So confused – seem bonded, and yet not

[Mrs. Bob Loblaw]

My bunnies were bonded before, but got into a fight when my mother in-law spent the night on the couch in their territory. We figure the fight started because they didn’t accept a semi-stranger in their area without their mom and dad around.

 After staples and recovery time, they seem to have bonded again. They groom each other, they cuddle, they share hay, and they seem to get along really well. It’s been like this for around 6 weeks, where they spend 5-7 hours together at night. But last week, there was a chasing incident. Jafar really likes to sniff Zero’s butt, but Zero hates it. A chase happened as a result (we think). We broke it up and they were okay again, and acted like they normally do. Last night, we were going to let them stay with each other overnight, but a couple hours before bed, they got in a fight. A roll around on the floor with their eyes shut kind of fight. The vicious, protective, scary bunny kind of fight. We broke it up really quickly, gave them an hour apart, and then let them spend another hour together. Today, they’ve been together for 14 hours with no fighting and one minor chasing. We’re really confused by their behavior. Can we ever trust them? We’re now planning to wait until at least May to try an overnighter. But the cost of recovery surgery, hearthache, and worry are too much. Do some bunnies bond, but only want to be with each other under constant supervision? How can I understand my bunnies?

[RabbitPam]

I think you are making progress, but bonding can be painfully slow with a two steps forward, one step back kind of progress.
It is probably going to take longer than you’d like to get them bonded well enough to stay overnight, but it does sound very likely. I would suggest reading some of the other bonding posts to learn about what others have gone through. Also, look for posts that say things like “finally!” or something like that. The ones that have taken a while. They may have tips in them for you to try to help it along.
I would take heart.
It sounds like it will happen.

[tanlover14]

I’m a pretty firm believer if you stick with it long enough – your bunnies will bond.

Bunnies are strange. And the smallest things can really set them off on each other. Especially during the bonding process. Bonding is a LONG, usually painful (for us and sometimes the buns) process. But keep your head up and keep trucking through.

As RabbitPam said, sift around on the site for other bonding posts. Keep up your confidence and take the small victories.

What exactly are their behaviors towards each other? Could you possibly post a video if you can catch them in action annoying each other? Many a time during bonding I would think it was going great and then someone would do something that would set the group back like five steps. It’s really frustrating but if you figure out what is causing the scuffles between the two (buns haven’t figured out pecking order, someone is being territorial over something, ect) it may help you figure out how to fully bond.

[Mrs. Bob Loblaw]

Sorry for the delay in getting back to this thread. I’m 35, but I returned to college and have been student teaching and getting ready to graduate. My time has been sucked up more than I could imagine.

I don’t have any videos of them, just some sweet photos I’ll post at some point. They spend hours together every night and even more time together during the weekends. Almost entirely without incident. In fact, the last scary chase was when I made my original post. Jafar can be clingy and sometimes Zero gets annoyed by it. She really gets upset when he tries to sniff her butt and we think that is the main thing that sets them off. He’ll sniff her butt, she hops away, he hops after her and sniffs her butt some more, a chase ensues.

I just find it so hard to figure out when they are truly bonded and not mostly-bonded. We had gone weeks without a problem and had chosen the day of their last chase-fight to be their first night sleeping together. We got so lucky the fight happened while we were still awake. I’ll look up some “Finally” threads – thanks for that idea! We’ve decided we’re waiting until at least May, if not June, to try again. And we’re only doing that if there are no fights between now and then. I’ll also keep my camera handy to try and catch the butt-sniffing problem.

[Mrs. Bob Loblaw]

The big sleepover date has been postponed indefinitely. They have been SO CLOSE all week. So much grooming, they were always laying nose to nose, we haven’t seen a hint of a problem. This morning, we put them together and they immediately got into a huge fight. They didn’t last 1 second together, so we have no idea what cause the problem. We think something must have happened between them overnight, when they were apart. The weather changed and it’s suddenly hotter. That’s the only change that has happened lately. No idea what to pin this one on. I’m just glad they decided to fight right away, rather than when we were cooking or out of the room for a few minutes.

Square one.

[tanlover14]

The thing to do in a situation like the one you just said is to stress bond them immediately. If they know they can fight to get the other one away – they will. It will be like rewarding them for their behavior. They get into a scuffle and they KNOW they will get what they want (the other bunny out of their sight). NEVER NEVER NEVER put them away after a fight.

It’s okay if you did this time – as I mean you may have not realized. They have to realize it’s not acceptable behavior and by stressing them out together they will figure out that fighting is not the key to getting what they want.

[tanlover14]

I really think you’re problem is not enough stress bonding. You have to get them over the annoyances with each other. Like humans they WILL get annoyed about the small stuff. I used to put mine in a huge box. And every time one would do something that annoyed the other, I would let it go until they started getting REALLY annoyed – then I would shake the box. It always made them start back at Square One with annoying the other one.

If they are fighting like this – they really have not gotten to the point where they trust the other bunny. Stress Stress Stress. Every time they are together. Don’t let them have big areas together. Just go through a couple of weeks of no play time together. Simply stress bonding.

[Mrs. Bob Loblaw]

Thank you so much for the input. We have no idea what happened, but they seem to hate each other right now. Or rather, Jafar (the boy) hates Zero (the girl). They’re both fixed and were in LOVE just 3 days ago. No idea what happened, but neither has a single scratch on them, so I’m happy about that. We just put them together again and Jafar immediately tried to attack. We put down some fresh hay and they calmed down and are okay with each other.. for now.

We’ll start stress bonding tomorrow and we’ll do that if they have any future fights. Usually if they have a fight, I get them to settle side by side and I pet their heads so it feels like they’re being groomed. Clearly, that’s not enough.

Thanks again for the help – I’ll keep everyone updated! I feel like it’ll be a miracle if they bond for good, but I’ll keep trying until we succeed.

[Bwbedard]

I would try some stress bonding techniques. I had a very similar problem bonding my two and I had almost given up. They would get along great for hours and without warning would start fighting. After a few trips around the house in a laundry basket they seemed a lot more willing to work together.

Any time I had to separate them I would put them beside one another and pet them or feed them some goodies so they started associating the good stuff with the other bun. That being said I had both of them for nearly 2 years before they could finally share a pen overnight.

[Author]

Messages