My bunny’s tragic death

[DarwinForever]

I suppose I’m posting here for a few reasons…

1 – because I’m devastated and can’t think about anything else at the moment

2 – because I feel guilty about my bunny’s death

3 – I have questions/concerns about what happened and what I might be able to do in the future if I ever decide to get a bunny again

 

My sweet holland lop, Darwin, passed away very suddenly the other night after my dog went after him.  Before anyone jumps on my case, please know that first of all, I already deeply regret putting them together like I did, and that I only did so because they have been peacefully co-existing for the last 7 months since I got Darwin. 

I was staying at my mom’s house because I was having some electricity issues at home (our main connection burned up and nearly started a fire), so I had the bunny set up in the back room.  My mom has a large mastiff dog that I wasn’t sure about around the rabbit and that likes to eat my two dogs food when I feed them.  So during feeding times for the bunny and the dogs, I fed them in the bedroom together.  Normally Darwin had basically free-roam of our house, and he and the dogs have always been completely fine with each other.  I wanted to leave Darwin’s cage door open for awhile because I felt bad that he had been locked in the cage for basically two days.  He truly hated being locked in there (I had to bribe him with snacks to get him to go in there at night for bed). 

 Anyway, I made the mistake of leaving the room thinking that everything would be just fine for a short period of time while they ate their dinners.  Just moments before I was about to go into the room and let the dogs out, I heard my one dog visciously barking/growling, and I ran in to find my bunny bolting across the room into his crate.  I immediately checked his body for any bite wounds, broken limbs, etc. and I couldn’t find anything wrong, but then he suddenly flopped to his side and began gasping for breath and he died within seconds. 

 I obviously feel completely responsible for it and I hate myself for it and that makes the entire thing a million times harder than it already would have been if I wasn’t at fault. And, I’m also completely in shock by it and wondering what exactly happened…was it it a heart attack from fear?  It happened so suddenly that I didn’t even have any time to take him to the pet ER or anything.  And like I said, as far as I could tell, there were no wounds —  although I can’t say for sure, I believe that she went after him, but did not actually bite him.

 My main question I guess… is does a fright-induced heart attack sound likely?  And other than preventing the incident from happening in the first place by not trusting them alone together, was there anything I could have done when it had happened to possibly save my bunny’s life? It happened so fast, and I didn’t have time to even assess what was happening with him. 

 I didn’t really know that bunnies could die from fright prior to this; I only discovered it after reading and reading and reading after it had happened looking for answers. 

 I’ve read that bunnies can die from loud sounds or just about anything that scares them enough — and although I obviously will NEVER get a rabbit as long as I have my dogs again, I’m kind of nervous about ever considering adopting a bunny in the future if I no longer have dogs.  It makes me so nervous to think that they can pass away so unexpectedly and so easily.  I know that it’s probably not super common and that ANY pet can pass away unexpectedly for a variety of reasons….

but with how sensitive and fragile bunnies are, it really freaks me out to consider ever owning a bunny again (when I don’t have dogs).  I would love to have a bunny/bunnies again, because loving Darwin was like no other pet I’ve ever had.  I can’t even explain it.  He was so special to me and I was totally in love with him from the get go. 

 

Again, I know I messed up big time and I am super depressed and hate myself for it already, so please when responding, understand that I don’t need a lecture.  I obviously know what I did wrong and would never do it again.  I’ll never even ATTEMPT to have bunnies and dogs together again even if it’s technically possible to do it with a lot of caution.  Any and all information about what might have happened to cause his death, what I maybe could have done, and any information about how common it is for bunnies to die in this way would be appreciated.  If anyone has any similar experiences, too, I would really appreciate hearing about it because I’m feeling super shocked and devastated and angry with myself. 

 

Thank you

[Gordo and Janice]

I’m sorry for everyone involved. Very unfortunate. You’ve learned one of those ultimate lessons the hardest way. As to why your bunny died it’s literally impossible to say exactly. All it takes is one crush of the mouth of a dog and the internal injuries could be devastating and ultimately fatal without the skin being broken and blood being evident. It could have been heart attack only from immense fear.  Or it could have been a fatal crushing or rupturing or damage in general of internal organs and or blood vasculature from being attacked. And it could have been a combination of both, the trauma of being attacked and the associated pain and internal damage all causing too much stress and fright leading to the heart attack. No way of knowing. It’s just a shame.

