Bonding big bunny with little nippy scaredy bunny?

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BINKYBUNNY FORUMS

This topic has 16sd replies, 4 voices, and was last updated 6 years, 11 months ago by DanaNM.

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- 11/28/2017 at 3:02 PM
  Dee
  Participant
  704 posts
  Hi Everyone,
  So Lukie has finally recovered from his molar spur grinding, and I’ve heard from someone from one of the rescues about a potential bondmate for Luke. I’m a bit nervous about the 2+ hour round trip drive to meet ONE bunny if they don’t get along, especially since Luke gets very traumatized by car rides. But there doesn’t seem to be any rescues around with several bunnies in one place, which would be ideal. Anyway it will be well worth the trip if Lukie gets himself a wifey out of the deal! ?
  
  My concern is that Luke is only about 4lbs, and the bunny he is meeting is size “large” according to Petfinder. She is a Californian rabbit, and from what I know they’re usually over 10lbs. The lady from the rescue says she is very nice and really wants a bunny friend ?. She sounds so sweet, and she is not territorial or aggressive from what they have seen with other rabbits. Obviously they must put their foster bunnies with other rabbits to determine firsthand if they would be good bondmate material or better off solo, so I trust their information. I’ve even said before that I think Lukie either needs a tiny little bunny even more timid than him, or a big friendly bunny who won’t get upset or intimidated by his nipping and lunging.
  
  I’m just apprehensive that since Luke can be a little turd with other rabbits when he’s scared, the big bunny might get angry and hurt him. Or if there is a minor scuffle that would be no huge deal between two similarly sized rabbits, Luke could end up seriously hurt simply because he is so little. I’m already an overprotective mama with my Lukie and I’m afraid this will add a whole other element to my craziness ?.
  
  To get some real life perspective, I would love to hear about other people’s experiences with major size differences between their rabbits. Thanks so much, everyone!!!☺
- 11/28/2017 at 3:45 PM
  DanaNM
  Moderator
  9054 posts
  Bertha and Bunston were a pair like this. She is 9 lbs, Bunston was only 3 lbs!
  
  He was also a timid guy, and defensive when scared, she is much more outgoing and chill. Their bond wasn’t easy, but I also had no idea what I was doing, and we didn’t let them pick each other via dating. Eventually though, they were glued at the hip and he worshipped her constantly.
  
  So, I wouldn’t worry about the size difference! The only thing is that he will be stressed out from the trip, so he may not behave as he normally would. Are you planning to have him meet a couple different rabbits?
  
  It will help to have the rescue staff who are experienced at bonding chaperone the date, as they are better at knowing when to intervene and when not to.
  
  . . . The answers provided in this discussion are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet. Seek the advice of your veterinarian or a qualified behaviorist.
- 11/28/2017 at 8:15 PM
  Dee
  Participant
  704 posts
  Hi Dana, thank you so much for sharing your story- good to hear that you had ultimate success ☺.I can’t believe it, but I use to call my bridge bunny Bunathon (close to Bunston!) and was thinking of the name Bertha if we adopt the Californian bunny we are going to see. Lol great minds think alike!
  
  It will definitely be helpful to have experienced bonders there- I wish I could bring one home with me for a few weeks ?. I’m not good at telling what is normal “rabbit language” and what is a fight developing, so I know I jump in WAAAY too much.
  
  We are only going to see the one bunny, which I’m kind of hesitant about. I guess they have all their bunnies in foster homes instead of a rescue, so only one at a time is available. Part of me wants to go because they could be a great match, but another part of me is thinking that is a really long ride for Luke just in the hopes that he will bond with the bunny.
  
  Another drawback on only seeing one rabbit is that I also think it would be helpful to watch him with a few different rabbits, to compare his reactions.
  
  You’re right on about Luke not acting like his usual self from the stressful trip. The last time I took Luke to adopt a wife for him, he was so terrified he just huddled in the floor and barely moved. He did start to relax a little but then got into a spat with the bunny he was with. Then they put Precious in (the bunny that died in Sept- they weren’t bonded). She immediately jumped on him and humped his head, which of course scared him even more. She wasn’t being hostile, she seemed to think Luke was a new toy lol.
  
