A bonding nightmare (Also, hi all, it’s been a while)

[RetroSquid]

Hi, well. This is the first time I’ve been back here since our end of life decision for Daisy back in December 2021.

After swearing we would never get buns again, it happened. We sort of stumbled into bun parenthood again last year. Meet mother and daughter. Cinnamon (3-4yo) and Hopper (2-3yo)
We, somewhat foolishly, assumed that, as a bonded pair, as mother and daughter, we wouldn’t have any problems with their relationship… Well, we have been proven very wrong.

They came to us in November and things were mostly fine. A little bit of friction, but nothing a few treats and extra attention didn’t solve. But around the very tail end of spring, something changed and they started fighting, seemingly to the death and have been seperated since.

I’ve been working at rebuilding their relationship, rebonding them and generally working my butt off trying to give these two buns their bonded companion back. And absolutely nothing has worked.

They would play nice in the bonding pen for a couple of weeks, at one hour intervals, even being able to set them up in the kitchen while I cook and they would happily sit together, goom eachother and actually look quite happy.

But it’s getting harder and harder, they’re becoming increasingly less tolerant of eachother and it’s now resulting in injuries as, in the blink of an eye, they can go from loafed and calm to fur flying. And we’ve had a couple of vet visits as there has been a couple of quite nasty bites.

Seeing how completely bonded they were… 

It makes it very difficult to deal with how everything is now.

We also, happened upon another bun in need of a home, here’s Biscuits. 

He’s around the same age as Cinnamon. He’s such a friendly, gentle boy.
We had hope that, including a calm, mature boy into the mix might allow Cinnamon and Hopper to exist without eachother being the sole focus of oneanother. And all the individual bonding sessions have been great. He’s been fixed, but is still a little humpy. But neither girl has acted remotely aggressive towards him. They’ve been completely submissive and tolerated his moments of frantic humping, though we’ve been sure to intervene so it doesn’t go on for too long and they’ll then settle down and eat toether or just loaf side-by-side.

But, about an hour ago, we tried the first trio bonding session. A completely neutral space, a big plate of food and two adults on hand to jump in if there is any aggression.

Well… Cinnamon and Hopper were immediately on edge, it was like they didn’t even see Biscuits there. They just wanted to kill. Fur flying in an instant and just stress and chaos. I genuinely don’t see them ever being together again, we’re at a complete loss for what to do…

[LBJ10]

I swear girl-girl bonds are the hardest. It sounds like their hormones peaked in the spring (even spayed/neutered bunnies experience hormonal changes around this time of year) and then they just didn’t settle down again after that. Were you planning on keeping them as a trio? Or could you maybe just bond Biscuits to one of them?

[RetroSquid]

Yeah, I remember back when we brought Daisy home, yes Link was a bit of a miserable poo and just didn’t want to engage, but Navi actively wanted Daisy dead for the first few weeks. She settled quickly, though.

With Cinnamon and Hopper, it’s an aggression the likes of which I have never seen before and it’s now been consistent for 5 months.

They were rescues, so we’re not 100% on their history, but when we had them neutered, the vet said that Cinnamon had likely been used for breeding. She actually severely herniated as soon as we got her home and she needed immediate emergency surgery. Her abdominal muscles are just in tatters, from the suspected repeated litters.

It almost feels as though, as she’s had every litter she’s ever had taken away, she’s now stuck with this one kid and she doesn’t know how to deal…

Maybe I’m anthropomorphising to a degree, but it’s just such a weird, stressful situation.

The plan was to have a trio, but it’s clear that, even with the addition of Biscuits, he’s not enough of a distraction to take the pressure off their relationship. They show no agression to Biscuits and he shows none to the girls. Also, when Cinnamon is out, we have to block off access to Hopper’s pen, otherwise they just fight through the bars, but when Hopper is out, she just goes and lies as close to Cinnamons’ pen as she can get without being bitten or boxed through the bars. Hopper very clearly wants and needs that bun companionship, but Cinnamon just won’t.

We had thought that we might have to simply rehome one of them, but that’s a decision I don’t know how to make. They’re both just so different. Hopper is very sociable. Sits on my lap, gets up on the dining table to be in my face if I’m sitting alone, and actively seeks out company. BUT, she despises our older cat, Bubblegum and just goes on the aggressive whenever she see’s him.

Cinnamon on the other hand, she’s not so friendly, will come over for treats, but is otherwise quite aloof. And if the cats are around, she will go and give them a sniff and then ignore them.

Then Biscuits, he actively likes the cats, follows them around, sits with Bubblegum and even binkies over and around him if Bubblegum loafs anywhere near him.

They’re all so different.

I’m thinking, as Hopper clearly craves the company, that Biscuits and Hopper should become friends at this point, then Cinnamon can move upstairs for the time being. As we work from home, there’s always somebody either upstairs or down, so it’s not like she’d be isolated from company, just from buncompany.

[LBJ10]

This seems like a good place to start. And, who knows, maybe having Cinnamon away from the other two for a while will make her forget about not liking anyone. It’s possible she will warm up to the idea of a friend (or friends) after she has spent some time away from them. It sounds like it won’t be too difficult to get Hopper and Biscuits bonded.

 

[BrunosMama]

Hey RetroSquid! Good to see you! 🙂

I wonder if it would be possible to bond one of the girls with Biscuits, then down the road, try the trio again? Obviously there’s the risk of breaking the bond, but perhaps the girls just need some time apart and perhaps they will forget they hate each other.

 

[LBJ10]

Yes, this is what I was alluding to. LOL  Maybe it would be worth bonding one of them to Biscuits first and then seeing how things go with that arrangement for a while.

[RetroSquid]

Hi!

I just left a somewhat lengthy reply to LBJ10 above, fyi. 🙂

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