Unable to care for rabbit due to depression

[Rainn]

Hello, I need some advice on what to do as a first time rabbit owner of three years. I’ve noticed that as I started growing more depressed my relationship with Rain has deteriorated accordingly. The first year and a half I had her I was meticulous in taking care of her…after that though, things have declined, and I’ve unintentionally become neglectful towards her. I first got her before any mental health issues I had were as obvious or causing dysfunction in my life. But now I’m constantly mentally and physically fatigued and hardly able to get out of bed, and it is especially impossible to do the bare minimum  tasks necessary for her to live a good life. My parents who do not take my fatigue issues seriously don’t do much, I don’t think they even can, so the poor rabbit is alone and suffering most of the time from neglect. She’s gotten sick multiple times this year and I’m 100% certain this is a consequence of me not taking better care of her. Unfortunately my symptoms aren’t going to change anytime soon….so I’ve been considering if it’s time for Rain to have a new home. Should I give her up to a good shelter or responsible person? I love her a lot, but on top of my fatigue issues I have so much anxiety about her death; so much to the point that I get drained and apathetic. Do any of you deal with the same thing, and if so do you have any advice on how to deal with this? I do not want her to suffer anymore but I also would be devastated to let her go.

Edited by LBJ – Removed some revealing info.

[LBJ10]

Before we discuss rehoming Rain… you said that you don’t see anything changing anytime soon. Are you able to see someone about your depression and anxiety?

[HipHopBunny]

Oh, I’m so sorry you’re going through this! <3

The pandemic has taken a huuuuuuge toll on all of us, so I have a lot of empathy right now. Know that it’s not just you going through this, that there are others experiencing the same things, that there are people who understand and can help you. 🙂 If you ever need someone to talk to, for advice, a shoulder to cry on, or even just a friend to spend time with, don’t hesitate to reach out!! We’re here for you!! <3

As for rehoming Rain, I don’t think that’s really the best option, for you or for her. She sounds like she has a wonderful life with you, and it’s evident that you care deeply about her. 🙂 We all go through phases, and I know that you’ll get through this. In the meantime, maybe you could try spending some more time with her. I actually find it very therapeutic and calming to spend time with my buns, so maybe this could help you both. 🙂

(((((((((((((((Good vibes)))))))))))))))

[Rainn]

Thank you both for the very kind and considerate responses. At the moment no, I do not have any chances of getting help for depression or anxiety, nor have I ever sought professional help. My parents are very much convinced that there is nothing mentally wrong with me and that it is an adolescent phase. It has been constant issues for 3ish years now, that have increasingly worsened because I am not getting help, and while the quarantine has probably mentally dampened everyone I think for me it has been a catalyst for all my mental issues. Thank you for the kindness HipHopBunny, you are probably very right that spending more time with Rain and will help, but unfortunately the heaping piles of guilt I feel for the way I’ve treated her kind of ironically keep me distant because I irrationally believe there is no fixing our friendship. Sorry if this post comes across as overexpressive, it’s just easier not to hide the extent of things I think, or else how can anyone provide direction for an issue that’s not well explained?

[LBJ10]

We certainly want to help you. I’m just concerned because rehoming Rain would not solve what you are going through. What I mean is, you feel guilty and feel like rehoming her would give her the life she deserves. That may or may not be true. My guess is that this neglect is probably not as bad as you perceive it to be. Is she safe? Is she fed? Does she receive vet care? Even if you don’t interact with her much, her situation could be much worse.

I’m just afraid that even if you did decide to rehome her, you would still be experiencing this depression and anxiety. Could you perhaps talk to a school councilor about how you feel? They may be able to make an assessment on whether or not you should seek professional help. If it came from someone else, then perhaps your parents would realize this isn’t some kind of phase.

[Bam]

I strongly support LBJs suggestion about talking to a school councilor, if that is an option available to you. Depression is a treatable condition, and it should be treated. As with practically all ailments, both of body and mind, the sooner you get treatment, the better.

 

 

[Wick & Fable]

School counselors are bound by confidentiality (with some exceptions, but they will state what those are), and they can be extremely supportive and also provide an avenue to getting additional support, if you’d like.

If you truly feel you’re unable to take care of Rain at this time, I think contacting your local HRS chapter would be wise, rather than a shelter. They can provide support and recommendations.

The answers provided in this discussion are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet. Seek the advice of your veterinarian or a qualified behaviorist.

[pinkiemarie]

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I’ve gone through serious bouts of depression as well and literally the only thing I was capable of doing at some points was feeding my cats and changing their box every few days. I didn’t have rabbits at the time. I’m sorry to hear that your parents are not taking you seriously because depression tends to get worse as you get older and if you’ve been suffering for 3 years it’s unlikely to get better without medical intervention and/or therapy. I have been on welbutrin for 8 years and it changed my life. I still have bad days and bad months but they’re far less severe and I’m much more capable of dealing with things. Depending on what country you are in and your exact age you may be able to seek assistance from a doctor on your own. If not I totally agree that you should speak to someone at school to see what help they might be able to provide.

