Wait? What? Did I completely miss something? Or was this really that sudden? OMG, that is so sad for you TL and the bunnies. There is no winning here. I’m sorry. =(

How much does he care about the rabbits? What I’m wondering is how willing he is to do what is best for them. Would he be open to contributing to their care so they can all stay together? In the meantime, perhaps you can secure some pet insurance for them.

If he would not be open to such an arrangement, then it might be best for you to each take a manageable number.

Any chance he would be willing to kick in on vet bills if you took them all so they didn’t have to be split (kinda like child support)? What about pet insurance plus Care Credit? Tucker would be the hardest one to get pet insurance on (have yo have had the bun for 3 (?) months first and the current illness would be a pre-existing condition, but future stuff would be covered. Pet insurance isn’t 100% but it’s there for the “big” stuff. While we all hope our bunnies live long happy healthy lives, we know they don’t live forever so him at least being a part of the financial backup plan since they’re half his shouldn’t be too big of a “commitment” for him (personally, I think he should help out financially with food, hay, etc. but that’s just me). If you were in the reverse situation where he had all or most of the buns, wouldn’t you do whatever you could to help out if something happened with the group?

I can’t help but say that with your concerns about medical stuff… did you figure in what you’d be able to handle just with general care on a day to day basis alone? In a fantasy if nothing went wrong medically with our buns, would that change your options? Seven rabbits seem like a lot for one person to handle to me, even if money wasn’t in the equation.

I know you love all of them, but considering your options, is there ONE rabbit you just couldn’t bear to let go? I think I’d start with that one, and visualizing new bonds from there.

I’m so very sorry and am thinking of you.

Hm. Tough situation. I would think with your life stress and money issues, splitting them up would probably be easiest. Though, it will stress them out, if they keep their closest bond mate and you do it the easiest way for them, they should adjust. Seven sounds like a lot to handle alone.

If you think you can handle seven and he would be willing to help out with their care, then you could try that. I would just worry handling seven would be too much for a single person. What if all seven get ill and, even if you can afford it, need special care? That is a lot of bunnies to medicate and monitor alone.

Sorry about the break up. I know they are hard. Take care of yourself.

TL, if splitting them will ease the stress on you, even if only physically, then that’s what you may have to do. If you think that you can physically and financially handle the 5 then do that. I do think Stickerbunny is right. The ones that are still together will lean on each other. A split will be stressful on you and on the buns, but each group will likely be fine. I hate that you’re having to even think about this at all and can totally understand you not wanting to have to count on the bf financially. I know you love all the buns dearly, but ultimately you’re going to have to do what will work for you all around.

I’m sorry to hear this Tanlover. I think it’s not such a big risk to split a large group up quite honestly as it would be bonded pair or trio. That can be the “beauty” of having a warren or large group.

It sounds as if you are aware of who is most bonded to who and that is pretty much the right decision.

Oh TL, I am so sorry. :'(
The rabbit rescue I vollunteer at had a group of seven bunnies that came in together, and since nobody was going to adopt all seven, they split them up into trios/pairs and that was just fine.

I think as practice you should start separating the groups now. Play out all the ways you could separate them and see which way works best.

TL, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for it to sound like that. I’m just shocked. I remember you saying something, but it was mixed in with all the other stressful things in your life. You have way too much on your plate as it is, so this breakup is going to be especially hard. You no longer have that person to lean on and help you cope with all the other things. It is concerning for me. Anyway, I truly am sorry. I hope things work for you one way or another.

As for the bunnies, I agree with the others. If you don’t want to risk the possibility of him not providing support/assistance, then it would be best to place them where you know they will be taken care of. If you can handle five, then take them and leave him with the other two. I don’t think it will be as traumatic for them as you think. It isn’t like you are splitting them up into singles. They will still have someone with them to help them cope. And as well as they seemed to be bonded as a group, I’m sure some of the individual bonds are not that strong. It sounds like you know who should be with who. They may surprise you and act as if they didn’t care about the missing members of the group enough to be sadden by their absence. Hopefully that makes sense.

You know them best. If there are some strong bonds there that are obvious, then I don’t see any reason to experiment. If adjustments need to be made later, then you can cross that bridge when it comes.

TL – I think that’s a good idea. I would think the flipping back and forth would be stressful to them, best to get them used to the change once.