Binky free {{{Darwin}}}

[Phil]

You said it tragic, I would think your bunny died from a massive shock, definitely a heart attack, never let a dog anywhere near them. Remember bunnies are a prey animal, you learned the hard way, very sad and tragic.

[DarwinForever]

Thanks for the response and info.

I have never felt worse about myself and the past three days have been hell for me.  I would give anything to just go back in time and do it all differently.  I miss him so much, and I hate walking into the bedroom and his cage not being in there, and rolling over in the morning and not seeing him there.  My heart has never been so broken and I honestly just don’t know what to do with myself right now. I feel so much guilt and I wish my moment of idiocy didn’t cost him his whole life.  I just can’t forgive myself for it.  My husband has been trying to tell me it’s not my fault, because we all trusted the dogs and thought that they were just fine together, but his words really mean nothing to me; I know the truth — that dogs and a bunny should never be left alone no matter how much it might seem that they can co-exist together.  I wish I wouldn’t have been so stupid.

[Bunny House]

I’m sorry for your loss, that must have been horrible to witness. And yes, you learned the hard way, one of the biggest things that can happen to bunnies.
I would say if you feel like you want to get another bun, to do a lot of research online, you can ask us questions but make sure you do all you can to learn. But remember, you didn’t know any better in that situation-yes it was horrible and shouldn’t have happened but now you know not to do it again. You can always have a vet do a necropsy to see the exact cause of death. Bunnies are very fragile and sensitive to a lot of stuff which can make us change our daily lives.
The only thing you could have done was to not let them be free in the same area. And it is common for a bunny to die from shock if they are scared or stressed enough, even if your bun wasn’t loose, the dog could have barked and caused it to have a heart attack. Just like G&J said, it could have been grabbed by a dog and had its organs puncture and lead to a bleed out, but you have no idea.

[DarwinForever]

 Thank you for your words and information.

I’m not sure I would have gotten a bunny while having dogs if I would have known that they can die from fright.  I wouldn’t have gotten a bunny while having dogs, period, if I knew then what I know now.  Before I got him, I had seen all these stories and videos online of dogs and bunnies co-existing — bunnies curled up next to a dog just like they’re best friends.

I would never even take my chances of mixing the two species again no matter what precautions were taken. I know some people do it and have not had issues, but I just would never take my chances again. 

My husband and I both had much more faith in our dogs than we should have, obviously. (we both had a discussion after this about how we need to make a point to keep remembering that they are DOGS, because we both look at them simply as friends and family members and tend to overlook and forget their natural tendencies at times; we agreed that it’s important to always remember that no matter how much we may think we can trust them, they can act in unpredictable ways at any time). They always did so well with him, so we were never concerned.  We would be lying on the couch with the dogs and the bunny would hop right up there with us and get right near (and even hop ON) the dogs without there ever being any issue. Darwin was never afraid of them. 

I just wish I could go back and redo everything.

[Bunny House]

I was going to say exactly what you said, they aren’t humans and we can’t tell them how to act with whoever. They are animals and they will act like animals not matter what.
Yes it was horrible what happened but you may adopt a bunny in the future that his spirit is in and he may be reborn and you may get a chance to redo it with him. At least you can find some peace in your heart that he probably didn’t have a painful death as it was fast so he didn’t suffer too long.
It’s always hard but try not to beat yourself up for it. It was a mistake you made but now you can know you won’t make that mistake again if you get another bun. It’s hard, but we are here for you and don’t want to be hard on you for what happened. Animals are here to teach us certain lessons to everyone, unfortunately you got a sad lesson

[DarwinForever]

Bunny House, I really appreciate your gentle words.  I just love him so much and tried to give him the best life I could, and yet I made a mistake that cost him his life.  It’s just very hard to know that.  I am very embarrassed by the poor choice I made and it was very hard writing this post.  Any pet’s death is hard regardless of the cause, but knowing that a poor decision made led to it is like nothing I’ve ever experienced before.  I know that all I can do now is take what I learned and never let the same mistake happen again, but it doesn’t bring my Darwin back and that is the hardest part. 

