Bleu

[Sleepy]

I posted about Bleu’s battle with broken jaw and bone infection here (thanks to everyone for vibes and condolences), but I thought I should write something else here anyway while feelings are less raw. 

Pictured him here with Guinness, because the best pictures of him we have were with her. 

We met Bleu at the same time as Guinness. They were at the same pet store that had just opened, a few months after we lost our last bunny, Whisky. We still dearly missed Whisky and he was a Dutch like Bleu with similar colouring, save Bleu’s heterochromatic eyes, but Guinness was there and she had the right personality for us at the time (aka, queenly, smug, and demanding attention). It was a really hard decision but we went with Guinness. 

However, we kept seeing Bleu at the store whenever we went in for supplies. He wasn’t adopted for about two months, we assume maybe because of his eye and shy personality, and eventually he was old enough the store had to move him to a seperate place to avoid any accidents with the other bunnies. He always looked sad and isolated there and we hoped he’d get a good home.

We didn’t get him under ideal circumstances. Our mom surprised us with him as a literal Easter bunny and left us to deal with the consequences of not knowing whether we’d be allowed to keep him, keeping him away from Guinness while they were unfixed, and making sure they both had runtime and love. He had to stay in the basement for a month but, eventually, we did bond him and Guinness and he moved into the kitchen with her.

It was a perfect match, for us and her. Bleu was a suckup for attention and he always would run up looking for love. If you napped in the kitchen, he’d usually come and sleep nearby. If you had a treat, he’d always be the first to taste test. If there was a sunspot in the kitchen, he’d sometimes come out and doze in it. And he liked watching TV with us, especially loving Pokemon, Minions, and How to Train Your Dragon 2. Him and Guinness would occasionally get humpy with each other and they’d steal food from each other’s mouths but them snuggling together was a constant sight, as was the *scandalous* image of them spending minutes just mutually grooming each other. He completed us and I always hoped, since he and Guinness were about the same age, they’d be able to be together for a long time.

Then the broken jaw happened. The vet prognosis was “I can’t guarantee anything” but we still hoped since we’d read stories of other bunnies with broken jaws and because Bleu fought so hard. He still wanted love and I made sure to sneak short visits with Guinness, who usually groomed him and kept him company through the bars of the pen. He still loved to eat and the highlight of his day was probably his veggies and banana. He still had enough energy to get his neck yoke off and managed to keep it off for his final day at least. Even when his wire got pushed up and he was on three painkillers, he wanted to be with us.

It’s why when we took him in for his second surgery, it took all of us by surprise. The vet showed us the x-rays afterwards to help assure us there was nothing else we could’ve done but hearing that the bone had been eaten away by pus and infection still kills me because I can’t help but wonder what caused it (the wire being pushed up? the fact his bone was constantly rubbing because of the place of the break? just some bacteria the meds missed?). Even now, I wish we’d known sooner or had one more day with him to spoil him with as much banana and his favorite movies but letting him go while he was still somewhat sedated and on painkillers, before the infection got worse, was the least painful way he could go. We were all there, including Guinness, and pet him and assured him he was loved the entire time.

Despite all that though, he still fought, even to the very end. The vet injected him with something to help him drift off and said he’d likely be gone in 10-15 minutes. Half an hour passed and by then he’d woken up briefly until we calmed him down and he went back to sleep. They gave him a second shot and he almost drifted away by the hour mark. He was gone for five seconds and completely limp and then he came back and kept breathing. They had to give him a final injection to help him let go, which I suspect they did because they felt sorry for us. However, that still meant we got an extra hour with him.

