Bonding Advice and mixed signals?

[Alaska'sMom]

Hi everyone! Just recently found BB and thought it would be so useful to get some advice about my bunny, Alaska. I’ve had her for about 3 months now and she is already my everything. I adopted her from a non-profit organization that had received her from someone who found her in a parking lot (where she lived as a stray) with her mom and sister. They never said how long they had her up for adoption but she looked fairly young on her adoption pictures on the website so I believe for awhile. She’s about 5 years old now and was already spayed long before I adopted her. I wanted to adopt an adult bunny since they never get picked. I have had one bunny a year ago that passed away while I was on vacation. So I was ready and extremely eager to adopt again. Looking back I should have asked more questions before picking her but its too late to be thinking like that now. For the passed 3 months I have been bonding with her but I feel as though she doesn’t like me? I know everyone says that but whenever she comes to smell me she flicks her back feet at me which I know is a big middle finger in bunny language. She will take food from my hands then flick her back feet at me when she’s done. Sometimes I get a few little pets but then she moves away. She is comfortable enough to lay close to me but not too close. She sometimes nips, digs at my feet, and nudges my ankles a lot (which I think is for treats). She has yet to come to me for attention and only comes because I’m the food lady. Every morning for breakfast I hand feed her pellets and she has even been able to take it from sitting on my lap and then after she hops away with a flick in the back of her feet. But she only sits on my lap that when its breakfast time. I spend a lot of my time on the floor with her and every once and awhile she comes to lay near me. Every so often I try my luck to pet her while she’s laying down and she gets up like she’s scared. Every once and a while I can get a few pets on the side while she’s eating or just following me for food. I had to pick her up twice since adopting her for vet visits which she hated but after she was fine. Even before that she was the same. I feel as though I’m getting lost in understanding her from all the nudging and foot flicking. I just want advice on what else I can do to bond with her and so she knows I’m her friend and not just food lady. She is totally happy right now and does binkies every night which makes me the happiest person ever and I absolutely love her to death despite her attitude. I just would like some advice on what else I can do. Regardless of everything I am happy I am able to provide her with a forever home but I would appreciate any advice!! (sorry for the long paragraph lol)

[DanaNM]

It sounds like you are doing great so far actually! My advice is to play hard to get a little bit. 😉

Meaning, don’t try to pet her just yet. Food does equal love in bunny language, so you will eventually transition from food lady to dedicated bunny worshipper. Sounds like she’s got you right where she wants you! 😉

Some buns take a while (even 6 months or more) to accept and enjoy pets, but I think you are on your way with her.

It’s good that she will lay down near you. I would wait until she lays near you regularly, then lay down on the floor near her, but don’t pet just yet. Once that behavior seems stable, try reaching out to pet her while you are also laying down. I like to “ask” them if I can pet by placing my hand on the ground near their face (just a bit to the side of their nose), pinky-side down, so the back of my hand is facing them. This is similar to a “grooming request” between two bunnies. If bun puts her head down, she wants pets. Then you can pet. 🙂 If she doesn’t, then don’t force it and try again another time.

. . . The answers provided in this discussion are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet. Seek the advice of your veterinarian or a qualified behaviorist.  

[Alaska'sMom]

Thank you DanaNM for your advice!! I think she will for sure be one of those bunnies that takes awhile to really get used to me and take awhile to bond with. My previous bunny was so easy!!! Kind of a shock because I’ve never been with a bunny so timid and distrustful. But it will take a lot of time. I have been trying to “ask” for permission to pet her like what you recommended and she seems pretty forward about her answer. Either she will ignore me, nudge me away, or give me a little nip as a warning to leave her alone. lol At least she’s clear about what she wants!!! I’m not sure if maybe having a friend for her would help her feel more comfortable.

[DanaNM]

Just keep at it and be patient! It can take several months to build trust. But those are the most rewarding once you get it. 🙂  It can take anywhere from 3-6 months to start seeing improvements. And often the improvements are not that gradual. It’s like one day they decide they trust you and then things are great. 🙂

You might also like finding other ways to interact with her in the meantime. Clicker training can be really great, especially since she already knows you are the food lady. Other toys can be fun too. My first bunny Bunston (who was really shy at first!) would roll a ball back to me if I rolled it to him. 🙂

. . . The answers provided in this discussion are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet. Seek the advice of your veterinarian or a qualified behaviorist.  

[Alaska'sMom]

Thank you so much for the advice DanaNM!!! I’m gonna have to try the clicker training thing. Seems really interesting and fun. I look forward to the day when Alaska really starts to trust me. 😀  She’s for sure worth the wait. So cute how Bunston would do that!!! Love seeing bunnies play.

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