Thank you again for taking the time out to respond and for being so kind.  It really means a lot. 

[Bunny House]

Of course, no problem. Everyone makes mistakes. And you tried to give him the best life you could and you seem to be such a caring person it must hurt but you did what you could. It was his time to go, despite the circumstance, you couldn’t change it, it wa meant to be.
We are here for you if you need any other help or have any other questions

[Phil]

This is so sad, its strange how your dog went for Darwin if they got on OK, just a very unfortunate mistake, very sad.

[DarwinForever]

Posted By Phil on 7/16/2018 4:49 AM

This is so sad, its strange how your dog went for Darwin if they got on OK, just a very unfortunate mistake, very sad.

It is strange, but looking back and trying to figure out what might have happened, I think the fact that we were in a different environment may have been a contributing factor and my husband has been on a trip, so it’s possible that the stress of being in a different home and wondering where my husband is might have caused her to act differently.  I don’t know.  There are all kinds of things that I wish I would have thought about or considered at the time. 

[DarwinForever]

Posted By Bunny House on 7/15/2018 10:29 PM

Of course, no problem. Everyone makes mistakes. And you tried to give him the best life you could and you seem to be such a caring person it must hurt but you did what you could. It was his time to go, despite the circumstance, you couldn’t change it, it wa meant to be.
We are here for you if you need any other help or have any other questions

Thank you again.  <3

Do you have any resources (books, etc) that you would recommend in regards to rabbits?  I know that I obviously can consult this website and other online sources, but I’m also wondering if there are any really great books out there that bunny experts/enthusiasts strongly recommend?

At this point, although I will not be getting any rabbits as long as I have other pets in the house, I want to understand bunnies as much as I can. 

[DarwinForever]

Everything feels like too much today, and my heart hurts so bad that my chest physically hurts. It’s so hard to be at work right now, and I can’t stop going back in my head wishing I could jump back in time. I keep saying his face in my mind and it makes me breakdown.

[Bunny House]

Think of the good memories when you think negatively, it will take time to heal

[Gordo and Janice]

It’s going to be tough. Really tough. It’s most definitely an almost insurmountable grief when they die. And that is amplified, I’m sure, in deaths from tragic accidents because of the “if only” factor. I wish I could say the magic words and be the guru of grief relief but it is beyond me. Grief is a process similar but unique to each individual and each circumstance. Time appears to be the only common denominator in dealing with all sorts of grief. In all honesty it may get a bit worse before it gets better. But get better it will.

Some things to keep in mind. It was not deliberate and intentional maliciousness. It wasn’t deliberate and purposeful mistreatment and neglect with any intent to harm. It was an accident. You obviously loved Darwin and he was part of the family. I have found it very difficult to forgive others and pretty much impossible to forgive myself. I am not an expert on forgiveness for sure. I probably still haven’t forgiven myself for some of the things I feel I am responsible for but from what I have gathered up to this point in my life, it is of primary importance. It is unfortunate to the extreme what has happened. You have learned from first hand experience what can happen with regard to this type of situation. Maybe you can use it to “pound the table” so to speak when conversing with other owners with multiple pets about being careful and supervising when the bunnies are free roaming and interacting with those other pets.

Regardless, grief, pain, remorse, and guilt are all expected and normal. But you should also work on self forgiveness at some point, someway, somehow. Again I wish I could say the right thing but all I can do is sympathize and hope for you to get better, in time. My thoughts….

[DarwinForever]

Posted By Gordo and Janice on 7/16/2018 4:54 PM

It’s going to be tough. Really tough. It’s most definitely an almost insurmountable grief when they die. And that is amplified, I’m sure, in deaths from tragic accidents because of the “if only” factor. I wish I could say the magic words and be the guru of grief relief but it is beyond me. Grief is a process similar but unique to each individual and each circumstance. Time appears to be the only common denominator in dealing with all sorts of grief. In all honesty it may get a bit worse before it gets better. But get better it will.

