Bonding issues!

[Tedster]

So I have Teddy for almost half a year now and I think that he still doesn’t trust me because sometimes, I have to pick him up against his will and put him in his carrier to go to the vet and now, he’s just straight up scared of me. When I put my hands around him just to hug him, he freaks out and jump away. I tried laying on the floor for 2 hours, playing on my ds so he can come up to me, but he doesn’t take any interest in me at all; he’ll either lay in his cage or sit at the corner of the playpen and stare blankly somewhere. He is getting neutered on the 23rd of December but I heard that it’s not going to really change him so I don’t think it really matters. I know that most rabbits just won’t tolerate being held at all, but Teddy takes it to the extreme. He’s so skittish, that I can’t even clip his nails for him. We tried picking him up because he won’t get in his carrier and he’ll just keep wiggling until he literally falls down to the ground and I hate it because I’m afraid that he’s going to hurt himself, but at the same time, I need him to stop cause he will keep having vet visits. Sometimes, I even thought about exchanging him for a new bun because they said that we can, but I really want to keep him but he’s not making this work out. I try so hard to bond with him, but he keeps running away from me. He won’t let me pet him or touch him…what can I do? I really need help. If I plan to exchange him, I have to cancel the neutering appointment because they’ll probably keep him as a rabbit for breeding, so if I get him neutered I can’t exchange him. I truly want to keep him, but it’s useless to have a pet when it’s so scared of you…He’s a great bun, he follows his routine and schedule everyday, despite the fact that he isn’t neutered yet he’s still very well litter trained and he’s not a trouble maker at all. He just can’t stand still when I’m there with him and when I pet him, he slowly stretches and move away from me. I put food on my lap and he doesn’t even want to sit on my lap to eat it because he’s that afraid to get near me…I don’t know guys…what can I do to make him stop treating me like this…and if I can’t, should I exchange him…?

[JackRabbit]

Bonding with a bunny and earning his trust takes time, patience, and willpower. One of the first steps is to resist the urge to reach for him and pet him. You’re doing fine sitting on the floor with your ds, but it sounds like he isn’t sure he can trust you yet. When you’re on the floor, try talking softly to him (even whisper), but don’t reach out and don’t try to pet him. He will eventually become curious about you and come over to check you out. Let him get used to being close to you without being touched. (I lay on my stomach on the floor and my bunnies hop around on my back). Move on to offering healthy treats. Once he’s comfortable with that, you can try a little head rub followed by the treat. He may never be a lap bunny (most bunnies aren’t), but if you take baby steps with him, he will come to trust you. With bunnies, everything must be on their terms or all bets are off!

[Kyrkogrimr]

You’re saying that you need to pick him up to put him in his carrier – is there any way you can encourage him to go in by himself? Put treats inside, for example? When we first brought Puck home, we left his carrier in the cage as a hide for him so that he wouldn’t find it strange or intimidating when we needed to put him in to take him to the vets. We’ve since got him a new hide, but I still sometimes put his carrier in there so that it doesn’t become unfamiliar and potentially frightening for him.
I second what JackRabbit has said about giving him time and refraining from trying to touch him right now – he needs to know that if he doesn’t want to be touched that that’s ok and you won’t force it on him; remember how much bigger than him you are and how frightening it might be if someone proportionally larger than you wanted to pick you up and cuddle you all the time while you’re still not sure if they’re trying to pick you up so they can eat you! If you’re anxious to make progress, he can probably sense that, even if he doesn’t understand what you’re anxious about and it may make him more skittish.
With Puck I spent the first few days sitting in a chair next to but outside his pen and just read a book, chatted with him when he came to the side of the cage or pen, but mostly left him to it. After that I sat in the pen with a book or sat in the pen while I watched tv – I was there for him to explore but I was otherwise occupied, so I wasn’t staring at him or anxious to “do something” that felt like progress.
Obviously I’m not an expert, but that’s what worked for me.

[Tedster]

Okay thanks. Teddy just got neutered today. I will be trying out all the methods after he recovers. At first, when we put a treat in the carrier, he will just jump in it and we close it up, now he knows that we’re going to close him up, so it doesn’t work anymore. We either have to carry him or like corner him into the carrier…it sounds bad I know, but I can’t do it any other way. Thank you for answering guys. I hope it’ll work!

[Author]

Messages