As for the friends thing – I have remained friends with an ex before. It took a little bit of not associating with each other to get over the worst of the negative feelings, but it worked out and we stayed friends. Don’t be afraid to say “I need some time” if you need it, it doesn’t mean the relationship has to be over, just … sometimes it’s best to get over them and move on before you go to the friends and hanging out stage.

I’m excited for your new move. A fresh start! Time will definitely heal, and I’m sending vibes your way as you adjust. I agree with Stickerbunny too. Definitely don’t be afraid to take an extra step back while you heal. I’ve managed to remain good friends with most of mine.

I agree with LBJ and Stickerbunny. You are taking the best approach. I know it hurts now, but time really will help.

So glad you found a nice apartment, and glad you have been able to find a way to still have all of the bunnies in your life. I know your heart is broken right now, but pushing forward, focusing on what you need to do, and leaning on your buns and friends when you need to is the best thing for you right now.

What a horrible situation. I’m sorry you’ve had to go though this. You’ve managed it well and I think you’ve done the best for your buns. Moving forward will help immensely and as the others suggested it might be good to take a break from the ex while the worst of the hurt passes. That’s entirely up to you though.

Keep being strong. ♥

OK… Here’s another option but one you would have to discuss… If you wanted to keep all would your Xpartner be willing to contribute to a community fund for the bunnies to go toward emergency medical costs and some of their up keep ? Is he able and willing to take some of the buns and if he is travelling does he have the time to commit to them if he does.. something that must be considered as if he intends returning them to your care whilst he travels then it might be better for you to take custody and basically get bunny support (in an amicable manner)

Speak to your vet and the rescue you work for and see if they would be willing to aid you with a payment plan or reduced costs if something happens medically that you need support with.

Hang in there…. Life is never going to be easy and just when you think it’s fallen into place everything shifts…. Good and Bad can disrupt our journey but we have to carry on… Sadly you have shared so much together you are going to need to be in contact with dividing things so it’s going to be hard… I thought that you both owned the condo, that is something that will need to be addressed and if it can be kept amicable is the best but you still need to make sure that if you have put money into the home that you are not left out of pocket… Furniture, whitegoods etc, shared possessions will need to be divided fairly as it should not be down to one to bare the costs alone of starting a new. I am sure you can do this without conflict and you need to as if it is not addressed it is an issue that can fester and become an obstacle later on…

Have you found a place that will allow your extra furry tenants? That would be a concern for to.

I think the plan you’ve come up with is a good one. A starting point and way forward. With groups, the dynamics are different and I think a split is not traumatic to them like a seperation of just a pair that were still close would be. All your rabbits will still have a familiar companion to take comfort in during this transition.

Even if situation were different, there might of been a point down the track where you had to divide your group just because an individual bunnys need. Like Tucker atm. Or if another became poorly or aged and became stressed within an active group.

Even with a new environment, a group of 7 or just the 4 + 1 may have some squabbles to settle. But you know what you’re doing there!!

A couple years ago a looked after a friend large group while she went o/s. They went into neutral space at my place &because they had already be living together, I didn’t think there would be any issues. I was wrong! The larger space, despite being neutral caused several challenges among them. It really stressed me out.

They werent like your group though as there were some intact buns in the mix and double the numbers. Ugh.
Anyway, I’m rambling.

Another benefit of smaller numbers between you is being able to handle them in an emergency situation. I know you’ve discussed the importance of emergency plan before so I won’t add much more.

Regarding the lease, will you be able to get the rabbits written into it? I believe RabbitPam has done this several times. Where there was “no pets” meaning cat or dog, they did allow small pets and she had it written in as a safeguard.

I’m happy to read you’ll be able to have some time with Simba & Lacey. I hope you’ll be able to arrange to visit them when you’re missing them too. And vice versa for Aaron & the ones in your care also. It seems there is a lot of mutual respect and that gives me hope things will remain amicable between you.
Thinking of you a lot TL!

I’m very sorry to hear this, TL!

I have no advice about splitting bunnies, but agree with Samicles that it would be best to split them now if it’s inevitable.

If you have any doubt about him continuing to care for the ones he would take, you should consider other options beyond splitting the seven between you two. It is very hard right now, so you may wish to consult a local rabbit expert. Maybe the rescue you got the lionheads from would have a bunny expert who would be willing to just help you go over options. It’s very hard to do when you’re in the situation.

Seven does seem like a lot for one person, even six does.

