Bonding Journal: Eden and Kya

[anneNjoerule]

Okay so I’m not overly thrilled about how bonding went today but I’m also not all that surprised. The meeting went as follows:

I grabbed both buns and a pair of thick ski gloves. I put a mat down in the tub for the girls and put them in there. I then sat on the floor next to the tub with gloves on.  Eden is chill and nearly 6 lbs. Kya is about 3 lbs and very territorial. Basically for the first 3-5 mins Kya would but her ears back, lift her tail and lunge. Again and again. And again and again I would put my gloves between them and push Kya back with a sharp “NO.” After the initial never ending attacks, things calmed down a bit. Kya still attacked here and there but for the most part the two girls sat on opposite ends of the tub. Kya was tensed the entire time but at least she would stay put and away from Eden. Eden on the other hand (bless her) was totally clueless. She groomed in front of Kya and then focused most of her attention on me. Sometimes she would try to hop out and other times she would give me a look, “Mom, when are you getting me out?” She did glance at Kya a few times and never once showed any aggressive behavior. She actually became a little too curious and tried to approach Kya for a sniff. Kya lunged as soon as she got within range. Poor Eden! There was even a point where Eden leapt to me trying to get out and Kya must have thought it was an advance because she lunged again. There were three high points over the whole 15 mins. #1 When Kya approached Eden with ears perky and tail lowered and stood nose to nose with Eden for about 30 seconds, than backed off. #2 When Kya approached Eden and Eden reared up and backed off almost immediately (I’m not sure if that’s good or not. I just felt like it was Eden accepting Kya as the dominant bunny, which has to happen because no way will Kya back down from her alfa spot.) #3 When Eden groomed herself. 

Other than bringing my hand down whenever Kya tried to make a move (occasionally she would get past me and there were quite a few chunks of fur in the bathtub when we were done) I also did some force pets, passing their smell and loose fur around and calming them down. I also ended the session with the two on opposite ends of the tub; Kya giving Eden quite the disapproving face but not making any aggressive signs, and Eden looking utterly clueless and waiting to be lifted out of the tub. 

Hope I did this right and that my girls still have hope of being friends. Any advice would be great, this is my first bond. Oh, and both girls are spayed, Kya since August 210 and Eden since about a month ago (the fur is starting to grow back over her stitches and the incision seems to have healed up really well). 

[Beka27]

This sounds very normal. Prior to the next session you might want to do some stressing.

[anneNjoerule]

 Okay, so how often should I be doing this? Once a day? Twice a day? Should I be just doing quick little 15 minute sessions like I did the other day, or should I make them go as long as I can? 

[Elrohwen]

I think it sounds promising so far because Eden sounds very laid back and easy going. Eventually Kya will realize that she can relax too. Kya is probably very nervous and imagining that Eden will hurt her – most aggression comes from fear. Since Eden isn’t doing anything back, Kya will learn to trust her.

I agree with Beka that you should try stressing next time. You can put them in the car, or in a laundry basket. My favorite technique was to shake them around in the laundry basket for a minute before putting them in the tub. I would also put them back in the basket if they were getting too riled up – that way I could stop the humping and chasing and then put them back in the tub to end on a positive note.

For now, try some more 15min sessions – you will know when you can increase the time once they start to settle down. When I was bonding, as soon as things got a little boring at one time limit I would increase the time until I was up to 3 hours. Do sessions at least once a day, but if you can do them more that’s better – more sessions = faster bonding.

[anneNjoerule]

 Okay thanks! I don’t have a car so I’ll try the laundry basket trick. I’ll try to do 2-3 sessions a day. Any idea how much time should elapse between sessions?

[Elrohwen]

I don’t think it matters really. I did find differences in behavior at different times of day though. Sessions in the middle of the afternoon were the easiest because they were more mellow. When they lived together full time they were much more active in the evenings and early mornings and had some more issues. I would recommend trying to do sessions at both times of day (maybe start with day time only, but work up to early morning or late evening). I wish I had done this so we could work through issues before they moved in together.

[Bunsen]

Great advice, I think I will do that too… even if it will take my lunch break from work

[anneNjoerule]

So today was the third day of bonding. And today’s session seemed a bit odd. I started out with a stresser just like yesterday. I put the girls in the tub together and it went as follows:
There was only one fight with growling where both Eden and Kya made some fuss. The rest of it was just scuffling, Kya seemed more nippy than angry. She would sneak up behind Eden and give her a nip. Than there was a lot of resting her head on Eden’s for nearly a minute each time before she would gently open her mouth and… NIP. I wasn’t sure if she was trying to nibble groom :/ There was plenty of ignoring and there was a point where Eden leapt over Kya and Kya didn’t seem to mind. There was also a lot of grooming in front of one another. Okay, and here’s where it gets weird. Kya flopped in front of Eden, 7 TIMES! What does that mean? Kya never flops, and now 7 times during bonding?
Anyway, I’m not sure what to think of the session because Kya was sending mixed signals (or so it appears to me and I’m not all that experienced, nipping and flopping?)
OH, last note, I left them in there for longer, I think more like 20-30 minutes.

[Elrohwen]

Flopping can also be a communication tool – Otto only flops in his MazeHaven during the day, but during bonding sessions he would flop over and over again. I think it’s probably a way of saying “I’m comfortable with you and I’m not a threat” or something like that.

It sounds like they’re making progress!

[anneNjoerule]

So due to the fact that I was busy all day and didn’t have any time for the girls until this evening… And due to the fact that our laundry basket was (and still is) MIA… I did a bathtub session without stresser and at night. It went as well as could be expected. Lots of attempted fighting on Kya’s part and a few nips here and there. Eden groomed herself once. There were about two points where Kya ignored Eden, and innumerable points where Eden ignored Kya. There was one point where they stood head to head and I think Kya gave a few very grudging face grooms, than put her head down for maybe 15 more seconds and than snapped. I think she was asking for return grooms and Eden didn’t oblige so she was offended or something?

[anneNjoerule]

 It seems that every time Kya even puts her nose to Eden she comes away with a big wad of fur. It doesn’t matter how quickly I stop the fight, she always manages to get some. I find it infuriating because I feel powerless to stop her and I am sooo worried that Eden is going to start getting bald patches. I love her black shiny fur and I would hate for it to go away. Could Kya get enough out to really make a difference and is there a way to stop her? She’s so fast! Help…

[Elrohwen]

Hannah often pulls tufts out of Otto’s bum and I’ve never noticed him getting a bald patch there. It’s just something that dominant bunnies do and she’ll settle down over time. The number of Otto tufts I find in the cage has steadily decreased since they were first bonded.

[anneNjoerule]

Okay, thanks. Yesterdays bonding session went well I think. The girls still don’t seem able to be next to one another without some scuffling but they can now be near one another and still be relaxed. Last night there was lots of flopping from both sides, lots of grooming from both sides, and very relaxed body language. I slid them together and did some face pets to stimulate grooming. It didn’t work but they didn’t snap.

[Elrohwen]

It sounds like things are going really well!

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