Some things to keep in mind. It was not deliberate and intentional maliciousness. It wasn’t deliberate and purposeful mistreatment and neglect with any intent to harm. It was an accident. You obviously loved Darwin and he was part of the family. I have found it very difficult to forgive others and pretty much impossible to forgive myself. I am not an expert on forgiveness for sure. I probably still haven’t forgiven myself for some of the things I feel I am responsible for but from what I have gathered up to this point in my life, it is of primary importance. It is unfortunate to the extreme what has happened. You have learned from first hand experience what can happen with regard to this type of situation. Maybe you can use it to “pound the table” so to speak when conversing with other owners with multiple pets about being careful and supervising when the bunnies are free roaming and interacting with those other pets.

Regardless, grief, pain, remorse, and guilt are all expected and normal. But you should also work on self forgiveness at some point, someway, somehow. Again I wish I could say the right thing but all I can do is sympathize and hope for you to get better, in time. My thoughts….

I know that it was an accident, but it was also complete stupidity. I should have known better. When I adopted him, before I brought him home, I swore up and down he would never ever be left unattended with the dogs. But as several months went by, and the dogs and him peacefully co-existed together without any cause for concern – no signs of aggression, etc – it’s like I forgot what I knew before: that they should never ever be left unattended. It kills me to know that I had the right idea to begin with, and I loosened up on it just because I had such an unhealthy/unrealistic level of trust and faith in my dogs. It’s like I forgot they’re dogs, which is just ridiculous. The other thing that gets me is that when I fed them, I doubted for a split second if I should close Darwin’s crate door or not, and I just thought “oh, they will be fine, they have been fine every other time. Neither of the dogs would ever go after him, and I will be back shortly.” It makes me so angry and disappointed with myself that I could be so stupid and when it really counted most.

I am going to see a counselor (one that I used to see for general life issues) on Friday. Some people might think that’s extreme, but I just don’t know how to deal with the fact it was my fault – I feel like I killed him. I just don’t know what got into me to think that that was ever an OK idea to leave them unattended. I am not sure the counselor will be able to help me much there, because it feels like no matter what anyone tells me, it just feels like a lot of reassurance, when really the truth is, it was my fault: it would not have happened if I made a better decision.  I would still have him here with me right now.At any rate, I also am seeing the counselor because the event in general was extremely traumatizing for me.  I cannot even handle seeing a random spider get killed, much less seeing a pet that I love with all my heart and have devoted myself to die before my eyes.  I can’t get the terrible images out of my head and it been making me feel literally sick. 

[Bam]

DarwinForever, I’m very sorry this happened. I couldn’t agree more with what Gordo and Janice has said to you. You had no intention of harming him.

I think it’s very good you’re seeing a councellor about this. It’s not extreme to seek professional help when something is so very, very painful as this is for you.

I’m guessing it’s too soon for you to accept even the idea of self-forgiveness, but honestly, you are quite obviously a good person who made a mistake that had very tragic consequences. Humans make mistakes.

[kurottabun]

Your story reminded me of how a previous family bunny of mine died. In my country every house compound has a gate that’s usually automated – we use a remote to open and close the gate when we drive in and out of the house compound. One night my dad was bringing the trash out after dinner (the bin is located outside the gate), and as usual he would press the remote to close the gate since the bunny we had was a serial escapee. She was an outdoor bun and we would normally let her roam the compound and put her back in the cage just before we slept.

This was 12 years ago and I remember it vividly to this day. My dad holding Chippy in his arms, and blood was coming out of her mouth, dripping onto the floor. Her head was tilted upwards and her eyes were open. She had tried to escape again and when my dad pressed the remote (just like he would every night), but this time she got caught right as the gate was closing and was basically crushed to death.

My dad wasn’t aware of it until he turned around after throwing the trash and saw Chippy getting caught. He immediately pressed the remote again to open the gate, but it was already too late. I know my dad felt extremely guilty because that was one of the first times I saw him cry.

I understand how much of a shock it is, so I just wanted to let you know that what happened to Darwin was an accident, and accidents happen because we are humans. Make sure you cling on to the happy memories you had with him, it does get better with time.

