This past Sunday our rescue bunny, Lugo, passed away in my arms and I am completely devastated. I just feel so lost about what might have happened and if there is anything I could have done, so I wanted to share his story. I have never posted before but there are not too many people who understand what it’s like to love a rabbit, and I would appreciate any advice from the other bunny people out there on how to cope.
Lugo first came to us as a foster when I saw his photo and description on an spca Facebook page, and I just knew I had to meet him. Even though he didn’t fully bond with my current bun (Daisy) during the fostering, my husband and I decided to go through with adopting him anyway – it felt like he was always meant to be a part of our family. He had special needs, and needed some extra TLC during the year and a half we had him – he had surgery to remove 2 maloccluded incisors that grew back, a bout of snuffles, sore hocks, intermittent soft stools – but he was doing so well recently. We had him on a low pellet diet with unlimited hay and leafy greens at night, and he hadn’t needed his “butt bath” in what seemed like months.
However, about 2 weeks ago I noticed something might be up. Lugo was always a goofy and slightly awkward bun, but he fell over a few times when he was really excited and running to get his pellets. He looked a little thin, but last time I thought that and asked the vet he ended up being fine, so I thought I was just over thinking things. Fast forward to a week ago Monday – I came home from work and he just seemed “off” – it didn’t look like he had eaten any hay, he seemed uncoordinated, and he didn’t finish his pellets which he normally went nuts for. I already had an appointment for that Wednesday, but after talking with the vet I decided to bring him in (an hour and half away) that night. The vet said he had lost a significant amount of his bodyweight since his last visit, and his heart rate seemed fast. They took an x-ray which didn’t show anything going on, but said he was too weak for blood work. They gave him fluids and then some critical care, which he devoured. The vet thought there may be some underlying disease going on that caused him to lose all that weight despite eating, and prepared us for the worst. But the next day, Lugo went back to the vet for the day for fluids and feeding. He had done well eating, and the plan was for us to continue at home until he put some weight on. Things seemed to be going well for about 3 days – even though he wouldn’t eat hay, he ate lots of other things, and drank plenty of water from syringes. But Friday night into Saturday he began eating less, became lethargic, and was even more unbalanced.
Sunday I knew he was going to leave us soon. He was breathing a little faster in the morning, and I had him on the couch with me for hours – he was so lethargic, he wasn’t interested in moving. I kept my arm close to him so he could smell me, and he gave me a few licks. Then his breathing got slower and more labored. I called my husband to come home as fast as he could, put Lugo in my lap, and watched as he took his last breaths. I talked to him and told him it was ok to go. In my gut I knew that last day that he didn’t have much time left, and I’m so glad I was with him when he died.
I miss him so much, and I can’t stop feeling guilty about whether there was anything else I could have done. He was an incredible and unique rabbit, and it is so unfair that he didn’t have more time on this earth. I know it will get easier with time, but right now that’s hard to believe.