Sorry to hear that. I was never aware of homeschoolers when I was in school in the Dark Ages…I don’t think it was as prevalent as it seems to be today. I believe we do have a few forum members who are homeschooled so hopefully they can reply and help you with your issues.

I read a blog, mostly for the career type posts, but the author has an entire section on homeschooling and why she thinks it’s the only way to raise kids (for the record, she just started it this year after a lot of research, so she’s found a lot of evidence that was compelling to her). Maybe reading some of the studies she posts about how great it is at preparing kids for the world will make you feel better. According to her, kids need to lead their studies and learn about things that really interest them, rather than wasting time in classes and doing homework. I’m not sure I 100% buy it yet as the solution to our country’s education problems, but I do think it has definite merits.

Her website is http://www.penelopetrunk.com and there’s a button for the homeschooling section along the top.

I’m homeschooled and when people (aka MY OWN FAMILY! ugh) start that I just smile and politely listen. When they’re done I just sit there for a second and then launch a calm, quiet logical debate. I’m terrible. But, I have perfect grades and tons of extra curriculars. Actually, that’s why my mom took me out of school. I was being way held back due to the ‘no child left behind’ program. I was in 3rd grade and just starting decimals at the end of the year *grr* I refused to do my homework since I knew it! With kids my own age my social skills are a little rough, but I’ve always been like that. Even in school. With adults I sound like an adult due to the fact that I hang out with adults all of the time. Also, you shouldn’t have to know about all the lovliness that happens in this world in grade school. Or even middle school. High school, yes. But any younger? Not really. And just ignore their comments and work on proving them wrong.

You have a GREAT education, probably better than most public schoolers due to the fact that your parents were teaching you and tailoring your curriculum to you. No one else. Just you. I have one friend who just doesn’t get it. I finally just gave up and ignored it. She has now gotten over herself. It just took her seeing my life and how my nice my home life is. Her family is very rarely in the same room together while my family is so tight knit and have about a bazillion inside jokes. Oh, and it’s up to us to demonstrate how amazing us homeschool kiddos are We completely, 100% rock. Yep, we’re awesome.

I don’t know anyone who was homeschooled. I don’t think I was really aware that there was a such thing. I’m mean, I knew there was a such thing but I never really thought about it. I certainly wouldn’t have seen it as an insult or anything. What your describing is what I would equate to the “only child” thing. When I was in school, kids thought that if you were an only child then you were spoiled and snotty. I remember the teacher putting us in groups to work on a project. Someone just decided that the group would do this. I had ideas and wanted them to be considered. When I tried to get a word in, a girl turned to me and asked “are you an only child?”. I said no. Then she said “well it sure seems that way”. She meant it as an insult. Perhaps “homeschooled” has replaced “only child”?

I have been homeschooled my whole life and both my sisters were as well. People always say how they wished they were homeschooled so the only had an hour of school a day and I am like “That is not true! It takes me an hour just to do one subject!” People always say how we aren’t socialized but that is not true! We are very socialized! I just tend to hang out with other homeschoolers as most public school kids seem to be immature and talk about things that are not appropriate! We are not sheltered at all! My dad is computer techy therefor our family owns 6-7 computers, we have ipods and other digital devices and we aren’t spoiled as we have to pay for anything we want out of our own money. Sure we might not now all of the newest hits on the radio, but that doesn’t mean I am sheltered! Just means I chose not to listen to that kind of junk!

know what,, no matter where youre schooled,, you’re going to be depressed some of the time.
being a teenager is a just a rollercoaster of emotions, and it doesn’t take much to set you cascading in either direction.
sometimes you just want to sleep it off,, cry it off,, lose yourself in music, or play video games. any of those is perfectly acceptable.

just know that as you get older, the intensity of the moods will subside, stuff will affect you less, and you’ll be well on your way down the happy path of not giving a $*&!.

Longhairmike, that is so true! Good point and well said.

If/when I have kids, I’ll be damned if I am putting them in public school. Home schooled all the way. With how packed classes are getting, violence in schools, the lack of attention kids get in class… there’s no way I’d subject a child to that.

So how does homeschooling work? Does one parent have to stay home then? What about families where both parents work?

I think in general, there is a lot of misunderstanding on both sides.

In the 18 years now that I’ve been in school (jeez it’s been a while) I’ve only ever attended public institutions…never private. And though I know that public schools are a problem in some areas, I was lucky enough that my local public schools had teachers that really cared about their students pushed us to excel. In fact, my friends and I agree that we worked harder in high school than we did in college! If I had kids, I wouldn’t for a moment hesitate to send them through the same system.

