Thanks so much! I will just keep prebonding them for another few weeks and then try my parents house. Good to know this is fairly normal. I’ll keep you guys updated once I start the dates again.

So when I have their “first” date again after a month of pre-bonding, I’ll bring them to my parents house so they are in a new area. Have it be a larger space with lots of boxes and things to distract them (should I also have food in there? litter box?). I’m pretty sure they will start fighting since they have every other time I’ve tried, so what should I do when they fight? I’ll try spraying them with water but if that doesn’t work and I have to physically separate them, do I just move them a few feet apart and see what happens? In the few dates I tried with them I would do that but they would always go straight back to fighting so I would just end the date before they killed each other. This is the part where I’m most confused. I know you are supposed to end the date on a good note, but if they won’t stop fighting I don’t see how to do that. I also don’t know if it’s a fight that I should not intervene and see if they stop, I’m so worried they will get hurt, especially since Leo bit Gibbs down to the skin in half a second.

Are there any signs I should be looking for in order to tell if they have pre-bonded enough and are ready for a date?

They generally hang out right across from each other, sniff each other through the bars, sometimes they run back and forth across from each other. The other day they were both sticking their noses through the bars and Leo tried to nip at Gibbs, Gibbs had no reaction and kept sniffing. Leo is also pooping everywhere to mark his territory. I’m just wondering how you can tell if they have prebonded enough to have a date. Thank you!

Ok thanks Dana! it’s been 5 weeks since I brought Gibbs home and started the pre-bonding, but I had those couple dates in the beginning so I’ll wait another couple weeks and see if Leo gets any less aggressive. It definitely seems like Leo is watching Gibbs’ every move and if Gibbs suddenly runs somewhere Leo runs there too. Gibbs couldn’t care less about what Leo is doing though.

I was thinking of possibly doing the dates in our yard in the grass, taking 2 x-pens to make a large area (is that large enough?), this way we won’t have to drive 30 minutes to my parents house every day for what could only be a 10 minute date. Do you guys see any issues with having a date outside? They both have never been in the yard before. Let me know what you guys think.

Ok perfect! To not have to worry about birds, do you think setting up a tent would be good? My boyfriend is a product designer for tents and sleeping bags so we have a bunch of tents we could use haha. I don’t know why I didn’t think of using a tent earlier, we could probably set it up in a room in our apartment too to make it a neutral space, right?

Dating has begun!

I had one date yesterday outside using 2 xpens to make a big area and put in a couple tunnels and hidey boxes with 2 openings. They had a few interactions, but mostly just explored on their own, Leo would sometimes nip at Gibbs and we would spray him with water and he immediately stopped and just wandered off. One time I think Leo might have chased him a bit? Then Leo seemed to have his mouth on Gibbs’ butt so we sprayed him and he stopped. We ended the date at around 10 minutes, no real fighting, so I think this was a pretty good first date! What do you guys think?

Had a second date today, same set up outside. Today they mostly ignored each other and Leo seemed to claim a cardboard box and just hid in there, and Gibbs kept laying down inside a 3-way tunnel (3 tunnels that all connect in the middle). Gibbs tried to go into the box that Leo was in and got in a tiny 2 second fight. Leo would go into the tunnel while Gibbs was laying in there and Gibbs pretty much didn’t care, but would fight back if Leo tried to attack him. I sat in a chair outside the pen and just watched for a while. Most of the time they were separate, just hiding in their box/tunnels. Every now and then one of them would come out and explore. I waited around an hour and still nothing much was happening. One time Leo went into the tunnel while Gibbs was laying and was able to just hop by without anything happening. After about an hour and a half I decided to end the date, didn’t seem like anything else was going to happen.

Should I not put the boxes/tunnels in next time in order to force them to interact more? Wondering if these were good dates and if I should change anything. Maybe make the area a little smaller? Let me know what you think. Thanks!

Had another hour long date yesterday outside. I took away all the boxes in hopes they would interact more, but they mainly just stayed on opposite sides of the pen. Any time Leo would hop close to Gibbs, Gibbs would hop away. They both seemed like they are a little scared of each other. Later on in the date Leo started to playfully chase Gibbs a little, but really just 2 hops towards him with ears forward and the second Gibbs would hop away Leo stopped chasing. I never had to intervene at all. Neither of them laid down but they groomed themselves and munched on grass.

