Hi there, welcome
Your bun is very cute! He looks big! My 6 or 7 lbs? But then he kind of looks like he has a dwarf shaped head, so maybe the pic is deceiving? Dwarf buns are very feisty, so that would explain his lack of cuddly-ness (I love their spunk though!).
My girl Bertha is huge, I have to hold her and stand on the bathroom scale to get her weight (she’s 9 lbs).
You can for sure bond with an adult rabbit! All of my buns have been adults when I got them, and I adopted a 9 year old bun last year and he is amazing. He practically crawled into my arms at the shelter. A baby is a lot more of a crap shoot because their personalities change when they hit puberty (just like humans! lol).
And you might get there yet with your current bun. Some buns take a while to open up, and having young children around might make him feel a little less safe, so it might take more time. Try to encourage the most gentle behavior with him that you can (not trying to grab, allowing him to come to you, not picking up unless necessary, hand feeding, etc.). You can try to teach your kids to “ask” him if they pet him might help a lot. Basically they would place their hand on the ground in front of his face, pinky side down, so the back of the hand is facing bun. If bun puts his head down, he’d like some pats on the head and ears. if not, then they should respect that and let him be. Hand feeding works wonders as well. My rescue always has tons of kids wanting to pet the bunnies, and they will let them all walk around and hand feed, but not pet, the bunnies. The trick is to hang on to the veggie and not let the bun run off with it! Then they learn children mean food, and come running when they see them.
Another thing that might be fun to help you bond with him is clicker/target training. Every bun has a different personality, but you can find ways to enrich your relationship no matter what that personality is.
Ok, that said, bonding will also be easier with an adult, just because you can start sooner. There have been some sad cases on the forum where someone gets a baby, falls in love with it by the time it’s old enough to try bonding (neutered, healed, etc.), and then the bond failed unfortunately. With an adult you might even be able to take your bun speed-dating and let him pick a friend. Not a guarantee of an easy bond, but can rule out buns that he definitely does NOT like.
Most rescues are very interested in placing buns into homes that are compatible with them, so if you tell them you are looking for a cuddly bun that will be chill around kids, they will be able to help you find the right bunny.
Adopting a pair to bond as a trio is possible! You’ll want to be prepared for the current pair to split up during the process though (this doesn’t always happen but can). I would say for your first bonding experience just adopting 1 bun will be easier to deal with.
In terms of that, how fortuitous that you are in Seattle. Just recently the Kitsap Humane Society rescued 300 rabbits…there’s a post about it here: https://binkybunny.com/FORUM/tabid/54/aft/171251/Default.aspx
And here: https://www.kitsap-humane.org/2019/03/300-rabbits-rescued/
I’m not sure how they operate, as they are not a house-rabbit specific rescue. But here are some other Seattle area rabbit rescues (some mention they help with speed-dating as well ):
http://www.specialbunny.org/
http://www.rabbithaven.org/adoptable-bunnies/
http://www.rabbitmeadows.org/shelter/
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The answers provided in this discussion are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet. Seek the advice of your veterinarian or a qualified behaviorist.