Had to put my bun to sleep

[FreedomBun]

Hello everyone,

Sorry if this is a long thread in advance.

This is Freedom, she is a 6/7 year old nz white(was never given her birthdate). I’ve had her since I was child, as she was given to me as a gift. This sadly means that for the first few of her life, I wasn’t giving her the best care possible; as she was kept outdoors, had a bad diet and I didn’t spend much time with her. But as I got older, my care for her improved. I bettered her diet, upgraded her enclosre and spent more time with her.

In December 2021, I was finally able to afford a spay for her (I asked my parents before and they didn’t want to pay for it) (she also had a weeping eye during this time that didn’t go away). Unfortunetly, after the spay things kept on going downhill. The vets have had found out that she had cancer in her uterus. Luckily after sending a sample to a lab, the cancer was low-grade and unlikely to have spread. Her recovery after the spay was also really rough for her, her incision looked pretty bad and the surgery was going to cost $1.5k  (which I couldn’t afford). I went to another vet for a second opinion, and they said the other clinic was being unreasonable and her incision recovered. Freedom also got to enjoy living indoors during this time as it was the only time my parents would allow her.

A week later, at night she jumped out of her area and ate 3 leaves of a toxic plant. I called the poison hotline for help and they suggested mointoring her as she should be alright. However at night I noticed her condition didn’t improve and my brother and I had to take her to an emergancy vet. Initally the costs for treatment was going to be around 1k but after talking to her, she was able to make a cheaper treatment that was more afforable (my parents did pay for this treatment tho). She recovered from this in like 3 days, and I had to move her outside into her enclosure again.

Things were good for a month: she was happy with the new toys I got her and since I was on school holidays I could let her out into the yard daily. About a week from today, I noticed that she lost interest in her food, and found that she was only interested in eating celery; she was also passing really soft mushy stools. I was able to go to vet the next day and she had to stay there for a night. The vet told me not enough hay in her diet and she was too spoiled in terms of food and needed a diet change. She said that Freedom is recovering but skinny. The also told me to story of how another bunny had the same problem; the owners had to like kinda starve their bunny for 3 months until the bunny liked their hay. So when I got home, I began treatment. I gave Freedom her meds and changed her diet; all was good at the start. I started notice that her poo was going mushy again and her not using her litterbox, so I removed all palletes and veges (instead of reducing them) and gave her a butt bath.

At the start of this change I would see her eating her hay, so I was relieved. But 2 days ago, Freedom stopped eating and would only go for treats if I offered it too her. I called my vet and they were fully booked but gave me some advice. The advice didnt work, so I syringe fed her critical care. The next morning I noticed she was limping and was barely moving, so I offered her some hay; she was only interested in the dandelion leaf I gave her. So I gave her critical care once again. In the evening, I moved Freedom inside because my parents allowed me due to a cyclone was due. Later I checked up on her again to feed her critical care. I came back to her pen after I mixed the critical care, and I found her to be covered in her own urine and still limping around.

Extremely worried, I called a bunch of emergancy vets for advice because I had no one to take me to one. Fortunately, my brother came home and took me to an emergancy vet. After examination, the vet told us: she is extremely weak, not only losing fat but is losing muscle mass and is experiencing GI stasis. The vet said there are 3 options: to either hospitalize her for the night, to bring her home with meds or to euthanize her. However the vet recomended euthanasia. He said that with the hospitalization, there isn’t a high chance of her making the night and even if she did (from experience) most bunnies would die just a few days later. And with the bringing home method, he said she would also most likely die overnight in pain. After discussing with my brother, we decided to put Freedom to sleep.

We’re still both extremely sad that it had to come to this. Its been 1 day and I’ve been crying non-stop. I keep feeling guilty as if her diet was better she could’ve lived for longer or if I could’ve done something to prevent this. I also hoped that she could live very long so that when I moved out I could have her indoors living with me and have a bun friend. Shes so important to me and gave me a reason to keep going when I went through rough times. I hope that she enjoyed her time on earth and has forgiven me for my mistakes. She always loved to dig, destroy stuff and being lazy and lounging around. Freedom would always run to me whenever it was feeding time and chase me around. She was also a mastermind in finding escapes; from things like squeezing in small holes or going under the deck and needing me to guide her way back out.

I miss her greatly, and I wish I spent more time with her 🙁

R.I.P Freedom

you are loved and will be missed xoxo

[Wick & Fable]

I’m so sorry to read of your loss — how wonderful that Freedom lived a life accompanied by such a loving, caring owner. It is never a pleasant decision to make; however, Freedom is binkying free on the other side of the Rainbow Bridge.

Binky free Freedom.

The answers provided in this discussion are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet. Seek the advice of your veterinarian or a qualified behaviorist.

[FreedomBun]

Thanks for the reassureance 🙂 I hope you have a good day <3

[LBJ10]

I’m sorry for your loss. It sounds like you did the best that you could, which all anyone can do.

[FreedomBun]

Thank you for the kind words 🙂 I hope you have a great day 😀

[DanaNM]

I’m very sorry for your loss. You had a rough time with her, and did the best you could in your circumstances.

She was a beautiful bun <3

((( Binky free Freedom)))

. . . The answers provided in this discussion are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet. Seek the advice of your veterinarian or a qualified behaviorist.  

[FreedomBun]

Thank you for the kind response,I hope your day is wonderful! 😀

[HipHopBunny]

I am so sorry for your loss! 🙁 <3

Grief tends to makes us all look for someone to blame, someone to hatch all of the anger and pain on. And more often than not, that person who we choose to condemn is ourselves. “What if there was something I could’ve done better” “What if I hadn’t done _____,  would they would still be alive”, etc. You can’t focus on the ‘what ifs’, though. That will only prolong and incentivize the blaming and internal suffering. All you can do is remember the good you did, and the times you shared. 🙂 Freedom lived a wonderful life full of adventure, enrichment, and love – you gave her that.

Though she’s over the Rainbow Bridge now doesn’t mean that she isn’t still with you. She’s with you everywhere you go, through thick and thin. 🙂 Just remember the memory of her, and what she would’ve wanted for you. She wants to gaze down upon you from her place where she grazes, and see you happy. See the person she remembered. Unreal as it seems, this is the best thing you can do. While holding onto a loved one corporeally is ideal, sometimes we have to settle for just holding onto the memories.

(((((Binky free Freedom)))))

[FreedomBun]

That was really insightful, thank you 😀 I hope your day is amazing <3

[Author]

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