Does this seem normal/good to have dates where they mostly don’t interact? Do I just keep doing it every day and increasing the time?

I think I’m going to try to have a date in the hallway outside our apartment instead of outside, neither of them have been out there and it’s around the same amount of space. Will try that tonight.

Awesome, thanks Dana! 

Had another good date last night, I used the hallway outside my apartment and they hung out there for 3 hours with no real fights, just a couple of 1 second tiffs from Leo. Gibbs is definitely scared of Leo and hops away the second Leo’s face gets near Gibbs. But immediately after a scare or a nip Gibbs would just lay down and seemed to relax. It seems like Leo would mostly charge at Gibbs if Leo was inside a box or tunnel and Gibbs would be close to the opening. Does this sound like Leo is territorial of the boxes/tunnels?

They both did multiple flops, but mainly on opposite sides of the area. Lots of grooming themselves and eating hay. I attached some photos from the date. At one point Leo was eating hay about a foot away from Gibbs and Gibbs was kind of frozen, but after a minute Gibbs got a little closer to the hay and started eating right across from Leo! Seems like this space works well and the buns seemed less stressed than they were outside in the grass.

Had another date Wednesday night, 3 hours again, pretty much the same thing happened. Every time Leo would get near Gibbs, Gibbs would hop away scared. At one point Gibbs put his head down in front of Leo, I assume he was asking for grooms, but Leo just lunged at him instead and Gibbs ran away. But still no fighting!

I noticed that Gibbs hadn’t been pooping and his stomach is very bloated. I was giving him a belly massage and could feel big lumps moving around. I gave him papaya and some oxbow digestive support and he had a lot of big soft poops in his room this morning, but he’s definitely still bloated.

When I first brought him home 2 months ago he went through stasis and I had to syringe feed him critical care multiple times a day and all that for while, the shelter told me they think he just doesn’t handle change that well because every time they moved him to a new place he wouldn’t eat for a while. It took him a month to eat/drink/poop normally after I got him. So now I’m worried that the dates are too stressful for him and he’s going to get constipated every time =(

Should I just give him a break from the dates for a few days? He was napping during the last date so I figured he wasn’t too stressed out haha.

I’m not sure how to tell if Gibbs is stressed, he seems to act the same no matter what. After dates he goes right back to laying down with his feet kicked out and napping, snacking on hay, etc.

His stomach still isn’t better, I gave him simethicone 3 times yesterday and massaged his stomach, it’s very firm and I hear a lot of gurgling noises when I put my ear against it. He managed to have a few very dark round poops last night and there were a lot more this morning. Stomach is still firm, but he’s still begging for food and eating/acting normally. I’m not sure if giving him greens will help or hurt. Some things say that greens help for constipation but might be bad for gas.

Unfortunately he won’t eat critical care on his own, is there anything I could mix it with that would make him like it? Otherwise I have to syringe feed it to him and that definitely stresses him out.

I haven’t had any more dates and I haven’t swapped their sides of the room just in case that would stress him out too.

I’ll definitely use that technique of 2 dates in a row and then take a day off, and also I won’t make the dates as long. I just need Gibbs’ stomach to get better, it’s stressing me out way too much

Thanks for all your help Dana!

He hadn’t pooped for 24 hours so that’s what I was most worried about and his stomach was getting really hard and sticking out. This has happened with him a few times since I got him (2 months ago). He won’t poop for a while and then when he does finally poop it’s really big soft poops that he steps on and get squished into the carpet. When I looked this up online, the advice was to get rid of greens and pretty much just give him hay (I still gave him a little pellets because the shelter told me he wasn’t a big hay eater) and I had finally gotten his poops to be normal for a week. Then I started the bunny dates and then he stopped pooping again.

So last night I gave him a piece of red leaf lettuce and this morning he had left me a bunch of really big soft poops all over my carpet, never been so happy to see poop haha. I’ll definitely try some fennel or mint and see if he likes that because I feel so bad not giving him greens, he loves them and has to watch Leo eat them every day. He hasn’t been eating as many pellets but I’m wondering if that’s because I’ve been giving him these Oxbow Digestive Support tablets, which he loves and thinks are treats. Hopefully when I get home today there are some harder poops. He seems like he just has a really sensitive stomach. His last owners fed him a lot of fruits and he was very overweight, I believe he’s at a normal weight now and I don’t give him any fruits, just a little papaya to help with digestion sometimes.

