but she’s such a sweetheart to us, I’m so glad she wasn’t euthanized! She’s not going anywhere, but man. I think the buns are more stressful than our parrots lol. Sigh… 

[Monkeybun]

I would wait until you move. The new place will be completely neutral, and the extra time apart would be good to let things settle. But it is never hopeless. Just look up Markbun’s bonding adventures with Maryanne.

It takes time, and perseverance sometimes. Just take it slow, and don’t let the bunnies decide when they are done. Make them end on good notes. If they learn you will stop if they get all grumpy, they will do so just to get you to leave them alone.

[Elrohwen]

Aww, that’s so frustrating! I think moving to a new house will definitely help – everything will be neutral for both of them and she’ll be out of her element a bit.

Definitely try stress bonding (the carrier sounds like a great start) and try to end on a good note, like MB said. Good luck!

[CarlieL]

 What would you guys say is a good ending? The best I can get out of them is sitting side by side with me petting them…there’s never any grooming between them, even with banana on forehead etc. 

I’m really hoping that, like you’re both saying, a new neutral area might help. The stress bonding is the only thing that has ever worked for them, one time on the way home from them being microchipped I actually saw a flop from one of them, Rufus I think it was. No grooming, but they did great that day. 

I’d forgotten about Maryanne lol. Maybe there’s still hope. I hope so…I would really love to see them get along someday. And it would make life so much easier lol, selfish but true as you all know. And since one of my kids is in a walker, I can’t use baby gates in the house so it’s always separate out of cage times. 

Anyway…thank you.

[Stickerbunny]

I was told anything not negative is positive, even them ignoring each other if that is the best they’ll do.

[kralspace]

I think in the end Markbun let the people at Savabunny bond them, I think it helped to have neutral people involved that that case. I’ve been considering it with my Daisy and Charlie.

[Author]

Messages