Help! Grieving Young Bun ( and bun-mom )

[drewpea]

Hi,

Yesterday we had to make the heartbreaking decision to have 9 month old Fiver put to sleep. We still don’t know what is wrong, we’d done CT scans and dye tests, and despite all the abnormalities no causation was found. After six days he was still weighing 708 grams, and had to be supplemented with his blood glucose levels, despite eating and pooping well.

I am still kicking myself for not seeing sooner. Fi had GI Stasis back in October 17 and in the past couple months had some incontinent issues. He’d maintained eating and drinking and pooping as normal, the thing that made us take him to the vet on the 14th of this month was the sudden falling over. We feared e-cuniculi, but it appears no parasites or infections where found, and the medicine did nothing. We are waiting for the postmortem, but with main abnormalities being in his abdomen we guess it could be cancer? He was staying with an exotic mammals specialist who said it could have been something she had never treated in rabbits before.

I feel like I let Fiver, and his bonded brother Strawberry, down. Strawberry was in the room when Fi was PTS. Not for as long as we wished, but I couldn’t bare it for much longer. He had a bit of a sniff, lay beside his body, and then came to me where I stroked him. A rare occurrence, Strawberry is very uncomfortable touching!

Since we returned home, Strawberry did 2 very large stinky pees, and had some soft poos. His poos have started to harden and after we changed the pen, has stopped peeing outside his litter trays. Now, Strawberry is just spending his time flopped in small spaces. Flopped in his cardboard tunnel, in the wall space between his tray, in the far corner of his pen.

Sometimes I go to stroke him but it appears to disturb him, and since our stroke after Fi passed he isn’t interested in myself or my partner. We aren’t worried – he is grieving, we are too, and we just want to do what is best but I don’t know how to help and I need to talk to someone who understands. Strawberry is also 9 months old, and the brothers bond was so unique. We’d had them from 8 weeks from the same litter together, bonded them, and it was honestly a love I had never seen in any other species. It breaks my heart that (when we can bare it) even his new partner will be a wife-bun, and not grow old with his brother.

Sorry for such a long forum message. 

[Bam]

I’m very sorry for your loss. It seems like you had him thoroughly investigated. You didn’t let him down, but I do understand that you feel like you did – that’s how it feels when we lose someone that was in our care. It’s a very real and painful feeling while it’s going on, but it’s important to try to remember it’s a feeling sprung from loss and grief, not from something you’ve actually done wrong. I can’t see that you could’ve done more or differently. It seems you had all tests done and tried all relevant meds. Maybe he had some congenital internal malformation that affected the function of his GI tract. Maybe it was e cuniculi, it’s an insidious affliction and sometimes tests show false negatives.

I hope Strawberry will come around and start warming up to you. Buns often become more closely bonded to their humans when they’ve lost their bonded partner. I think its good for him if you talk to him, and it could also be good to touch him – perhaps on his forehead or ears or nose, because physical contact can be important to a bunny. When a human gently strokes a dog, both the dog and the human get an increase in oxytocin levels, and it could very well be the same when we pet our buns.

Your forum message is not long at all.

Binky free, sweet ****Fiver****

[drewpea]

Thank you for your kind words, Bam. They mean the world, honestly. I can’t describe how relieving it felt to see them.

We will keep on chugging, I hope Strawberry comes around too! We will try stroking, he does take some strokes. Hopefully we will bond enough to feel substantial company until we can bare to bring him a wife-bun

[Luna]

I’m so sorry about your bun. While Strawberry may seem down right now, it’s good that he was able to say goodbye to Fiver. I hope you and him can help each other until he meets his bun-wife.

Binky free Fiver

[Gordo and Janice]

Agree your message is not long at all.

And I also agree with bam that you were most thorough in your trying to help Fi. You are even going with a postmortem to try to get answers.

Sounds to me like Strawberry is in perfectly capable hands. And I also agree, interaction with Strawberry from light touch and stroking to even just lying close to and talking can only help his situation.

Sorry for you loss of Fiver.

Binky free {{{Fiver}}}

[Author]

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