Nine months later and I cry in my cubicle

[Adam]

Her last days, as I looked for something that might help: https://binkybunny.com/forums/topic/rabbit-has-fluid-around-lungs-looking-for-treatment-options/

Doesn’t help that I have a couple pictures of her to look at every day, but I won’t forget her, she deserves to be remembered.  My brain though, once it goes down these tracks it just won’t stop until it has destroyed my soul for the day.

I think about all the things she did with her sassy behavior that I’ll miss, her funny oinks of disapproval, her loud tooth purring, she just had a big personality. Sometimes out of nowhere she would thump and run for cover and refuse to come out, giving another thump or two. I never could figure out what scared her, or if it was a bout of anxiety like her daddy sometimes gets, but I would comfort her and appeal to her never-ending appetite to get her through it.

And unfortunately I also think a lot about the last two days of her life. The mistakes I made, the questions unanswered, the fact that she lived for 9 years never making any sound but those above until her last hour, I wish I could unhear it, and I’m just so broken now.

[LBJ10]

Hi Adam! I remember your bunny and I’m very sorry for your loss. It’s important to focus on the 9 years she had with you. She was loved and well taken care of. Don’t let a couple of days, where you were still trying your best given the circumstances, cloud all the wonderful years you had with her. We all think we could have done things differently. But, at the end of the day, doing things differently may not have lead to a different outcome. Sometimes there just isn’t anything we can do.

[Author]

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