It’s been about a week and, while coping better, it still hurts. I keep walking upstairs to see Guinness and she’s alone, rather than with her husbun. Likewise, I go to clean the litterbox or fill the hay rack and I keep thinking there’s not enough poop to clean or not enough hay eaten. Guinness has her pen back and is eating, flopping, and being her smug self (plus, we’ve had a rare break of warm weather so been taking her outside to play) but it’s hard to tell with bunnies. I’d like to believe she had some idea that Bleu was seriously sick and had time to process and accept his passing (she even managed to parkour into the pen for a short while a day before he left us) but I think she’s still lonely sometimes. She’s coming to sit with us more often and, since my sister’s been sleeping in the kitchen recently, she’ll sleep on her sherpa bed rather than in her pen. However, we can’t always be around and, even yesterday, I went to pick her up and put her back in the kitchen once her runtime was done and she resisted, apparently wanting to hang out in the living room with us longer.

When I think about it, I remember how when Guinness was a single bunny we’d spoil her with extra out time watching things like LoTR movies with her since, if we put her away and were still in the living room, she’d bang on her pen and demand to be out with us. She stopped, I think, partially because she eventually got free-roam of the kitchen but also because Bleu was there to keep her company. Even when Bleu did escape attempts, I feel like she stopped doing that as much because if Bleu was there she had everything she needed.

I know things will hurt less eventually but I still miss him. He was almost three years old and he was healthy, before the broken jaw. Looking through pictures, I don’t doubt he was happy and loved. However, I keep thinking he should’ve had more time with Guinness, watched more movies and shows, more naps with us, and had more sunny days to run around outside. 

Guinness is my baby, but Bleu’s my good boy and suckup bunny. I’ll love and miss him for a long, long time.

[Charlotte]

Your story made me cry, it reminds me of my baby boy and numerous times I took him to the vet, at least twice a week for the past 2 months. I buried him in my courtyard, I went to see him and talked to him every day. 

Binky free Bleu, please tell my baby boy Oreo mom misses him when you see him.

[Wick & Fable]

What a wonderful life you’ve told. There are obstacles, but even the photo shows such bliss. What a full life to develop such a personality and develop such a relationship with you.

Binky free Bleu.

The answers provided in this discussion are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet. Seek the advice of your veterinarian or a qualified behaviorist.

[LittlePuffyTail]

I’m so very sorry. Bleu was obviously very loved.

((((Binky Free Bleu)))))

[Sleepy]

@ Charlotte: Sorry to hear about your Oreo. Long-term care and nursing always makes it harder. Hopefully, Bleu and Oreo are binking along the bridge with their favorite things.

@ Wick: Thank you. I’d like to believe that even if it was for a few years, he still had that much.

@ LittlePuffyTail: Thank you. That’s a very good saying. A friend told me something similar, since she’s lost a pet under similar circumstances: that the fact it hurts so much means there was so much love.

[Bam]

I’m so sorry about Bleu. I hope Guiness will be ok. Your story made me cry too. Its difficult to find words, LPT says it vey well,

[Gordo and Janice]

You wrote in such a way that I could feel the depth of it. A beautiful tribute for Bleu. So much emotion and love and life in all those words. It is so wonderful how you made everything work and created such a perfect environment for everyone. His life was short but he was obviously loved dearly and had a more fulfilling life in that short time than a lot of bunnies. And that is a perfect picture…speaks volumes. So much love. And such a tough little fighter. Heartwarming and heartbreaking all at once. Thank you for treating him so. Virtual hugs to all of you there.

Binky free {{{{{Bleu}}}}}

[Sleepy]

@ bam: Thank you. To be honest, in some ways I feel like she’s comforting us more than we’re comforting her. But who can tell with bunnies.

@ Gordo and Janice: Thanks. I’ve had a week to think on it and I’m glad the words came out right. If nothing else, we got him out of that isolated space in the pet store and know he didn’t end up in some small hutch outside or in a less loving place.

[Coco]

Made me cry! Yes we love our sweet friends, and do everything we can to keep them safe.
How did bleu break a jaw? Or do you even know? This bun I have now is not like any bun I have had before. She makes me worry, as she gets into things I think that I have made safe for her.

[Author]

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