Hi, BT,
When I read about your husband bringing home this big guy (was it yesterday?) I have to admit that I got very, very concerned about your health, particularly your back. You had trouble before caring for three tiny ones, but a 12 lb. bun is much harder to care for all alone, never mind with 3 others. I think you’re crying because you know that and are overwhelmed.
Why did your husband stop at the humane shelter? If he wants this bunny, who sounds very sweet but possibly in need of increasing vet care, I would suggest that it be his responsibility totally. Feeding, cleaning, playing – the works. He also knows that Cotton fights males. You’ve been fortunate that Cotton has accepted the girls, but is this too much for both of you? (You and Cotton I mean.) Perhaps you should just foster this bun temporarily while finding it a better home.
Your heart is much bigger than your home, (So is Hubby’s) and it’s going to become a hotel for bunnies if you don’t set a limit. I know your husband adores you, but it would be more loving to let you be relaxed with only 3 little ones than to add to a menagerie. After all, he goes out of town frequently for work, leaves you to care for them, and you have no car to drive to the vet or the store for supplies. This could get very, very difficult for you.

I am so sorry if I sound harsh in any way. I just am surprised he did this. Of course he vacuumed – he should as caretaker of the bunny! It’s his. If you do keep it, maybe it will teach him how hard it is to care for a bun on a daily basis and he’ll stop impulse buying. Vacuuming is not doing you a favor – it’s his responsibility. And the solution is not to keep them locked up just so you can enjoy life. You need to all enjoy your life together daily, bunnies and people, in a home that you all do well in.
I’d hate to see a repeat of the sad time you went through earlier this year, but I feel compelled to say that I think it may be wise to consider taking this little guy back to the shelter. The other 3 have just settled into a compatible life together, and frankly, you have got to start putting yourself first. Sorry BT – I just care about you too much to not say this.

i think the vet would need to evaluate him to see if he is too big. they can tell by pressing on the sides, and they have a general knowledge of breeds and how large they are typically. it’s going to take a lot of hay, veggies and pellets for that big guy. he will probably consume more than the other 3 combined.

i’ve been thinking about this post and Pam’s reply all morning, and about whether or not i want to say anything else. i do…

1) Cotton. he does not get along well with other bunnies. he turns very aggressive towards you when confronted with the smells of other buns. and you don’t have a big place. if he could be in an area all by himself, i think things could work out, but that’s just not possible. if you could bond the new bunny to the girls and have a trio, would you ever consider giving Cotton to someone who would agree to have him as an only bunny? i know how much you love him, but i think he might be happier without other buns around. just something to think about.

2) the girls. there is no guarantee that they will continue to get along as time goes on. they will be reaching puberty within the next 2-4 months and at that point they may need to be housed separately. does your husband know that they will need to be spayed and it will fall upon you guys to make that happen? and it’s more expensive to spay than to neuter typically. they are also very high-maintenance buns in terms of grooming.

3) you are going to need at least 3, possibly 4 separate cages. do you have space for them, in addition to run-around time? i have a very small house too, so i understand that space is a very big factor! separate runtime is an inconvenience also, what with marking and fair schedules.

4) your husband does not want you to bond anymore. if you were to keep all four buns, i think your best solution would be to try your hardest to bond them into two pairs. Cotton with the girl he gets along best with, and the new bun with the other girl. but it would likely take A LOT of time and work to bond Cotton. you’d have to be dedicated to doing it everyday!

5) your health. i am so worried for your back problem, and even your emotional health. this is a lot to do, and i’m worried that it’s going to be too much for you to handle. it is very likely that you will always have marking, every single day, having so many unbonded buns around. your husband is helping out now, but you don’t know that this will continue. if the newness wears off in a week or a month or six months, and he leaves it to you, you will not have any help. you will have these four buns (if all goes well and everyone is healthy) for another 8-12 years. this is a long-term responsibility!

6) money. vet care, spaying the girls, greens, pellets, hay, litter. you are looking at a huge monetary commitment.

i really do care about you and your buns and i want what’s best for all of you! please think about these things and what Pam said too (this is really to just ditto her sentiments).