I think the main thing to emphasize is that if he kicks out while his legs are dangling is that he could injure his spine permanently. Rabbits spines are very different from a dog or a cat’s, and their hind leg muscles are so strong, that they can literally break their own back by kicking out while being held in correctly. It isn’t a matter of preference, it is a matter of safety for the rabbit.

Rabbits are also prey animals, so if they are held in a way that isn’t supportive, it can make them fearful (as if they are about to get eaten by a predator) and lead to struggling.

Perhaps you could show her some information on this? This article shows safe and humane ways of handling: http://www.medirabbit.com/EN/Surgery/Restraint/Handling.htm

There is a video in that article there that explains things very well, especially about not picking up by the chest. She might respond well to it since it is from a vet-tech (rather than a random youtuber). However, I will point out that she flips the bunny on it’s back, which can be helpful in a veterinary setting, but isn’t really recommended anymore unless absolutely necessary (the video is from 2008 and opinions have changed on it).

I tend to personally use the “head in the crook of the elbow” method a lot, AKA the “football” hold. Notice that scruffing is almost never recommended (really only in cases of an aggressive rabbit in a veterinary setting, and still with the hindquarters supported).

Since we are talking about safety, I’m also obligated to mention that leashes and collars are very dangerous for rabbits. Harnesses are somewhat debated, but collars are especially dangerous and there isn’t really any debate around that. If the rabbit spooks while wearing a collar and leash they can injure themselves very badly. A much better option is to set up an x-pen to create a space where the bun can hop around freely. They can be moved to that space in a carrier to make sure there are no mishaps.