Give up on bonding? Please help!!

[Tanha]

 I posted here last week about my “bonded” pair that we got from a rescue. Other than mounting from Fuman they were getting along great. Last night though…not so much. Luckily we were home and noticed they were acting funny. Soon it turned into a fur flying mad house. Fuman mounting Fera, Fera mounting Fuman. Fera biting Fuman, chasing, Fuman pinning down Fera, both trying to get groomed and the other one not doing it, etc. There were some squeals too. So after letting them try to work it out on their own we decided it was best to separate them for the night because nothing was working to distract them. We fed them veggies once and they ate together, but as soon as that last veggie was gone it was back on. We tried spraying them with water and that only stopped them once. 

I talked to the rescue and she said she doesn’t know much about bonding and that if they were good together when she put them together she considered them bonded. They were together maybe a week before we got them this month. This week will make 2 weeks that they have been here. 

My guess from reading and watching videos is, and I hope you can advise me if what I think is right and what we should do, that while it seemed that Fera was ok with being the submissive one after getting used to her surroundings she snapped and decided she wanted to be the dominant bunny. They did not have a strong bond at all before coming here and I don’t think they were properly introduced or anything. Fuman was under the assumption he was the dominant bunny and had/has no intentions on giving that title up. They don’t seem to hate each other. They are in pens next to each other right now and they don’t try to attack each other, but personally I think they would be better separate. I really wanted a bonded pair because when I had my first bunny I always felt sad that he didn’t have a friend so I’m bummed that I don’t think they will work out together. 

The game plan is to have 2 separate pens in the same room. Letting them out to play separately and living separately. Will that work? I really don’t have experience bonding which is why I had hoped to find a bonded pair so I’m not comfortable trying to bond them again. They don’t seem upset at all about being separated which I was worried about so that’s good right?

Would it be best to try to bond them later or would it be ok to keep them separate? I talked to the local rabbit society and they think they would be good apart, but the rescue is pushing the bonding thing. 

I just want to do what’s best for these two…they seem ok now. Please help!

[NewBunnyOwner123]

Do not separate! When you seem them to start bickering immediately put them into a stress bonding situation. Put them in a basket or box and shake it about. They have been together for 2 weeks now.

They say at this point if there is a tiffle is to instead of separate, to do an immediate stress bonding.

[Tanha]

 They have been separated since last night per their instructions. Now what do I do? Is it safe to just put them back together or will the bond have to restart? 

[NewBunnyOwner123]

Just do a stress bond real quick and see how they do…

[Tanha]

I was unable to do anything last night…would it be too late today? Fuman is in the main pen today. If I put Fera back in there won’t he be territorial? She was in it the first day then yesterday we switched them. Do we stress them then put them back together? I am stressed about this and feel that I was set up for failure by the rescue since they did not apparently follow the proper steps in bonding. There were no bunny dates or anything. Just threw them together and hoped for the best. I have no experience bonding bunnies and now I’ve been thrown into it. I want what’s best for the bunnies and it would kill me to know they are unhappy or in an unhealthy situation. Sorry I’m venting. Also Fera was recently spayed at the end of May I guess. Could hormones still be a factor?

[MoveDiagonally]

I’m sorry the rescue put you in such a tough situation!

It sounds like they’ve been separate for a couple days, correct? I would take a step backwards in the bonding process if that’s the case. Separating because of fighting can actually cause more fighting down the road. It can teach them that fighting is how they get what they want which is the other bunny away from them. Instead of separating when they fight we stress bond. Stress bonding can be a car ride, putting them in a box together and jostling/dragging it, ect… I’m not trying to make you feel bad for separating or anything. The rescue did not prepare you at all for what you’re dealing with, how were you supposed to know? They told you that you were getting a bonded pair. 

If you would like to continuing bonding here is my advice:
1. Move the pen temporarily to a neutral area (one neither has made their own)
2. Stress bond them and put them together in the pen.
3. Supervise, any time there is aggression, stress bond.
4. Be consistent!
5. Once they get along in the neutral pen for a day or so move them to where their permanent pen will be. Clean first to ensure it’s as territory neutral as possible.
6. Repeat steps 2-4. Once they are getting along for a 2-3 days without fighting I would consider them bonded. New bonds can be shaky at first so there might be times you’ll need to intervene and stress bond again after but it should not be happening every day.

Please keep up posted! We can offer advice along the way. Best of luck!

[Tanha]

Thank you. I’ve been waiting on more advice locally and have been getting different answers. The rescue we got them from admitted that they don’t have much experience bonding bunnies so I’m taking their advice with a grain of salt. The other advice is from the rabbit society that says to keep them separate for now and if we want to try bonding again to start completely over in a month because of Fera’s hormones.. Also that they would be ok in the same room, but as separate bunnies if we don’t do the bonding. They said Fera’s hormones could have something to do with the change.

Would it be ok to give up on bonding for now? Would they be ok if we don’t try to rebond them? Should we jump right back in and bond again? I feel like I’m in a middle zone since they have been together before, but have been apart for a few days. They are next to each other and can see each other though.

Also if it’s a long drawn out fight over dominance is that different than a regular fight. Should it be addressed differently down the road if we do bond them again?

[Deleted User]

Important point, when were they spayed/neutered?! They do definitely need time to settle after the operation, and for their systems to go back to normal.

My understanding is that once a bond has formed they need to have it cemented, but I’m far from an expert!

[Tanha]

Fuman was neutered at the end of April, Fera at the end of May. They were “bonded” about 1-2 weeks after her spay.

[MoveDiagonally]

Fera’s hormones should be pretty calmed down by now. It takes 4-6 weeks usually and it sounds like it’s been about 4.

If you don’t start bonding again soon, ASAP, you’ll have to start the process from square one. So if you choose to stop now and bond down the road the process is “reset”.

Is it okay to stop bonding them for now? Sometimes this can lead to depression if they’ve become attached to each other. Otherwise it’s really up to you. I think since they’re already “this far” continuing to bond now would be easier than later.

[Tanha]

Thanks again. As of right now they don’t seem to have a problem being apart, but it hasn’t been long. The rabbit society woman is coming over today…hopefully we can come up with a plan…either to restart bonding or try to keep them separate for now. Sounds like bonding might be better to restart now.

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