As some of you may know/remember, I had a sick parrot I was caring for a couple months ago. I had him since I was 12 years old & am now 24. He’s never once in his life been sick & he suddenly became very ill with a GI Infection & gout. After finding that he had both of these, the vet still sounded hopeful but said that he would live with gout the rest of his life. The medication for gout had a horrible effect on him & sent him to a plucking fit. I spent sleepless nights trying to sleep with him cuddled next to me just so I could try & keep him from plucking more.

He was really weak this one night so I got him to the vet first thing in the morning who said they wanted to hospitalize him for the ay so they could give him 4 tube feedings throughout the day. By evening they called to tell me he was doing well, he had 1 more tube feeding & that I could come pick him up shortly. My mom & I were a little late from traffic getting there. Soon as we got there, they called us into one of the rooms & informed us that they gave Kramer his last tube feeding but when they came back to check on him he had passed away. It’s been 2 months since he passed. I didn’t feel like doing much of anything after & even writing about it now still feels like the day I heard those words. They let us spend some time with him before we left.They cut the band around his foot off & I now wear it on a necklace.

He had such a short life compared to what he should’ve had, what I always expected him to have. He was going to be 13 in September, should’ve lived till at least 25-30. I hoped to still have him around by the time I had a family. I hoped to still be dealing with the annoying screams every single day, his stubbornness, his pickiness, & his goofiness that was all just like me. Our pets are so much more than pets. We sang together, danced together, made stupid silly noises together. He was my baby, my best friend. He annoyed the heck out of me but I’d trade everything to have it all back.

This year has been so tough & it is so far by far my least favorite. He was not what makes me whole, but he was such a huge part of me. It’s empty & so quiet without him. I’ve had him for half of my life & figuring out who I am without this little green thing has been so difficult. We never truly heal from losing loved ones, we simply learn how to live without them. To anyone who has lost a best friend, whether it be a person or a pet, I am so sorry & words can’t fix the pain you feel but my heart goes out to you in this difficult time.

Fly free, Kramer. I will always miss you.