As for emergency care, I recommend just saving a set amount of money each month. I do not have pet insurance, but do that, and have always managed to afford emergency vet bills for my pets.

Good luck!

If the decision is firm, I agree it might be a good idea to start to have them in the 2 groups while they’re still in familiar environment. It will be a good trial up see how they do.

And you know what? This may sound silly but tell them what’s going on. What will be happening…Sure you may feel silly too but there’s nothing to lose. I tell my buns when I’m heading out sometimes and that ill be seeing them soon.

Jersey -I do the same thing and I swear they listen! When something new is going on, Marlee will not budge until I tell her it’s ok. Every morning before I leave for work I tell them all to be good bunnies! We had long talks about peeing in the potty, etc.

Flooring . . . that would depend on whether or not they are chewers. Sheet vinyl remnant (check flooring & carpet stores — we got a piece that was something like 5 ft x 25 ft for $45 & it was the thicker kind that had texture so it wasn’t slippery when we made Kieko’s condo), indoor/outdoor carpet (Lowes, Home Depot), rubber mat (rubberflooring.com but kinda expensive).

Animals have a way of sensing things. I think your tans were telling you that they love you and that everything will be ok.

Tanlover – oh no!!! My heart goes out to you. I think you have some great advice here, and I can’t even get 2 of my 3 bonded – so I’m no use to you on that front. I want to say though that you are doing the best thing you can given your circumstances.

That is so sweet about the Tans. They’re so intelligent.

I’ve always used vinyl under pens. I get cheap thin stuff (but not the kind that smells) and I flip it upside down. The back is slightly textured and still washable.

This is right side up:

And this the textured back:

I get it at the big hardware stores and its about $10/ broadloom metre. (About 6ft wide?)

If using vinyl, be sure it’s wider then the pens and that the pens can’t be pushed out of shape. Because I guarantee you, if they can get up the edges, they’ll chew it up!

Once settled, I am considering fostering as it is something I have always wanted to do and have been unable to while living with my boyfriend.

Do the rescue groups you work with offer rabbit sitting services to help bring income for them?
That might be another thing you could do.

Speaking from experience…fostering often ends in the fosterer adopting. And it can be difficult to detach from the ones fostered that move on. But you know your limits.
The majority of my buns were ones I thought I could foster but I inevitably couldn’t let them go. Hope you’re stronger them me! Lol.

The only rabbits I have stay with me now are ones that already have homes. They come if owners need pet sitting or I’m helping with bonding.

ETA: the vinyl I’m mentioned before, I meant was $10 linear metre, the width being around 6ft.

That’s the direction I’m heading in. So many of our rescue foster carers get stuck when they need to go on holidays and there are always various group members looking for sitters or boarding.

Bunny sitting services is a great idea — whether at the sitter’s place or “pop in” services to feed, water, change litter, etc at the buns’ homes. I would love it if we had someone around here that I could trust with my bunnies. As it stands, I can’t go away for one night . . . I don’t know that I would be comfortable even having my son take care of our babies and one of them is “technically” his!
Definitely something you’d be great at TL and an easy way to make xtra $!!

What i was referring to is on behalf of a rescue. So pet owner paying a rescue organisation either to have them at a facility or with their foster carers. So it would still be voluntary work to help an organization out.

But doing personal bunny sitting for a fee is certainly a good idea!

Sorry Jersey, I got excited at the idea of a rabbit savvy person watching bunnies and got carried away! The only person I know around here who has bunnies is the breeder that I got Marlee and Moshi from and . . . I’d leave them in my son’s care before I’d go that route!

All good!

So sorry TL! I’ve been crazy busy with work and I missed this post. I’m really sorry to hear.

Oh TL I am so sorry. I think you made the right decision concerning the buns. Were there any other apartments that appealed to you?

TL I am sorry to hear what you are going through. I am curious too if you are able to find another apartment available as well. You are in my thoughts and I hope things get better for you and the buns soon.

So they don’t have any other units available?

I hope you get it! I wish you lots of luck!

I am glad to hear you got a place!

I haven’t been on here in a while, I came for bonding advice and saw this…
so so sorry you have to go through this stress. I hope the new place is fabulous. I’m glad you got to keep the majority of the buns. I’m sure it was super difficult, but at least you’ll still get to see them, and maybe he can send pics/updates. I’d be heartbroken, but also know it’s for the best.
I hope you’re doing okay!