[DarwinForever]

Thank you bam and kurottabun for the responses. I know that it was an accident, but it’s the fact that it was a (poor) decision I made that led to his passing that is really eating at me right now. It was something that I had all the information for, but got too relaxed about because I thought I could trust the dogs with him based off 7 months of safe interactions with him. The other weird thing is that the dog that went after him has never even went after – or paid any mind to what so ever, for that matter – any animals (rabbits, squirrels, birds, etc) in our yard. Never ever. She is a very sensitive, bit anxious dog, though, so all I can imagine is that the situation of being in a different house inhabited by another dog, my husband’s absence, etc. maybe influenced her behavior. I know that I will never really know, but I am just having a really hard time wrapping my head around it all – every last aspect of it. The horror of it and the sudden loss of my bunny, why I made the decision I did, why my dog snapped, etc.

None the less… my husband and I have decided to keep our two dogs separated when we are at work during the day. We might be going overboard, but the last thing I need is to come home to one or both of my two dogs injured or dead because they got into it for any reason. I’m on day 3 of keeping them separated during the day, and it is hard because they have been together for 6 years; my other dog cries everytime I put him in the other room and it makes me so sad, but I know that it’s for a good reason. Being that we CAN’T predict everything and how they will act in every situation, I’m just not taking my chances with them. 

[DarwinForever]

Having such a hard time right now. Each day since Friday has been just a rollercoaster of emotions and I’m finding it hard to think about anything else. Keep thinking I’m hearing his little sounds of moving about and eating his hay coming from the bedroom and it’s messing with my heart in so many ways.

[Gordo and Janice]

Checking in on you. Almost Friday. Reminding you it might get more overwhelming before it gets better. Hang tough. Get some sleep. Know that Darwin knew you loved him. That sort of thing you can tell by touch and sounds and your particular presence. He knew. Hopefully Friday you can get some direction in how to move forward and begin to heal from all of this. Still thinking of you.

[DarwinForever]

Posted By Gordo and Janice on 7/18/2018 10:30 PM

Checking in on you. Almost Friday. Reminding you it might get more overwhelming before it gets better. Hang tough. Get some sleep. Know that Darwin knew you loved him. That sort of thing you can tell by touch and sounds and your particular presence. He knew. Hopefully Friday you can get some direction in how to move forward and begin to heal from all of this. Still thinking of you.

Thank you Gordo and Janice.  Last night was very hard.  I was cleaning out this little basket where we keep mail and other papers and I came across the slip that was attached to Darwin’s cage at the shelter when we adopteed him.  I was very sad yesterday prior to that but was trying to be productive; then, finding that just made me breakdown. 

There were all these overgrown weeds in our yard behind where I buried Darwin, so I have been working the last two days after work to cut them down/pull them.  Planted some perennials by his site. Left him a few pellets and a slice of frozen banana that we still had waiting for him in the freezer before bed last night. I feel like I need to keep doing stuff for him somehow to feel mildly “normal” (for lack of better wording).  Like I’m still taking care of my bunny. 

I also kept thinking yesterday, too, how I got so lucky with Darwin.  He adjusted to our home so easily when we got him, he never had any chewing on things issues (he actually wouldn’t even chew on any of the toys I got him EXCEPT very rarely sometimes these little apple wood sticks), and never had to worry about him going to the bathroom outside of his crate despite the shelter telling us that he wasn’t litterbox trained.  He was literally the easiest bun to take care of.  The only difficulty we ever ever had with him was getting him to go to bed.  He hated being locked into his crate and he would hide in the farthest corner under the bed unless you had some really tempting treats for him (hence why I put a few pellets and banana by his grave before bed yesterday). I just miss him and his unique personality so much….

[Gordo and Janice]

Posted By DarwinForever on 7/19/2018 7:42 AM 

There were all these overgrown weeds in our yard behind where I buried Darwin, so I have been working the last two days after work to cut them down/pull them.  Planted some perennials by his site. Left him a few pellets and a slice of frozen banana that we still had waiting for him in the freezer before bed last night. I feel like I need to keep doing stuff for him somehow to feel mildly “normal” (for lack of better wording).  Like I’m still taking care of my bunny. 

That’s very wise.  It’s a gradual process.  Cleaning up his site and spending time is good, nice.  Sort of like a memorial.  Do as you need.  I don’t think anything you do along those lines is questionable.  Different people here have set up memorials in different ways.  Some in their backyards where they buried their bun and some on an end table or night stand if they had them cremated.

