I’m struggling to cope with losing my furry friend and just wanted to share my experience to offload really, I hope this will help me to heal.
I rescued Mr Peanut last July, he was only one years old and had been neglected most of his life. When I got him he was so grumpy and sad and used to grunt at me constantly. I knew we were meant for each other because when I went to visit him before deciding to rescue from the centre, he came and put his head on my knee and let me stroke him. I took that as a sign that he knew I’d care for him, I feel like it was fate.
I spent hours and hours with him (he was an indoor bun). I used to lay on the floor and feed him vegetables and hay every day for months until eventually he started to show a loving and warm personality, a bunny that loved food and loved to play.
Unfortunately not long after I rescued him Mr Pea got a sore eye so I took him to the vets. They suspected an infection And gave him eye drops. These didn’t work and his eye got worse. He withdrew from life and seemed in pain a lot of the time. We had him x rayed and it showed a mass in his jaw bone alongside very damaged tooth roots. The vet said it was likely to be osteomyelitis and the prognosis was poor but we could manage it for now. Pea was put on metacam permanently and a course of antibiotics.
He survived like this for about 9 months and lived a happy and joyous life; I even got him bonded to our other bunny and he was so happy. I felt so happy that he was experiencing al the good things life has to offer after such a crappy start to his life.
Then suddenly he got a huge growth on his cheek below his eye; straight to the vets who prescribed depocillin injections which I had to give every other day, he hated these but they did the trick for two weeks.
Last week his growth came back with a vengeance; his eye glued shut and he was sad, although still enjoyed snuggles and food. Then on Wednesday I came home from work and noticed the growth had gone and what was left was a trrroble smell and skin on his cheek that didn’t look good. We rushed him to the vet who was ridiculously unhelpful and said she didn’t know if his eye was good and that his cheek was necrotic and would fall off. She literally sent us home and said we should come back when he gets a hole in his cheek.
We took Pea home and discussed our options; we knew it was probably time to let him go but I so didn’t want to. Wednesday night I gave him a little extra metacam so he could truly relax (he really seemed pain free for the first time in a long time). We decided to take him back to the vets and demand some help, whatever that may be.
Last night, with a very heavy heart we made our way to the vets with Pea. I cried literally all day and was shaking by the time we got there, I couldn’t bare the thought of ending his life; he was literally my whole world.
The vet saw him and said we couldn’t take him home; our options were to remove his eye but that his osteomyelitis had spread and this would leave an open wound basically perfect for further infection. He would suffer and in the end it would never cure the real illness. The vet said the best thing to do would be to PTS and we agreed. I cried. I gave him his favourite biscuits and held him for as long as I could. I told him how sorry I am and that I love him. He laid in his basket and accepted the cuddles and in a way I think he knew.
The vet came and did the deed and I felt the life leave the room. I knew Pea had gone and he was no longer suffering and I felt relieved that he didn’t have to fight anymore. I said goodbye for the last time and left.
Since coming home I feel empty. My other rabbit is lost without him and wants cuddles al the time and together we feel so sad. The house is so quiet without him and I don’t know how to cope with the loss. I know he had a good life with me and was loved to the fullest and for that I’m grateful. I just wish I could have him back.
Losing Mr Pea has been the hardest thing and I know this is long and I’m sure people won’t make it to the end but I guess this is my tribute to him and his life.
Mr Pea you were loved more than life; still are, and I hope you come back as something wonderful because you deserve the world.
Xx