I got home and Gibbs had so many poops! Only a few soft ones and his stomach feels completely back to normal now. I’ll probably keep him off greens for a bit and then slowly add them in one by one so I can tell which ones upset his stomach. I think the probiotics sound like a great idea! I take them every day so it makes sense. Also, thanks for the link, I’ll have to try some of those!

We have had 3 more bunny dates, with a day off in between each one, Gibbs is still pooping and eating normally so thats great.

First of the 3 dates was 1.5 hours, Leo still hopping up to Gibbs and Gibbs hops away, Leo doesn’t keep trying and just eats hay or lays down. This happened a bunch of times, Gibbs just always keeping a few feet of distance between them and if Leo even looks at Gibbs from like a foot away he gets scared and runs away.

2 days later we have another date, this one was 2.5 hours. Same stuff happening. Just eating hay, laying down, pooping, and Leo will occasionally go over to Gibbs and Gibbs runs away, even if Leo is just going over to sniff him. I went in and pet Gibbs to try to make him less scared and Leo came over to him and was sniffing Gibbs’ butt for a while, pushing his nose into his fur and doing little nips but didn’t pull any fur out, and then seemed like he was trying to get under Gibbs’ tail, then Gibbs ran away. I also smooshed them together and pet them for 5 minutes, I took a picture because it was so cute (photo below). But once I stopped Leo would sort of turn his head and nip at Gibbs and Gibbs would run away.

Then yesterday we had a 5 hour date in the living room, which they have both been in before so I was worried Leo might be territorial, but they acted exactly the same as the other spaces. Same exact things happened. But when I was petting Gibbs and Leo came over to sniff his butt, Leo sniffed Gibbs for a little bit and then did a thump. What do you think that means? Then Gibbs ran away. I also smooshed them in this date for around 5 minutes, same thing happened and Gibbs ran away. They also both peed and pooped a lot during this date.

Is this helping them become friends? Should I do anything to make Gibbs less scared of Leo? Just wondering if I should change anything. Thanks!

I think I spoke too soon! I think we had a breakthrough last night! I smooshed them together again and petted them for a few minutes and then stopped. Then Leo started grooming Gibbs’ head! He groomed him for maybe 30 seconds and then put his head down asking for Gibbs to groom him back, and Gibbs wouldn’t so Leo just lunched at him with his nose and scared Gibbs away again. But Leo kept going back to groom his head a little bit and try to ask for grooms back from Gibbs. Does this mean that Gibbs is the dominant one since he got groomed first?

We had a few more short dates last week with the same behavior so this past weekend I decided to try really long sessions with them in the living room again. We had two 12 hour dates the past 2 days and they were great! Leo groomed Gibbs on and off all day, they took naps touching each other and just generally hung out near each other all day, no aggression at all. Gibbs hasn’t groomed Leo back at all but Leo doesn’t seem to mind, he just cleans himself right in front of Gibbs.

I’m wondering what the next step would be to getting them bonded. They are having the dates in a 5 x 5 foot area currently that is semi-neutral with one litter box, do I need to see what happens if I give them more space/less space? Are they ready to try to have a 48 hour session in the living room? Thanks!

I’ve attached some cute pictures from the dates this past weekend 

Leo grooming Gibbs with his paws up on his back

They both took naps like this, most of the time Leo sits in front of Gibbs.

Hanging out =)

This was towards the end of their last date

Aww thanks! I know, I can’t get over how cute they are together haha

Thanks Dana! When I do the 48 hours in the living room, would I need to immediately do the 24-48 hours in their final home? Or could I wait a week in between and do it the following weekend?

I was also wondering how I would feed them once they live together since Leo gets to eat more greens than Gibbs because of Gibbs’ sensitive stomach, and Gibbs gets more pellets than Leo since he’s twice the size? I only fed them snacks during the dates.

When I move them to the final home, do I need to limit the space at first and gradually increase it to the whole room? They have lost their litter box habits during all of this and I’m not sure how to get them to only use the litter box again. Thank you!