This is a little complicated situation…

[bunbound]

  I just introduced a new rabbit to bond with my current and while it’s only a few days into the process the speed date was great and they seem like good candidates so far. Here’s my problem, I’ve been diagnosed with bipolar and borderline disorder a long with a heap of anxiety. For some reason ever since I got the new bun in the home I can’t stop crying and feeling stress like something is wrong. New things seem to set me off and unsettle me (pets, change, vacation ), I’m telling myself over and over this will get better but at what point if it DOESN’T get better do I do something? The shelter was extremely nice and said that I could return the bun if anything wasn’t working out and they want forever homes for them. I want it to work but if I can’t for some reason cope with this new situation that I thought I was so excited for. I’m so scared to be judged negatively if I did give the bun back. I take well care of them, hours of time out free roaming my room, quality pellets, greens, and hay. I for some reason could handle one bun but a second seems like it crashed my world down…I feel terrible to the point of thinking over quitting life on and off and I’m a wreck.

  I’m pushing myself to wait for this unbalanced feeling to balance again and I’ll be happy but I don’t know when I should say no more if it doesn’t fit. I feel so ashamed even writing this post but I want the best for them both and the one adopty deserves a owner who can handle him or herself, while I can provide the care needed I feel I’m dying myself on the inside. What would I even say to the shelter if I brought the bun back and explain my situation?

[Baxter n Boos Mom]

Your first priority is to your own health. Anyone here who has bonded bunnies knows that it can be a very stressful situation for people and bunnies. If this is not a good time for you – do not feel bad, and focus on getting yourself to a healthy balance first.

[Jesse97]

I agree with Baxter n Boo. The humans health always comes first
If you really don’t think you can cope with the situation, then don’t fell bad about it.
When I was bonding my buns I was very overwhelmed and had those same feelings. Maybe not as extreme as you but I had a lot of anxiety and felt very overwhelmed but it did get better. If you don’t think you can do it, then don’t feel bad but the result of seeing your bunnies bonded is very rewarding. Maybe if you got someone to help you it might be easier?

[Beka27]

The way I see it, you have a few options. They might or might not work for you, but just throwing them out there…

1) Will the rescue do the “heavy” bonding work and return them to you “pre-bonded” so you can just finish it up? This would require giving them both up for about 2 weeks.

2) Can you keep them both separate for awhile longer? Wait until you’re feeling better? There are bonding exercises you can do without the buns ever meeting face to face. You can exchange litterboxes or bunnies each day to switch up the scent in their habitats, or you can give each a bunny “stunt double” that smells like the other.

3) If you move ahead with bonding now, do you have a buddy who could help? Even if they’re not a rabbit person, there are great articles about bonding and bunny body language that they could read, and then you could go through this with some “back-up”.

I have a similar reaction with new pets. For the first week, it’s the biggest mistake ever… but it gets better as I get more attached. Maybe that’s the 4th option. Try and develop a relationship with the new bunny before bonding. Once you’re bonded to them both, you’ll be more determined to make it work.

Bonding should be done everyday for quickest results, but do what you can do. If you can only do every other day, or a couple times a week, no one is going to judge your commitment.

[Author]

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