Stuck in a rut with bonding

[skibunny8503]

OK so I had decided to bond our rabbits.  A little background on mine since I haven’t been on here in some time.  I originally had 3 rabbits, 2 bonded (Archie & Gracie) and one lone rabbit (Sandy).  I tried my hand at bonding all 3 but Gracie had it in for Sandy from the beginning so that didn’t work out.  Gracie was older and had to be sent to the Rainbow Bridge in Jan. of 2012.  So they had enough time next to each other (their cages are next to each other BTW) and got used to each other.  So we decided to try to bond them again because I think the main thing was Gracie’s scent on Archie. 

I’ve been trying to bond them for about a week or so (it’s been rough, we have a 1 year old and sometimes I’m just to exhausted to bond them at the end of the day).  The most they’ve gone without being bonded was 2 days and when I tried to bond them they took a step backwards.  But for the most part they get along great!  Sandy was a bit nippy at Archie at first and very jumpy when he got near her side or rear.  She refused to groom him.  But after tricking her by putting her head on his and scratching behind her ear (she always licks my hand when I do that to her), she finally got used to it and grooms him by herself now.  But he refuses to groom her, shoves his head under hers every chance he gets.  I think he just wants attention (he always groomed Gracie and she hardly did it back).  He grunts a lot to and tries to hump her.  I stop him (I let him go one time but that didn’t work out well for them) and tell him no.  

So I’ve just been kind of stuck right there.  She’s ok with him for the most part (as long as he doesn’t try to hump her) but I can’t him to groom her and not grunt and try to hump her.  So any advice would be greatly appreciated!

[tanlover14]

It’s not essential for him to groom her back – does this seem to be a problem between the two? Is she demanding grooms and he’s just not doing it? Or doesn’t she mind? If she doesn’t mind, then there’s really not an issue there.

What exactly happens when he tries to hump her? Does she run and hide? Or does it escalate into fighting? They really sound like they are doing well for only having been bonding for a week – I don’t think you’re really “stuck” as it hasn’t been very long! I only wonder what happens when he humps because taking him off her every time may be whats making it difficult for them to establish a pecking order.

[tanlover14]

At some point they NEED to establish their pecking order so they can fully bond so you WANT them to have these dominance battles as long as they aren’t breaking out in fights. If so, then stress them out a little and get them to become closer to help make the dominance battles less aggressive when they do happen.

[jerseygirl]

Absolutely. You do need to let some things happen otherwise they won’t move past that point.

If they’re locking teeth and spinning fast in a circle, you’ll need to break it up. But if its a bit of growling, nipping or pulling fur from the butt, this won’t hurt them.

Where are you doing the bonding sessions with them?

[tanlover14]

Not sure if this will help, but I let them do a lot of beginning bonding in a box. I set them in there for long periods of time and whenever they would start getting rowdy to the point of being VERY aggressive, I would shake the box and scare them. Which would immediately stop since they’d be freaked out. It helped I think because Simba always saw me as his “rescuer” and knew I would always come to his rescue to “save” him from the other bunnies. Which you don’t really want because they begin to expect it and it does nothing for helping to establish their order together. I’ve really learned that you want to keep yourself OUT of the bonding process as much as possible. It always made bonding mine go by a lot faster as they realized they HAD to figure it out. And they did. You should only be there to break up problems that are going to escalate into something harmful to either bunnies.

[Sarita]

Yeah, I’m never sure why people think that grooming equates bonded or bonding – it is not necessarily so. I’ve had bonded pairs that never groom – bonding is a matter of trust and the rabbits feeling comfortable around each other and that doesn’t necessarily mean grooming so you don’t need to force that.

[skibunny8503]

Thanks for the help guys!   I tried bonding them 2 days ago but my son was in his exersaucer and started having a fit so had to cut it short.  Yesterday I wasn’t home and today I’m just exhausted but I’ll be back at it tomorrow for sure…I hope haha!  
I bond them right outside their cages.  Their cages are right next to each other (with about a foot between so they don’t touch).  They have about maybe 4ftx4ft space to run around and I’m actually in there when I bond them.  But next time I think I’ll do something different so I’m not right by them all the time.  Sandy did keep following me last time.  But for the most part they hop around and don’t really mind each other.  It’s just when Archie runs up by her that she tenses up.  Next time he tries to mount her I’ll let him do his thing without touching them.  Before I would pet Sandy so that maybe he could get it out of his system but that didn’t work.  I’ll keep you guys updated on how it goes next time.

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