Time to stop bonding?

[tskelly93]

We got another rabbit to hold with our male after his last partner died unexpectedly at the start of April. Fast forward and bonding still doesn’t seem to be working. We have their cages in the same room, but not very close. We transfer their poo and bedding so they’re used to each other’s scent. When we let one out and the other is still in their cage they no longer attack eachother through the cage, so I thought this was a good sign and decided to restart their daily bonding sessions in a neutral space (the bathroom). However it seems like things are going from bad to worse in there. My new bun is too terrified to move in the room, and my male has become really stressed in there, stamping his feet and trying to go for the door. The first bonding session saw my male mount her for a few seconds but that has been the only ‘bonding’ behaviour we’ve seen. There’s been no grooming or mounting, just my male stamping his feet and grunting when she comes near. We thought maybe the hallway would be good as its carpeted (males arthritic, bsthroom is lino so thought it might be better for him) but the stomping and grunting has continued and now the female will lunge and bite him (we split them if we see this, as it usually escalates into full blown fighting) I’m not sure if this means that they have no interest in being friends at all? Or if I should persevere, maybe change something. I’ve never tried to bond buns so not sure if I’m doing something wrong. Was gunna give them teddies with eachothers scent on them but they’re both chewers so dont trust them

[DanaNM]

Hi there, a couple things that might be helpful. How long have you been doing actual bonding sessions? Also, assuming both are spayed/neutered?

– For pre-bonding, I recommend full cage swaps, rather than just bedding. Keep this up even when you’re doing bonding sessions.
– Try a car ride in a bin together. Have a helper drive, you sit in the back seat and make sure they don’t fight. Pet them heavily and swap scents, press them down if they try to fight. (wear heavy leather gloves or oven mits).
– Try a new location. A larger space is usually better (like two x-pens linked up together), the more neutral the better. A friend’s house or garage can be wonderful. You can add treats and hay everywhere, and at least 2 hiding spots with at least 2 exits, so no one gets cornered. Since your male is very scared, he might be more calm if he has a place to hide.
– Whenever they approach each other, pet them lots to build a calm and positive association. If lunging leads to fighting, start petting when you see her about to lunge, do NOT let them fight. Since you have been splitting them up when the female lunges and bites, they have been learning that fighting is the way to make the other bunny go away. You need to work to build trust between them. So, anytime the approach, pet them both and swap scents.
– Set short time goals, so you always end on a positive note, even if that means you are petting them both.

It doesn’t sound hopeless! A lot of bonding is about trying different things until you hit on something that works for your bunnies. Patience and perseverance!

. . . The answers provided in this discussion are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet. Seek the advice of your veterinarian or a qualified behaviorist.  

[tskelly93]

Hi, both buns are neutered. initially I did bonding sessions for about 3 weeks. We had to stop as my males (Chaos) arthritis wasn’t being managed by meds. He seemed to be on guard as he knew he couldn’t defend himself without causing further pain. The first lot of sessions were pretty bad, he got badly bit and scratched everytime (even lost a toe nail) and you could tell he was in alot of pain. We’ve got him on a better medication routine so that’s when we decided to restart bonding sessions as the specialist we saw said pain is one of the big reasons for failed bonding (so restarted round a month and a half now). When we weren’t doing the daily bonding sessions they were kept in the same room, with bedding/litter/fur switches and allowed to roam about the same room while the other was in their cage.

Chaos doesn’t really have many things in his cage to switch. We’ve been switching toys, but neither are really interested in them anyways so not sure if it’s their general not bothered about toys response or ignoring them as they smell of the other bun. We’ve left boxes about for them to dewlap and play with which I think he’s been working. Chaos loves finding them smelling it and giving it a little chin. He prefers to use his litter tray as his bed, he has a proper bed but loves chewing it so I tend not to leave it in unless someone’s in the room.

I was thinking about moving the sessions into a pen in my room, but my only concern is it’s where I first settled Nachos into my flat for like a week so I think she might see it as hers? I’m going to hoover the floor like mad before I try it to be safe and rearrange some furniture so it’s not too familiar. I’ll try petting, seems like a good deterrent method. I didn’t fancy spraying them every time they fought as were still trying to get Nachos to bond to us aswell (she’s really shy, not keen on being handled) so it might help us bond with her aswell.

And i’ve decided to finally bite the bullet and move their cages right beside each other (small gap to prevent injury) so hoping it makes them more comfortable with the other and brings some positive interaction. I’m going to try and feed them beside each other as they’re both food motivated, so it might reassure them that it’s safe to be round the other. I just wasn’t sure if the continual aggression was a sign that they weren’t going to be friends in the long run. I read that if bonding sessions continually had aggression, and disapproval of the other bun they would more than likely fail which was worrying me. I wouldn’t get rid of Nachos but I would need to alter my current set up

[DanaNM]

The fighting early on likely set them back as bunnies definitely hold grudges. How long did you break for after that? Since there was a pretty bad bite, it would be good to completely separate for several weeks (some recommend as long as 3 months), to allow them to forget each other. I don’t doubt that Chaos’s health was also at play. If he continues to be in pain, he may have trouble bonding with any bun. Bonding as about buns learning to trust one another, and a bunny in pain will have a hard time with this, as they will always be on guard, as you say.

That said, I do think the petting technique could really help. A lot of people also use the “smoosh” in situations like this. You place the buns side by side, and pet them constantly until they relax. This is often a good way to start an end a session, and might be a nice way to assess whether you want to continue.

I’d be reluctant to use the room… if you do, you can try covering the floor with a tarp or piece of linoleum to try to block familiar smells. You can also sprinkle baking soda on the carpet before you vacuum. Personally, I would try something completely different, like a friend’s house, a backyard, or a garage.

Housing side by side and feeding side by side are really helpful. Since they have a history for fighting, and you haven’t done this step yet, I would go back to just living side by side for 3-4 weeks. Swap who is on what side every other day or so (or at least swap litter trays), and feed at the same time. More prebonding can work wonders when things have a rough start.

. . . The answers provided in this discussion are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet. Seek the advice of your veterinarian or a qualified behaviorist.  

[tskelly93]

We paused bonding for 3 weeks while we got his medication sorted. I’ll try the ‘smooshing’to start and end aswell as petting and see if that helps. If not I’ll seperate them again and start again. Thanks for your advice

[BeanMode]

I’m by no means experienced in bonding but the side by side housing made a huge impact in my buns. My male was also nervous to start and after moving in side by side his confidence improved ten fold. It was a quick change for us but he also didn’t have a bad experience, so it might take longer for Chaos. Best of luck <3

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