[Gordo and Janice]

Oh he sounds like such a good boy! I miss our little girl so much as well. It’s been closer to 7 months now. It is indescribable to non bunny owners how unique and special having one is. You can truly only experience it to understand. We are fortunate to have had that experience. An intangible eighth wonder of the world.

[Bunny House]

I’m sorry I haven’t posted on this for a while. I can’t inagaine what you are going through, as for research, just research on google for good bunny info, such as here and on house rabbit society. No matter how prepared you are for a new bun, you can’t protect them from everything. He could have had a heart defect and a bark might have set it off. I’m glad you’re gonna see a counselor, I think it will help you. As Gordo said, it’s gonna her worse before it gets better and you have no idea what new doors have opened after his death, you might be able to rescue some buns and give them a good life that he would have wanted you to.

[DarwinForever]

Posted By Gordo and Janice on 7/19/2018 8:19 AM

Oh he sounds like such a good boy! I miss our little girl so much as well. It’s been closer to 7 months now. It is indescribable to non bunny owners how unique and special having one is. You can truly only experience it to understand. We are fortunate to have had that experience. An intangible eighth wonder of the world.

You are so right.  When I got Darwin, I had no idea he would impact my life so much.  It really is something that people can’t understand until they have personally experienced the love of a bunny.

[DarwinForever]

Posted By Bunny House on 7/19/2018 8:27 AM

I’m sorry I haven’t posted on this for a while. I can’t inagaine what you are going through, as for research, just research on google for good bunny info, such as here and on house rabbit society. No matter how prepared you are for a new bun, you can’t protect them from everything. He could have had a heart defect and a bark might have set it off. I’m glad you’re gonna see a counselor, I think it will help you. As Gordo said, it’s gonna her worse before it gets better and you have no idea what new doors have opened after his death, you might be able to rescue some buns and give them a good life that he would have wanted you to.

Thank you for posting again. I mean, I feel like I had a solid handle on his diet and crate setup, checking his teeth, nail trimming, keeping an eye on how his poop looked, care with handling him and making sure he didn’t hurt himself on anything, being watchful of any behavior changes, etc. but I definitely feel like I can learn more about miscellaneous safety precautions and potential diseases in bunnies, etc.  I’ve been reading random topics on here a lot to educate myself and intend to continue to do so until the day comes where I can have another bunny (or bunnies… I think in the future, I will get two right off the bat, because I always felt like Darwin got a little bored without a friend). 

[Gordo and Janice]

Yes I am considering getting a bonded pair as well. I literally showered Icey with love and affection. Getting on the ground with her and soft talking, baby talking, or just quiet rubs, scritches, and massages. And it was probably more than what a normal human should invest in a little rabbit. But having no kids, frees up a lot of time. But even with all of that, there were Saturday and Sunday mornings at the gym or family dinners away until 9 or 10 at night. Icey was most active in the morning and evening (as most if not all are right?) so I just know on those occasions she was probably like, “What the f%$&!?!” We can turn on the TV, go through bills, surf the internet, clean, always find something to do constructive. But I could only imagine she would just have to sit here in the still quiet of the house listening to the seconds of the kitchen clock tick by. Boooooooooorrrrrred I’m sure. Bothers me to think about it in hindsight.

So that brings up questions on finding and choosing a bonded pair for Janice and me. Which I will be asking other members here when the time is right. And I am thinking about finding a pair already bonded because from what I understand bonding isn’t always straight forward and easy to say the least. Anyhow that is an entirely different discussion. I was just relating to what you said about getting two buns next time for a more fulfilling existence for the bunny/bunnies.

Let us know how the visit with the counselor goes if you so desire. If you’d rather keep it to yourself since it is such a personal thing, I understand as well.

[DarwinForever]

Posted By Gordo and Janice on 7/19/2018 11:40 AM

Yes I am considering getting a bonded pair as well. I literally showered Icey with love and affection. Getting on the ground with her and soft talking, baby talking, or just quiet rubs, scritches, and massages. And it was probably more than what a normal human should invest in a little rabbit. But having no kids, frees up a lot of time. But even with all of that, there were Saturday and Sunday mornings at the gym or family dinners away until 9 or 10 at night. Icey was most active in the morning and evening (as most if not all are right?) so I just know on those occasions she was probably like, “What the f%$&!?!” We can turn on the TV, go through bills, surf the internet, clean, always find something to do constructive. But I could only imagine she would just have to sit here in the still quiet of the house listening to the seconds of the kitchen clock tick by. Boooooooooorrrrrred I’m sure. Bothers me to think about it in hindsight.

