Oh my gosh, how stressful for all of you.
Sorry if you said this, but is she on a motility medication in addition to her appetite stimulant? Or pain medication? Stasis recovery can be like “trying to jump start a train”, so it can be very slow with some ups and downs. Pain meds and motility meds can be very important (sometimes a combo of motility meds is needed, depending on where the slow down is in the GI tract).
Also… did the vet check her teeth? I’m probably biased from my own experience, but underlying dental problems could be at play, making her in pain and not wanting to eat (esp not wanting hay).
Don’t beat yourself up about force feeding her, I would have done the same. It’s likely that she was already about to slow down again (hence the not eating hay), rather than the feeding making things worse.
I understand how you feel about wanting to reduce stress and not making things worse, it is so hard taking care of a bunny with a chronic condition.
Try you best to be as calm and reassuring as possible when you have to give her meds or feed her. She will sense that you are stressed/nervous/fearful and it will make her more scared. The more calm you can be the easier it will be. I like to pretend I’m giving a really yummy treat (high voice, excited, etc), I swear it helps!
Also, have you tried offering her critical care on a plate? My bunnies love it and will lick it off a plate (only the apple banana flavor though). Sometimes mixing in canned pumpkin makes it tastier to the bun as well.
She also might be depressed from being separated from her mate…. I understand needing to separate to monitor poops, but she might be happier living side by side with him. That will make it easier to rebond them once she is better as well.
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The answers provided in this discussion are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet. Seek the advice of your veterinarian or a qualified behaviorist.