  So I really don’t know if we will be able to tell if Luke even likes his potential wife. But as far as I know, this is the only way to do bunny dating!
  
  Btw, are the bunnies in your avatar Bertha & Bunston? What a cute couple ☺!!
- 11/28/2017 at 8:50 PM
  DanaNM
  Moderator
  9054 posts
  Thank you
  Bunston passed away about 1.5 years ago, but Bertha is now re-bonded with Moose. I can’t figure out a way to include all the fur-babes in my avatar, so I like to keep Bunston up there.
  
  I think in your case, if they ignore each other, that’s a good sign. Even better would be the CA girl (haha) relaxing around him. Does he calm down if you pet him?
  
  Also remember that every pair is different. Who knows, maybe this new lady will be so irresistible that he will come out of his shell a bit.
  
  If the first date goes OK, you might ask if they will let you foster the girl for a few weeks. This would allow you to do pre-bonding, and then some sessions on your own when they are more evenly stressed (or not stressed), to get a better sense of how they will be around each other.
  
  Our rescue let me do this with Moose and it worked out great.
  
  . . . The answers provided in this discussion are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet. Seek the advice of your veterinarian or a qualified behaviorist.
- 11/28/2017 at 10:35 PM
  Dee
  Participant
  704 posts
  I’m sorry about Bunston ?. Both of the bunnies in my avatar have passed- BunBun and Nelli, my original bunnies. They were such an easy bond, BunBun picked Nelli out and we brought her home, a little humping from BunBun, no agression on either side, and bonded! I didn’t know that wasn’t the way all rabbits were until I went to bond Nelli with Luke after Bun passed. Yikes!!
  
  Lol- the “CA girl” ?. Sounds so glamorous- maybe Lukie will be impressed! You’re right too- I think as far as the first meeting, relaxing would be a good start. I’m wondering if the CA girl just goes up and grooms other bunnies or what- they said that she really wants another bunny friend in her “profile”, so I’m curious how she gets that across. Hopefully not by head humping ???!!! Lol. I think Luke would love to be groomed, Precious groomed him once and it was probably the happiest moment of his little life- other than ones involving bananas, of course. And Lukie knows how to groom other bunnies- he actually groomed Precious a few times. It was all good as long as they were in a laundry basket, crowded together. Once they were able to hop around, Luke decided it was a bit much. He doesn’t do well with approaches- he lays back his ears, lunges and nips. He even used to- and occasionally still does- the “vicious bunny attack” move with me, minus the nip!
  
  Great idea about the fostering!! It will also pacify my husband because he disagrees that Luke needs another bunny, and is insisting that we not keep two single bunnies again. It really is kind of a pain to keep them separated for good, but even after Nelli and Luke, then Luke and Precious, didn’t seem like they would bond easily (or ever!), I didn’t have the heart to give them back. However, if Luke was miserable or terrified or if the CA girl decided she did not want another bunny friend after all and seemed intent on damaging little Luke, I would like the option of changing my mind. Even if they won’t do that though, I’ll still go for it if the 1st date looks promising ☺.
  
  Sorry for the long message- I seem to be unable to write to short messages. Thanks again for your help! ☺
- 11/29/2017 at 1:57 PM
  DanaNM
  Moderator
  9054 posts
  Good luck! I’d love to hear how it goes!
  
  . . . The answers provided in this discussion are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet. Seek the advice of your veterinarian or a qualified behaviorist.
- 11/30/2017 at 3:56 AM
  Dee
  Participant
  704 posts
  Thanks, Dana! The big day is Saturday. I hope Lukie does OK in the car- I feel almost cruel taking him on a 2+ hour round trip, but I’m trying to remind myself that if he gets a wife out of the deal it will be worth it ☺. It’s just that Luke is so sensitive, he shuts down and stops moving and eating when he gets upset. So hopefully all will go well!
  
