Well bonded pair will not accept us humans

[snowstorm1996]

We adopted a bonded brother/sister pair 1 year ago. They are about 2.5 years old. Spayed and neutered. There are only two quiet hoomans in the house, no kids or other pets. They have a large 4 x 8 foot pen and are spoiled with first cut hay, occasional alfalfa, with fresh greens and pellets provided twice daily. They have lots of full house run time. We followed the orientation rules to the book, for the first few months only sitting with them and not reaching for them or forcing any interaction in hopes they would eventually accept us.

One year later, neither rabbit shows any desire whatsoever to interact with us. When we try to pet them, they always run away. The concept of ever picking them up is inconceivable but we would like to be able to at least touch them sometimes. Our previous adopted bun (he was the love of my life) warmed up to us within a few weeks. Although he would never tolerate being picked up, we never forced the issue and loved our company and affection.

Or current buns are not timid and will nose us, jump on our backs, and circle us curiously if we are sitting still near them. They get excited when we announce it’s dinner time. They will gladly come to us if there are treats offered but will immediately scatter thereafter.

The dominant female will reprimand the male for coming close to us–or if we attempt to give him any attention–by chasing and biting him. They will quickly then go about an odd licking/head adjoining ritual thereafter, I assume to reassure one another that there was no breach of allegiance.

When I put my hand below the female’s nose, even at a fair distance, she will always lunge and bite me. I’ve tried wearing a glove and not recoiling but she remains extremely temperamental. The male is more docile, but is quick to dart when we reposition or get very close to him.

They do all the bonding things together and are affectionate to each other. Submission is frequently required of the male and he always acquiesces.

They aren’t afraid of us; it appears they simply don’t like us. Is there anything more we can do to enter their circle?

[Cinnimon&Ollie]

One of my bunnies won’t let you touch him, he runs for treats and jumps on us and all, it’s just the way he is. My other bunny only lets things on her terms and will lunge and nip if she doesn’t want to be pet, and forget about being picked up. My bunnies aren’t afraid of me, it’s just the way they are. You could maybe try hand feeding them part/or all of their meals. But also keep in mind it may just be the way they are. There are more ways of interacting with them than cuddles and pets, you could teach them tricks, or get a safe cat string wand ( don’t know what it’s called ). Some bunnies love the cat strings but others hate them and you have to use them carefully to avoid injures.

[snowstorm1996]

Thanks and, yes, I assumed they were just different but not necessarily indifferent. They do seem interested in us, just not interested in any physical touch. They will climb on us when we’re still and don’t seem to mind our company from afar at least. These rabbits don’t know how lucky they are. I suspect a lot of people would be disappointed so I’m glad we could give them a good, loving home.

[DanaNM]

Some bunnies take a verrrrryyy long time to warm up to their humans, especially if they’ve had a rough history. Forum leader Bam’s bunny (Bam) took I think over a year to decide he would like some nose rubs. Other members have reported that suddenly at 2 years their bunny decided they could be trusted.

I think you are doing all the right things, and the fact that they will climb all over you and accept hand feeding is great. Your pair actually sound a lot like this bonded pair of brothers I fostered, that had been orphaned as babies.

One thing I notice about your post is the female reprimanding the male for approaching you. Do they tend to have any food aggression when they get excited about treats? I’m wondering because one of my pairs does this, whenever they get overly excited about treats they will chase each other around for a bit. I’m curious as to if they always associate you with treats, so that could be what that behavior is. I noticed with my pair that if I relied too much on treats when interacting with them it made the behavior much worse. Now I spend a lot more time with them without food, and it seems to have made them less reactive in general.

So I would say just keep it up, but make sure to also spend lots of time with them that is not centered around food. And my best advice is to “play hard to get”. Basically stop trying to pet them at all, just hang out on the floor in the same room with them and watch a movie, read, mess around on your phone, etc. Since rabbits are prey animals, the feeling of being watched constantly puts them on edge.

It’s also true that some buns never become cuddle buns. Clicker training, food puzzles, and agility work are great ways to bond with buns that aren’t so interested in snuggles.

. . . The answers provided in this discussion are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet. Seek the advice of your veterinarian or a qualified behaviorist.  

[snowstorm1996]

This is a very thoughtful reply. Thank you! It has given me some hope that they may still mellow out in the years ahead. The food aggression happens if they’re expecting a treat and kept waiting. I think you’re correct: It’s probably a good idea to tone the treats down. Offering a treat (which is just a few food pellets or special lettuce) has to be done quickly and carefully with both hands going down at the same time or else Laurel will lash out and chase Acorn. Clicker training does look fun but it might instigate a tussle. I’m going to “play hard to get” a little more in the next few months.

Last night, Acorn (I call him my “Little Gumshoe” because of his adventurous and investigative spirit) hopped onto my lap in trying to get onto my desk. He was using me as a tool more than as a friend but I take it as a good sign that he’s not afraid of being so close to me.

[DanaNM]

It definitely sounds like they aren’t afraid of you, which is great! Laurel and Acorn are super cute names!

Another thing to be aware of with food aggression around treats is to make sure you aren’t unintentionally rewarding the chasing. I noticed I was doing this with my two: I would rush to put the food down to prevent them from bickering, and realized I was actually rewarding the bickering due to my timing! Now I just stand there with the food until they are calm (or at least not chasing each other), and then I put the food down. I may even decide not to give it to them if they are just being too crazy.

You could also always temporary separate (just for a few minutes at a time with a pen in their main area so they are still near each other) to do a bit of training and solo work with them if you’d like. I’ve had to do this anytime I give the buns flea meds, as they will try to groom it off of each other!

. . . The answers provided in this discussion are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet. Seek the advice of your veterinarian or a qualified behaviorist.  

[Lemski]

I have a bonded pair who are a little similar. I’ve had them about a year and a half. We had the female first, decided to adopted the male and bonded them (successful bonding with help of this forum!). Your post makes me feel better because I’ve been trying so hard to develop a relationship with them. My male is more interested in me then the female, never initiates head rubs or anything like that, but accepts them. The female won’t let me touch her and always has RRF (resting rabbit face 😂). I was hoping with time she would semi come around but she seems to be getting more withdraw. She always runs back in their enclosure and just stares at us after the treats are gone. We have food puzzles, cups and a mat to hide treats. I also sit with them daily and hand feed them to help with bonding but I don’t feel like we’ve come very far.

[snowstorm1996]

This sounds very familiar, especially the “RRF” you mentioned 😛 . She shoots us that annoyed look often. She’ll briefly tolerate a head rub or two only if there’s definitely something in it for her. She definitely things she’s the boss. I think as mod DanaHM mentioned above, playing harder to get might be a strategy. It may not be that she’s becoming more withdrawn as much as she’s learning that she can have her cake and eat it too by grabbing treats and getting away. I’m going to try fewer treats which will probably be harder on me in the short term since it’s only those fleeting moments when I feel like I have a connection with her. Acorn does seem to be mellowing out and it sounds like your boy will be more affectionate with time too.

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