So that brings up questions on finding and choosing a bonded pair for Janice and me. Which I will be asking other members here when the time is right. And I am thinking about finding a pair already bonded because from what I understand bonding isn’t always straight forward and easy to say the least. Anyhow that is an entirely different discussion. I was just relating to what you said about getting two buns next time for a more fulfilling existence for the bunny/bunnies.

Let us know how the visit with the counselor goes if you so desire. If you’d rather keep it to yourself since it is such a personal thing, I understand as well.

Yes, we don’t have kids either, so Darwin got lots of attention (in fact, I’m sure sometimes he wished I’d just leave him alone).   Plus, my husband and I typically work different shifts so when I wasn’t around, he was – Darwin was rarely ever without a human in the house.  But, I always feel like it has to be lonely to be the only species of your kind in your home.  That was why we got two dogs (which makes it a shame to separate them when alone now). 

I almost came home with a friend Darwin on a couple occasions – glad I didn’t now – but one of the things that I was a little concerned about in getting Darwin a friend was that Darwin was SO well-mannered, and I wondered if I got a bunny that liked to chew/destroy things, etc. if Darwin would pick up on the other bun’s behavior.  Is that a thing for bunnies?  I know it can be true for dogs or even cats. 

I think an already-bonded pair sounds like the most straight forward way to go, and that is probably what I would do in the future. 

Thank you for all of the support.  I will be posting again.

Also very sorry to hear about the loss of your Icey

[DarwinForever]

Hello everyone. Today it has been a week since I lost Darwin; it is also me and my husband’s 5th wedding anniversary, so a very emotionally confusing day. Went to the counselor today. It went OK, but the guilt remains a huge problem for me and probably will. We actually talked a lot about my dog and the possibility of anxiety in my dog.

Feel like I’m getting lot of chest congestion, and I’m betting it’s due to a severe lack of sleep combined with stress and over-exertion this week.

I’m just sad. Which I know is expected and normal — it’s just really a struggle. My husband came back from his trip just last night and it’s nice to have him back, but it also sort of emphasizes the absence of Darwin. Everyone is there now except him.

[Sofia]

Sorry to chime in so late. This is so tragic, I’m absolutely devastated and can’t imagine what you’re going through. I think you were right to go to a counsellor, your feelings were obviously quite extreme and that’s not healthy in anyone. I know that everyone grieves in different ways, but someone once told me to cry and sob as much as you want, and it really helped me get through my buns death. I know it sounds depressing, but often times people will automatically push back their feelings, which makes the whole thing even worse. Really allow yourself to feel. Something else that helped me is to keep something of Darwin’s, a blanket or something of the like. And just to have it with you, knowing that you’ll always have a little piece of him. You can cuddle with it, cry into it. Again these are just the things that helped me tons. I just want to support and help you as much as I can in this time, Binky free Darwin.

[DarwinForever]

Posted By I’m with Boo on 7/20/2018 6:41 PM
Sorry to chime in so late. This is so tragic, I’m absolutely devastated and can’t imagine what you’re going through. I think you were right to go to a counsellor, your feelings were obviously quite extreme and that’s not healthy in anyone. I know that everyone grieves in different ways, but someone once told me to cry and sob as much as you want, and it really helped me get through my buns death. I know it sounds depressing, but often times people will automatically push back their feelings, which makes the whole thing even worse. Really allow yourself to feel. Something else that helped me is to keep something of Darwin’s, a blanket or something of the like. And just to have it with you, knowing that you’ll always have a little piece of him. You can cuddle with it, cry into it. Again these are just the things that helped me tons. I just want to support and help you as much as I can in this time, Binky free Darwin.

Thank you. I have his blanket and everything. I won’t get rid of anything. I wouldn’t even be able to bring myself to. I miss him so much. Thanks again for the response. <3

[DarwinForever]

Well, Gordo and Janice was right. Definitely feels like it’s getting worse before better. The sadness is overwhelming the last couple days. I miss him so much and feel entirely hopeless right now.