  They did say I needed a separate carrier for the CA girl, which I never heard of. I was always told that the bunnies should ride home in the same carrier to comfort each other and form a better bond. BunBun and Nelli, Lukie and Nelli, and Lukie and Precious traveled home together. Honestly, if they are so aggressive toward each other that they can’t be in the carrier together, I don’t want to try to bond them ?. If course I’m buying and bringing an extra carrier, but I’m curious about that.
  
  I’ll keep you posted ?!
- 11/30/2017 at 4:09 AM
  Sirius&Luna
  Participant
  2320 posts
  I hope it goes well, and they at least tolerate each other at first sight!
  
  I personally have always thought it was dangerous to put them in the same carrier straight away. I think once you know they’re on the way to bonding its fine to do some car stress bonding, but you have no idea how the new bun will react to the stress of a car when you’re collecting them, so I agree, a separate carrier is best.
  
  When I was bonding Luna and Atlas there was absolutely no way I would have put them in the same carrier to begin with. I genuinely think Luna would have killed Atlas. Now though, they are very happy together
- 11/30/2017 at 6:36 AM
  sarahthegemini
  Participant
  5584 posts
  Bunnies should be in the same carrier to comfort one another AFTER they’re bonded. Putting 2 rabbits in the same one, right after meeting is not a good idea. You shouldn’t expect them to instantly be able to ride home together. If it were that simple, pre bonding wouldn’t be a thing
- 11/30/2017 at 6:43 AM
  Sirius&Luna
  Participant
  2320 posts
  Sarah, lots of rescues and bonding services do give that as advice though
  
  I was told that by the RSPCA (I didn’t end up adopting that bunny – it’s a long story), and when I took Luna and Atlas to the bonder she told me to try bringing them in one carrier, which I refused to do. Very dangerous advice for people that don’t know about bunnies.
- 11/30/2017 at 11:59 AM
  DanaNM
  Moderator
  9054 posts
  I’ve heard that some ppl do this as a way to start off bonding with a stress-bonding session, and I have seen that advice on many rescue’s bonding info pages.
  
  But I would only opt for that if you had a helper in the car with you there in case someone needs to intervene, and I would bring an extra just in case. Your car ride is very long, so that would be a long time for them to be together on the first date.
  
  Carriers are tricky too, because it can be hard to get in there to break things up if things get nippy.
  
  . . . The answers provided in this discussion are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet. Seek the advice of your veterinarian or a qualified behaviorist.
- 12/01/2017 at 9:03 PM
  Dee
  Participant
  704 posts
  That’s really interesting, because I always thought it was rather scary to put two unbonded bunnies in a carrier and drive home with them. However, it was recommended to me every time, and I figured that the rescue people knew more than me, so in they went! Bun Bun & Nelli (bonded after), Luke & Nelli (Nelli couldn’t stand Luke- never bonded) and Luke & Precious (never bonded). All had 1+ hour car rides together. I’m realizing now that I’ve been really lucky that nobody fought- they were apparently all too distracted/frightened about the car rides.
  
  The rescue where I got both Luke and Precious reccommended not separating the rabbits at all, even once home. She advised having a neutral space to put them in, and said to keep them together unless there was a big fight, to avoid having to reintroduce them.
  
  The rescue person that I adopted Nelli from advised separating them once we arrived home and doing the typical bonding. Bun and Nelli were the easiest bond ever, it was really love at first sight.
  
  Well I guess tomorrow is a moot point because Luke was acting weird with his food yesterday and today so I had to cancel AGAIN. I think he’s nervous because of road work outside our house so I’m not too frantic, but there’s no way I could take him on such a long trip unless he’s 100%. I’m too mortified to even attempt to reschedule, so I guess Luke will stay single a while longer.
- 12/02/2017 at 1:06 PM
  DanaNM
  Moderator
  9054 posts
  Awww bummer, feel better Luke!!
  
  I’ve had some conversations with my local rescue coordinator about bonding strategies, because the way that was recommended for Luke and Precious is not unheard of, but is not the approach she uses. Her opinion on it all was that there are many different ways of doing it, but some ways are more stressful for the rabbits than others, and also that she personally couldn’t handle the stress of that method! Often times the goal is to get the rabbits bonded as quickly as possible, but this is sometimes (not always) quite stressful for the bunnies.
  
