Hey there! Figuring out a bunny is hard for sure… especially your first one.
I volunteer at a rescue sometimes, and the nippiest buns are usually scared, but they still want to be loved, they’re just scared. It sounds like your bun loves you – if she’s grooming you. If I had to guess, I would say her aggression is from her being unsure about her surroundings, and reacting very instinctively to protect herself.
My bunny I adopted from the rescue is the same way – I call it bossy. She was especially aggressive when I first got her, but over time, she got better and felt more safe and less nippy. Now she hardly ever bites, unless she’s digging something and I move too fast towards her – she’ll give me a nip to protect her territory. but I’ll just try again to pet her slowly, and she’ll calm down.
How I got my bunny to stop nipping me: I lay on the ground A LOT with her. Near her, beside her, in front of her – any distance she was comfortable with. Then eventually I would pet her while she’s on the ground, to let her know ‘ground time’ with her mum is a safe happy time. Now she enjoys it when I lay down on my stomach, facing her and pet her. She also is ok with me picking her up if I have to take her somewhere – but not to cuddle. If your bunny is a nippy bun, I would avoid picking her up, because every time you do – she might not like it, and come to associate you with a bad experience.
My bunny prefers to cuddle on the ground so that’s what I do with her. It’s been a couple years now, and when she’s on my bed, shes only now started to let me cuddle her on the bed. You just have to work up to her comfort level slowly. I only pick up my bunny if I need to give her meds or take her to the vet – but even now she won’t struggle. If I started to pick her up all the time though, she probably would.
Something else that worked with my aggressive bun is for me to pet her on the head for a few seconds (while I’m on the ground too), then I would stop, and put my hand closer to me, on the ground to give her a break… then a few seconds later, I would slowly put my hand towards her head again to give more pets – if she lunged, I would stop – so that she can dictate how much she wants to be pet. If she didn’t lunge, I would give her more pets, then a break, and so on and so forth until you don’t need to do that anymore. That gives her a chance to tell you to stop instead of biting you while you’re petting her.
Definitely if she’s not spayed too – her hormones could be what’s causing her to nip you.
Good luck!