I think the problem is that some people on both sides of this issue have very narrow opinions on what homeschooling or public schooling is about.  In reality, there’s a huge range of differences within either of these education methods and how “good” either method is depends a lot on individual basis…there are great and terrible examples of both.  Just as not all home-schooled kids are sheltered and lazy, not all public schools are programs that lack sensitivity to individual students and are full of immature crude kids.

One of my really good friends was home schooled and had some trouble getting into college because of it. She is the smartest person I know and while I don’t think I will home school my kids( I went to public schools and loved it) I don’t believe that a home school kid should be picked on for it. It is the parents choice and it works for some people. I also think that it is pretty sad that many colleges make it harder for a home schooled kid to get in. She had trouble since she doesn’t have paper work for her classes she took. She was also sad she never walked across a stage an got a diploma, but she just graduated college and was the happiest person there!
Keep your chin up, no matter what you do, someone will find a way to knock you down!

Homeschooling isn’t for everyone, but I’ve seen it done in very positive ways.  

One of the most mature young ladies I’ve ever known was home-schooled (along with her sisters) and she got a full music scholarship to Boston College.   She then left school after 2 years to join a bluegrass band (she’s a fiddler), and has traveled the world.  I just got word today that she and her husband just bought a house.  She knows that school will still be there when she is ready, but she knows that this was an opportunity that wasn’t going to wait for her.

Both of her sisters handled the transition to college very well, as they already had the maturity and self-discipline to handle themselves.  One went local, and another went away to the east coast.

Especially nowadays when the news is full of stories of just how awful the public schools can be, the idea of homeschooling is becoming more attractive to more mainstream parents.  It will also depend on how you “sell it” in applications.  You can stress your experience with challenging yourself and the fact that you have had the freedom to pursue concentrations or areas of study that you might not have had the chance to in a public school system.

So while it could be a bit of a harder sell to some more ‘traditional’ colleges, there are many more progressive institutions that welcome students from a homeschooling setting and recognize the advantages of the individual attention that some students can get in a non-traditional setting.

Posted By LBJ10 on 05/09/2012 03:55 PM

So how does homeschooling work? Does one parent have to stay home then? What about families where both parents work?

Home schooling works this way (by law, at least in Florida where I grew up) – once a year you take a test on Math and English. If you pass, you get to stay in homeschooling. If you don’t pass, you go into “probation” and are tested for psychological/developmental issues and the person who is testing you decides if you have to go to public school or not (social worker comes out to the house and such).

As for the rest – it is totally up to the family. Home schooling CAN be a lot easier than public school. If the parents let it. Both my parents worked, so I mostly learned on my own – they took turns at work (one worked nights, one days) so we’d have an adult home, but when they were home they were asleep 90% of the time so homework was me and my brother and the internet (after I was 12 and got it).

I was home schooled my whole life, I never went to public school. My mother bought us the books at the school book store, so we were on the same subjects as the school kids. I remember in 1st and 2nd grade I would finish my entire work books in a week and the rest of the year I was completely off because I knew the subjects so well. When I went to take the tests, I got 9s across the board (top score).  So there is some truth in the stereotype, depending on the student and parents. 

I really can’t get mad at people who say I have it easier cause I was home schooled. Yes getting into a university is a bit more of a pain (no high school clubs etc, no teachers references from high school, things like that) and I ended up going to a community college to start just to pad my applications. But, my high school diploma test was so stupid, it was easier than anything public school would give. My mother found this religious school that does tests via mail and they sent me a work book and a test. ALL of the answers to the test were in BOLD in the work book so I just scanned the book for bold and finished the test in about an hour. Sent it in, two weeks later I had a high school diploma as good as any other. I couldn’t believe that test, I could have done it when I was 10.

 But, having easier options doesn’t mean every one takes advantage of them. *shrug* And it doesn’t mean academic ability suffers. I made 90%-100% on my tests in college my first semester and made the Deans List. Only subject I really struggled with was Algebra, but my whole family does, no surprise there. haha I hate math.

 Don’t let people get to you. You can do every bit as much as anyone who went to “a real school” and those who wish they had been home schooled do have _some_ truth to their statements. So it’s best to just brush off the comments and explain how you do things if they’re interested, else, the only people who it concerns are you, your parents and the school you apply to.