  She was also just a lot more relaxed about things… in this case, the car ride would probably be fine, because most bunnies don’t fight in the car. It might speed up the bonding process, but might not make a huge difference in the long run. But for Luke, he would prob be pretty stressed from the day, so it might not be as good for his health. You can always take them on a car ride another day, once they are both settled and rested again.
  
  I think with bonding there is fine balance between tough love to get them to bond, but also making sure that both rabbits are not overly stressed about it.
  
  . . . The answers provided in this discussion are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet. Seek the advice of your veterinarian or a qualified behaviorist.
- 12/02/2017 at 8:05 PM
  Dee
  Participant
  704 posts
  Thanks, Dana. I’m really glad I didn’t take him out today because he’s acting really off tonight. Im worried it’s his molars again, although that would be unusual I guess it can happen if they need to be filed down further. He won’t eat his greens or pellets, and did even finish his bananas. This is so stressful, I’m really getting discouraged. I’m hoping he’s just acting weird because I put up the Christmas tree, but I doubt it.
  
  I agree with you about the fine line with bonding. And of course it depends on the rabbits involved. Thats one problem with bonding Luke, just picked him up to put him with another bunny is a major source of stress. But I guess at this point, I shouldn’t even think,if bonding him until we figure out his health. Ugh, I really though he was all better. At least until his next molar trim
- 12/03/2017 at 2:13 AM
  DanaNM
  Moderator
  9054 posts
  Ugh, so sorry. Does he take critical care readily? Maybe he’s gassy?
  
  Poor guy, hope he perks up soon.
  
  (((Luke)))
  
  . . . The answers provided in this discussion are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet. Seek the advice of your veterinarian or a qualified behaviorist.
- 12/04/2017 at 2:05 PM
  Dee
  Participant
  704 posts
  Sorry I didn’t reply sooner, just crazy busy first with Luke then with work! He finally started perking up very late that night, and by yesterday he was acting fine! I don’t think it’s his teeth again, because he went back to eating hay when he was better. Yay! Still not sure what his little problem was though ?. Gas would be the usual suspect, but since he would still eat a little and wasn’t pressing his belly to the floor, I didnt think so. I’ve narrowed it down to: I gave him a pinch of this Zen Tranquility Flower mix from Pet Select that he never had before, maybe it didnt agree with him, OR I put up the Christmas tree therefore disrupting his living room, OR I offered him a little bowl water with a bit of Apple juice because he wasn’t drinking very much and maybe that reminded him of when he was sick and I was giving him meds. The latter is kinda farfetched being as we are dealing with a brain the size of a walnut (sorry, Luke!) but I noticed he was acting REALLY afraid of me every since the Apple juice. He hopped forward, sniffed the bowl, and recoiled like it was going to bite his nose off, then wouldn’t,let me get near him until yesterday. Even treats has to be put down, then after I backed off he would take them. Strange animal.
  
  I’m going to wait a week to make sure Luke’s health it’s stable, then maybe see If there is a nearby bunny he could meet. I was really hesitant to make such a long trip, since there was no guarantee of a match, and now I don’t dare try to make plans to meet up with the foster mom of the CA girl since I cancelled 3 times! Once for Luke not feeling well after his molar trim, one for my car being in the shop, and again for Luke being sick. I felt so bad- hate breaking plans ?. But with Luke being so nervous, I think we are better off staying closer. I wish I could just bring a bunny home to him- You brought up the idea of fostering the CA girl, and if there were any foster bunnies available around here that would be a great idea. I’ll check around a bit more. I wouldn’t mind making a long trip, it’s just that Luke would ?.
  
  Well, off to work again- hope you had a great weekend! ?
- 12/04/2017 at 3:45 PM
  DanaNM
  Moderator
  9054 posts
  Aww, very glad Luke is feeling better!
  
  Hopefully the right match for him will materialize!
  
  . . . The answers provided in this discussion are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet. Seek the advice of your veterinarian or a qualified behaviorist.
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