[Bam]

This is so tragic, but I don’t think you need to be so devastatingly hard on yourself. There are many people who have a dog and rabbits. It’s much more difficult when there’s more than one dog. As has been mentioned, Darwin could have had a weak heart. Many domestic buns do. The situation you were in meant raised levels of stress in all the animals involved.

I blame myself for my bunny Yohio’s death, he died suddenly and I didn’t get him to a vet in time. This I will always carry with me. I find it helps to do my best not only for my other pets, but for other animals that I meet and can be of help to. I currently sponsor a neighbour’s buns with really good hay (there’s a huge hay shortage here now), I just gave water and half a boiled egg to a hedgehogling (they have difficulty finding food in the drought). Small things, but they still make a huge difference for the individual. If there were shelters here I think I would’ve liked to volunteer.

There are as many ways to deal with grief as there are people. The important thing is to find something that feels worthwhile, something that relieves the sometimes overwhelming feelings of futility.

[DarwinForever]

Posted By bam on 7/26/2018 4:12 PM

This is so tragic, but I don’t think you need to be so devastatingly hard on yourself. There are many people who have a dog and rabbits. It’s much more difficult when there’s more than one dog. As has been mentioned, Darwin could have had a weak heart. Many domestic buns do. The situation you were in meant raised levels of stress in all the animals involved.

I blame myself for my bunny Yohio’s death, he died suddenly and I didn’t get him to a vet in time. This I will always carry with me. I find it helps to do my best not only for my other pets, but for other animals that I meet and can be of help to. I currently sponsor a neighbour’s buns with really good hay (there’s a huge hay shortage here now), I just gave water and half a boiled egg to a hedgehogling (they have difficulty finding food in the drought). Small things, but they still make a huge difference for the individual. If there were shelters here I think I would’ve liked to volunteer.

There are as many ways to deal with grief as there are people. The important thing is to find something that feels worthwhile, something that relieves the sometimes overwhelming feelings of futility.

Thank you bam.  My birthday is coming up in a few weeks, so I actually started a Facebook fundraiser for the House Rabbit Society and have gotten some donations already.  My husband also offered to volunteer at the House Rabbit Society in our state with me – it’s almost a 2 hour drive, so he said if they accept volunteers that can come in like once a month, we could do it together.  I definitely want to do more. 

I’m sorry to hear that your bunny passed away and that you blame yourself, but you said yourself in that sentence that he died suddenly, so it’s not your fault if you couldn’t get him to the vet in time…and I mean this with the intent of reassurance and not to undermine your actual feelings about it; however, I understand completely how it feels and that other people’s reassurance does very little to ease the guilt.  

I love that you sponsor the neighbor’s bunnies with hay.  I was also thinking about donating hay to the local humane society here on a regular basis.  

[Gordo and Janice]

Posted By bam on 7/26/2018 4:12 PM

There are as many ways to deal with grief as there are people. The important thing is to find something that feels worthwhile, something that relieves the sometimes overwhelming feelings of futility.

Sorry it is still overwhelming.  Bam nailed it with what she said.  Time….never fast enough but eventually.  The things you are choosing to do, the volunteering, etc., very appropriate in my opinion.  Wishing you better days ahead and sooner rather than later.

[Jess]

We must always keep in mind that animals KNOW when they are being watched and when they aren’t… (Hence why your dogs behaved while you all sat on the couch together as opposed to left alone in a room together with no humans watching them.)

My holland lop knows when he needs to behave and act like a good boy, and when he can get away with being mischevious and hopping onto everything he can, thinking no one will know since the humans are in the living room. Animals are way smarter than they get credit for, and I think especially predatory animals can’t ever be 100% trusted with prey animals. No matter how good they may seem together while you are around. We really have no idea how they would act together “behind closed doors”. Seeing all the pictures of bunnies and dogs being “best friends” and cuddling makes me cringe! But that is all just my opinion.

It is terrible that you had to learn the hard way, but I know that your story will help many others. Try not to be so hard on yourself. Yes, it could have been avoided. But it was an accident. It seems that if you knew that could happen, you wouldn’t have presented the opportunity in the first place.

[Gordo and Janice]

Hugs to you DarwinForever. Glad you are coping. You sound good.

[Author]

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