That’s interesting. I wish I would have been homeschooled. I suffered years of torment at school. Seeing this makes me feel like things could have been way different. My mom would have never wanted to homeschool us though. LOL

Yeah, public school sounds no fun tbh. Bullying, fighting, bleh. My brother actually got put into time out by a teacher and the teacher gave my mother a huge lecture when he was five (he was in public school for a few weeks) because he… told the teacher his classmate was running with a pair of metal scissors and didn’t want the kid to poke out his eye, because he knew it wasn’t safe to do. The kid with the scissors just got them taken away, the “tattle tale” got after school punishment and a parent/teacher visit. o.O That and him never getting to actually eat lunch because he didn’t woof down his food made my mother take him out.

Home schooling isn’t for everyone, or for all parents, but if I have kids… it’s either going to be a good private school or home school. I dislike what I have heard about public schools, especially lately.

Oh jeez Sticker, that sounds like a totally unfair reaction on the part of the teacher : (.

I just want to say though, give public schools a chance – since when has the media ever said anything positive about anything? There are really some dedicated teachers and good public schools out there…it’s a shame for the terrible schools to ruin the reputation of the whole system.

You’re right Peppypoo. I think I got a pretty good education. There were some “unfair” teachers, but there were also some really nice teachers. I remember one taking me to see a movie. She picked me up at my house and paid for it out of her own pocket. She did that a lot, with kids she felt needed to feel a little more special. I guess she recognized the difficulties I was having with my peers. I just can’t imagine how bad it is now that there are all these new ways to torment each other through cell phones and social media.

Ironically I want to be a teacher in one of those “overcrowded” public schools. For all the complaining people do about them, they are the reality for most people. Most parents both have to work, quite a few simply don’t have the education themselves to teach their children (some don’t even know English!), and I strongly feel like I can offer a fun, interactive learning environment for my students that most would not be able to experience if their education was left up to their parents.

I was homeschooled after 3rd grade. I think my mom wanted to stay home with us. Thankfully my dad had an income that let her do that. I got to start going to college when I was in 10th grade, my sister got to start in 9th. They don’t even let kids do that any more! I will be honest, homeschooling wasn’t that hard for me. My parents didn’t do it so I would be some genius, or for religious reasons. I honestly think it was just what my mom was interested in doing. I could see myself wanting to do the same for my children, especially with a background of a teacher, but at the same time, I don’t think that my boyfriend would be okay with me being a stay at home mom, no matter how much money he will make.

peppy, it’s not media coverage that concerns me. I have talked to social workers (my ex’s mother was one) and teachers (my current boyfriend’s mother is(was) a teacher, all my ex’s mother’s friends were teachers) etc. Most my friends are pretty fresh out of high school since I am in the lower end of 20s. I do not like at all what our education system is doing lately (like abeautiful said, students get held back due to certain changes). Plus, violence in schools where I grew up was very common and every one I know was beat up at least once (physically) in high school. And you HAVE to do each class and all homework to get good grades, even if you know all the material already. My boyfriend knew a lot about history and his teacher would even talk to him after class because he knew so much they could have an intelligent conversation. But, because he knew the material, he didn’t want to sit through each and every class, or do the homework since he didn’t need it. So he got a D, but got an A on all tests (he always showed up for test day to prove a point) and his teacher admitted he knew it really well and if he had done his homework and showed up for class, he would have gotten an A. That just seems silly to me. I always skipped English because I knew it, so I focused on working on what I didn’t know, having to sit through a class on stuff I know would have driven me insane. I want my kids to have that freedom, my boyfriend agrees, because that is why he hated school.

Now, not to say public schools aren’t good for a lot of people. There are a lot of good teachers out there who care. And not all schools have the violence my local ones did. Not all parents can work out having their kids at home during the day, due to work schedules or whatever. But, for me, I already don’t have to work if I don’t want to because boyfriend makes enough. If we have kids, we are strong in the subjects the other is weak in. A lot of his family is in Education / Social Work and I will be going back to school shortly for Early Childhood Education with a focus on deaf education. So I just feel like for me, public school is not the best option when I have kids. Plus, I have already been through home schooling, so I know the system and tips on making it work.

School isn’t just about learning the material, it’s learning a work ethic too. Thus the going to classes and doing homework

Stickerbunny – It’s interesting that you bring up violence. There was violence at my high school. Almost every day, you would be trapped in the hallway (they were so packed full people and if everyone stopped, you couldn’t really get out) because of some fight just spontaneously breaking out. It was mostly racial problems, people not liking other people. There wasn’t really any violence to speak of in elementary or middle school. Kids were mean, they would tease you and say the most awful things to you. They would follow you home and taunt you the entire way. But not a lot of bullies actually beat anyone up. I guess I did get slammed into a locker once, but that was it. The mental abuse it what really got to me. I didn’t even want to go to school on most days, especially toward the end.