As for your rabbit, I agree with the person above in asking if she is fed, does she always have water, is she allowed play time, and is her box cleaned regularly? If yes then try to show yourself more compassion because those are the things she needs, in addition to your unconditional devotion to her. Obviously you are devoted if you are worried about her, so give yourself permission to lie on the floor by her while she plays if that’s the most you can do right now.

 

[HipHopBunny]

I’m so sorry that you feel this way!! <3

I strongly believe that Rain has a great life with you. 🙂 The fact that you’re worried about her says sooooooo much.  And, please don’t feel guilty! I know that Rain doesn’t blame you in the slightest! We all have our times, and we’ll get through them together. 🙂

Maybe you could sit down with your parents and talk to them about how you’re feeling?

We’re always here for you!!

((((((((((((((((((Good vibes)))))))))))))))))))

[Rainn]

Thank you all for the responses and suggestions, I will definitely look into talking to a school counselor. As of now Rain does have a consistently safe environment and plenty of time to roam. The issue with her diet is that she refuses to eat hay of any kind and its starting to take a toll on her body I think. She’ll eat her veggies, pellets and treats but not hay. Her vet couldn’t  point to any obvious issues the last time she stopped eating at all, and gave pain meds plus some antibiotic. I remember one of the forum members saying it’s possible she needs an x ray for a root problem but the one person who can drive in my house is too busy to take her again. Today she has suddenly stopped eating again which is my immediate concern, she doesn’t want to touch anything or move around. It seems like maybe she is going into stasis which is strange because her poops were normal up until today, where there are some that are stuck together or large and misshapen. I’ve tried offering her anything that won’t cause harm, and she doesn’t respond beyond turning the other way. She was given gas drops earlier but I don’t think it helped. So i will be asking my parents to take her to the emergency clinic if she shows no sign of change within the next hour or so. Please give any and all suggestions, it is extremely stressful right now because I have one parent who’s too busy while the other is pushing me about homework while my rabbit is clearly sick.

[Rainn]

To add to that her stomach feels unusually hard on both sides and she keeps pressing her tummy to the ground. I want to try and get her to take gas drops but I’m worried if they can make it worse since she’s on an empty stomach?

[Wick & Fable]

I cannot think of a time gas drops have been harmful, so I think simethicone is worth trying.  Poops that are stuck together or mishapen — are they potentially influenced by fur? Is Rain shedding? Fur digestion can lead to stomach blockage, which can explain the discomfort and lack of appetite, in which case yes, the emergency vet is the best option, especially if she hasn’t eaten all day.

All the best that Rain recovers from today, and afterwards, we can definitely discuss ways to encourage hay eating! Many rabbits do not like hay as much as pellets and treats, so it’s not your fault she isn’t eating it– it could just be her preferences.

The answers provided in this discussion are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet. Seek the advice of your veterinarian or a qualified behaviorist.

[Rainn]

Alright thank you Wick, and yes she has been shedding especially around her face which I’ve been trying to keep clean as much as possible. She won’t take gas drops or pain meds from the syringe or on treats, so I’m wondering if like dabbing small amounts on her feet will get her to ingest some since she is still grooming herself? I know that’s probably gross for her but I will try using a little bit of water to rub the fur clean if I do this. I won’t do that if you guys think it’s harmful tho, just trying to find any way to get her to take them since none of us can hold her or anything.

[Wick & Fable]

If it’s a small amount it’s fine and she can’t groom herself.  I dont think itd be disruptive enough to need a water rub.

The answers provided in this discussion are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet. Seek the advice of your veterinarian or a qualified behaviorist.

[LBJ10]

Are you able to “sit” on her? That’s what I do when I only have 2 hands. You sit on your knees and place bunny between your legs. Tuck you feet in so they can’t wiggle backwards. This makes it much easier to hold their head and insert the syringe in their mouth.

[Rainn]

She’s too small and fast to pick up or do the sitting method with plus I’m too scared of hurting her to pull it off :/ She still has not eaten a crumb, it’s been more than 12 hours now. I’m not sure what to do because the rabbit clinic is closed. Shes gotten a few drips of the gas drops but not a full dose, and she drinks a little bit of water. She’s peed a few times and produced some stools which have been extremely small. She’s got enough energy to run away from food and meds and she also went upstairs in my room, but beyond that she just lays down and keeps changing positions and stuff. She will not let anything near her mouth.

[Bam]

It does sound like she could have a dental problem that causes her mouth to hurt. Dental problems can manifest very suddenly. If she wont eat anything, she does need a vet. (I know you know this). Standard treatment would be painkillers, sub q fluids, syringe feeding and likely a gut motility drug.

An ER vet might not do dental x rays, since she needs to be sedated for that and must be stable in order to be sedated.

