Hey all, I just wanted to share something with you that has changed my life in the course of 1 week. At my co-workers persistence I took a self-defense class last Tuesday. I have always been a magnet for jerks and subjected to numerous bozos on the street and one even tried to approach me with a knife. The course I took is called FAST Defense by Bill Kipp and you actually go through real-life scenarios and you learn techniques on how to handle verbal confrontation and as a last resort, physical defense. Never did I think I would need to use it, boy was I wrong.
Now, I don’t want this to sound like some cheezy plug because it is not. But just this last Saturday I needed to use it, I was scared to crap, but I also hate to think what would have happened had I not taken the course and known exactly what to do. Here is a small summary of what happened, please note that this is a letter that I sent to the instructor, Bill Kipp.
I want to thank you for the FAST Defense training, it was invaluable and I now know how not to be a victim. I have had some incidents in the past with individuals who were less than well meaning and would not leave me alone (Sometimes I feel like a jerk magnet) and I suppose this is not an uncommon story amongst women whom take your course. Well, I have a new chapter to add, but it went much better than it has in the past, thanks to both the dedication of yourself and Chris and everyone who has made FAST Defense training possible.”
This past Saturday I needed to employ the verbal defense training that you gave us. I was walking out of a sporting event. It was just my mother and I, and we were walking in a sparse crowd to the car. We were walking our usual pace when I heard a man shout come-on line “Hey, Ladies, how did you like the game?” in a leering manner. We kept walking however I remained alert, no sure to whom he was speaking (this man was clearly drunk) then he shouted “Hey I’m not leaving you alone until you talk to me!” in an extremely brutal manner. Two girls behind me gasped and ran, afraid of him. I turned around and hollered “What do you want?” with my hands up as you had taught us. He returned with and even more brutal voice that “I’LL TELL YOU WHAT I WANT. WHAT I WANT IS TO TALK TO THAT WOMAN NEXT TO YOU!” He was talking about my mother, I felt the adrenaline in my chest but I stood my ground. I told him “No, she doesn’t want to and all we want to do is pass thorough and go home.” he then came loping up and I yelled at him to “stay back.” He did and shirked away from me guarding his face (he was clearly drunk). My mother then turned around and recognized him as someone vaguely familiar from work. They exchanged greetings. Even though my mother knew him, I kept my distance as his intentions were not clear. An introduction was forced and he got in my face (still keeping his distance away from me as I kept my hands up and feet poised) and he then told me I better “watch” myself because I could get hurt, I told him I can take care of myself and he should not speak to people like that and there are better ways, especially when you know the person and he should not employ such a threatening manner. He apologized for his behavior and backed off to continue a conversation with my mother (I put my hands down slightly but kept my stance) and she explained to him that I took a self-defense course, he mocked at me and I said that is not appropriate behavior and he stopped but continued to keep his distance and eyed me to make sure I didn’t come towards him. I kept my personal space, he continued a small conversation with my mother and he went on to say how brutal and rude I was, I said “Good, I do not like you and I want you to leave.” He said “Damn you’re brutal.” He took the hint though and the conversation with my mother ended shortly, he then turned to me (I put my hands up) and he had the nerve to ask me to hang out with him and I told him “NO, LEAVE NOW” and I stepped towards him. He started and then began to stagger away and kept repeating how rude and brutal I am and that my mother should “do something about me” however my mother returned by saying “Why? She is just protecting herself.” We looked at each other and stated what a jerk he was and continued on our way.
In all it seems like this incident went on forever but was probably only 5 minutes total. I want to tell you that this would not have gone like this before my FAST defense training, I would have fallen victim to his advances and apologized for my “rude” behavior, letting him be in control and just taken his verbal abuse. But that is not what happened, I took a stand for myself and I feel like I am in control now, I do not feel like a victim, I do not act like a victim and I do not have to tolerate being treated poorly and I can stick up for myself. In short, I am de-magnetizing myself as a jerk magnet and never has it felt better. My life is changing for the better thanks to just a one-day course and yes, I do plan on taking more courses from you.
Now that you have read that, I have to say that normally I would have totally frozen from fear. I do want to say this has seriously changed my life for the better, not only do I feel more confident, I can look people in the eye and most of all I refuse to be a victim and I know it is O.K. to not be nice. I know it sounds silly, but it is the honest to god truth. Throughout life many of us are told to be polite, nice and feminine and to go along with whatever a guy puts us through. Fear can paralyze you and you fall victim to them. Whatever your past, I hope that you all take care of yourselves and please do consider taking a self-defense course. You can read more about it on http://www.fast.defense.com. The classes are taught both nationally and internationally. It was the most intense 3 1/2 hours and it brought back a lot of bad memories which I have now made peace with and if anything ever happens again, I know what to do and I don’t have to take it.
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I’d better take the class!! 