I was homeschooled for 2 years. I didn’t like it, but that was just me, its not for everyone, but my older brother was homeschooled from 7 to 12 grade and I have 2 friends that were homeschooled their whole life, and honestly, you can’t tell. Their social skills are perfectly fine. They hung out with friends just like anyone else. And if anything, my friends (who are brothers) have such a great relationship with their parents, something you don’t see much of nowadays..there are definately pros and cons to both public school and homeschool. Anyone who jumps to conclusions right away when they find out you were homeschooled obviously is closeminded. Don’t let it bother you. The world will always be full of those types of people who stereotype, so don’t let it get you down. You don’t have to defend yourself, especially if you know your right, but just be firm in who you are, and that is what people will notice and what will make them think, “Wow…I guess I was wrong about this person.” Trust me, I understand where your coming from. Life is too short to waste our energy worrying about stupid people

Posted By Monkeybun on 05/09/2012 11:03 PM

School isn’t just about learning the material, it’s learning a work ethic too. Thus the going to classes and doing homework

Work ethic imo is learned better from the parents. Kids routinely have behavioral issues and get bad grades if they become bored in the class. They act up, goof off, because they know it and day in day out no challenges is very bad for the human mind. Boyfriend couldn’t do work in school but he works 60-70 hour weeks and has gotten 3 promotions in two years, so no loss of work ethic from him not doing home work or classes.

LBJ : Yes it varies by school what violence you have to put up with. My friends from good public schools had to put up with some teasing, but violence beyond that got smashed by teachers (mostly). In the small schools it varies. My home town high school had stabbings, shootings and one time a girl threw acid in another girls face for being prettier, in a town of 130k so not a big city but lots of violence. My boyfriend went to a huge school, but he saw teachers ignore three boys beating up another one and just walk on by. My ex went to a very good, large public school and he had acne, he was obese, he looked like a 10 year old – but he didn’t get teased even and he loved school socially. So it seems like kind of a luck of the draw where you live. The mental abuse can be just as bad as the physical though.

Just to add to the debate, I think there are some fantastic public and private schools out there and public schools can offer a lot more than many private schools can in terms of opportunity and clubs (my small private high school had zero music program, for example). I think it’s impossible to say what the best option is since there are so many variables. I also think a percentage of kids will do well in any environment, so it’s easy to hear someone say “Well, my smart kid did awesome even though he went to a horrible public school/awesome public school/high end private school/tiny private school/was homeschooled/etc” Some kids will thrive no matter what (maybe 10%? 20% I’m not sure what that percentage is). I think it’s much trickier when it comes to the kids who won’t thrive in any environment because then it’s up to the parents to look at the options available and choose the best option.

When I have a kid(s) I will most likely send them to public school. The public schools where I live are pretty decent and I don’t know that we could afford private – with limited resources I’d rather save that money for college. Both DH and I will have to work full time, 9-5 jobs, so homeschooling is probably out, but I think it has merits. Like I said though, this could all change depending on the kid.

Yes, there are some good public schools out there and for a lot of people it is a very good option. Work issues, money issues, or simply so their kid can get the social experience they liked as a kid in school (cheer leading, or be on the football team, whatever). Plenty of Ivy League students went to public school. It is purely up to the parents and what they feel is best. All can be equal. I’m not saying public schools are bad, or evil, I just think if I have kids, I could give them a more positive learning experience via home school, though I may opt for a private high school or something like that just so it looks good on the college application, if my kid wants to go to an upscale university. There are many, many ways to teach someone, just like there are many, many ways to raise each kid. In the end, only the parent can decide.

Sticker, if you check out the link I posted on the first page, the blogger I read is actually saying that elite colleges are leaning towards homeschooled kids (not outright, but since they are looking for real “interests” instead of just classes taken, it helps homeschooled kids). I went to Cornell and I can’t say I met anyone who was homeschooled, but things may change over the next 10-15 years.

It is a new trend and may continue, hopefully it does, I had some issues with admissions and applications because my home school transcripts were frowned upon by the school I wanted to go to. So, I had to go to a community college they worked with for a few semesters to transfer. Which was fine, honestly, basically just had to do the GE stuff (Eng 101/102, Humanities, etc) there. But, by time I have kids who are thinking about college, I am sure every thing will have changed, we are talking at least 20 years into the future. lol So I can’t say for sure exactly what I will do then, or what will be best for a college application.