We wouldbe very happy for updates 💗

 

 

[Rainn]

As of now she is pretty much in the same state :/ I did manage to surprise feed her some painkillers, and she started chewing a book and even ate like half of a treat (i have a buffet laid out in my room for her and thats the only thing she touched.) she is surprisingly strong for someone who hasn’t eaten real food the whole day :// Taking her anywhere is just not a possibility tonight but maybe in the morning. I’ll be staying up to make sure she’s hanging on.

[Bam]

Good job!

Fingers crossed she’ll start eating some more soon!

As you know, we are here, I’ll make sure to check in often!

Would she eat soaked pellets? Not all buns will (mine wont), but some buns  actually seem to like pellet mush.

[pinkiemarie]

It won’t do any good this second especially if you can get her to the vet but if she’s having reoccurring tummy problems it would be a good idea to get some critical care to keep on hand for emergencies. I’m not sure what kind of simethicone you have but if it’s not specifically the baby kind, maybe get some of that too.

 

You’re doing a great job taking care of her! She wouldn’t be so loved and cared for if she were in a shelter right now. Please keep us updated.

[Rainn]

Thank you both for the advice and support. Yes, the drops are specifically unflavored infant simethicone. I’m starting to wonder if maybe last time they were flavored which might explain why she liked them so much back then. I have not tried a pellet mash yet, i will make one of those today. And yes I will get my hands on some critical care for future emergencies. We got an appointment with the vet at 7 am tomorrow. I’ve read in some google search results that rolled oats might help if a rabbit is refusing to eat. I was wondering if these words actually hold any truth, since oats are considered fibrous?

[LBJ10]

Yes, flavored gas drops tend to be more palatable. Something to keep in mind for the future. I haven’t noticed any infant gas drops with xylitol, but that is one thing to always what out for. It isn’t safe for rabbits (or other animals).

Can you add a little something to the pellet mash to make it more appealing? A tiny bit of apple juice or unsweetened applesauce, for example.

[Rainn]

Hmm I tried pellet mash and adding tasty things with it but she won’t have anything. Luckily I successfully used her curiosity against her to get her into the carrier for her appointment so at least there’s that issue to not worry about. She’s still fairly lively, and drinking water. Plus she produced some cecotropes which i dont know if thats a good thing or not. But now it’s just watching over her until the vet appointment and hopefully things will be temporarily stabilized. Then i will immediately book another appointment for xrays and stuff so that the more deep rooted issues can be resolved. Thank you all for the help, it was very nice to have during all this stress.

[Rainn]

Update: Rain started eating some greens on her own randomly an hour ago!! (Throwing a tantrum after being tricked into her cage must have worked up an appetite haha.) I also managed to surprise her with more painkillers and she’s been munching on salad again >:) Just a few minor victories that hopefully mean things will be okay.

[Bam]

Oh, wonderful news! 😃🥰

[LBJ10]

I just wanted to check in. How is Rain doing? And how are YOU doing?

[Rainn]

Hello! Sorry I got caught up with things and forgot to send updates. The vet identified that Rain had mild G.I stasis, and I think whatever gut infection she had last time hadn’t fully gone away. I asked her about potential root issues because of the aversion to hay and she said she’s pretty certain that it had to do with the gut infection and not teeth. We’ve just got to work up her appetite for hay again by being more careful about pellets and stuff. We were told to try out Small Pet Select in case the Oxbow textures aren’t appealing to her. She’s doing so much better now thankfully, even more active than before she got sick. As for me it that week was a bit of a shock but I’ve discussed therapy with my parents who agree it could be useful. Thank you so much for checking in on both of us! And thanks again to everyone. I hope you are doing well too.

[LBJ10]

Thanks for the update! Glad to hear Rain is doing better. Hopefully she will like the new hay. And I’m glad to hear that your parents have agreed that therapy could be helpful to you. There is no shame in getting help and I think it will help you sort out the issues you have been having. I know Rain was causing you a lot of anxiety so hopefully you can better assess what to do once you are seeing a therapist. Good luck and keep us updated!

[DanaNM]

Glad things are going better and hopefully the new hay helps! I just had to get some oxbow timothy hay while we were moving (as opposed to the normal bale of hay I feed) and my buns all turned their noses up at it, although they do love the oxbow stacks so that got us through thankfully. They definitely can have strong opinions about hay!

 

. . . The answers provided in this discussion are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet. Seek the advice of your veterinarian or a qualified behaviorist.  

[BZOO]

Glad to hear things are looking up for both of you.

I was gonna say, in response to your initial post that animals bring happiness!😃

If you find yourself feeling down and having a hard time coping, set aside 10 minutes every day that you simply sit and pet her, if she’s a touchy feely bun, or just deep breathe and watch her be her silly self.  It’ll help a lot.

When I’m feeling down, my crew can always make me feel better.

[Author]

Messages