so, i got both buns fixed over a month ago. i kept them separated in separate rooms for a month so they did not see each other at all. then i even MOVED! brand new apartment. no smells of marked territory. brand new place, but i fear all that did not help.
this is the 3rd attempt to bond. first was introducing them in a pretty clearly marked territory. bringing a bun into a house that has been owned by another bun for over a year. new bun tried to establish dominance, and old bun was having none of it. we encouraged the humping, to try and get one of them to assert dominance. the new bun did it, but got rough by latching on. old bun would take it for a wile, but then would try and get away. but wile latched on, it turned into a fight, and feelings where hurt. so that was first mistake.
next time we tried putting them in the bathtub side by side and just petting both of them for 10 min and telling them they where good girls. they where relatively calm, but we still allowed the humping, which old bun did not like. it led to fights. then as time went on we tried to let them just play in the same room, and it turned into fights with chunks being torn out of each other. so i only let 1 out at a time, but when one was out, it would sit outside the others cage, and stare.
so i got them fixed. and also shampooed my rugs to get rid of all smell markers. because i was told that would help. a couple weeks after fixing, i tried reintroducing them by letting them out at the same time. immediate fight. with quarter size chunks of skin ripped off of new bun in seconds. even though there was no humping. old bun just seems to have a huge grudge. so, i separated them. no contact for a month. let the hormones get out of there system. moved. everything new. we have been moved in about 5 days, and i let old bun explore the walk in closet for about 3 min, then brought in new bun, and tried to pet them side by side, and tell them they are good girls. they did the stretch and sniff nose to nose sort of thing, like im not sure about this bun, then old bun growled and lashed out. i separated them immediately but other bun ran away and hid with someone else.
so, not off to a great start, and i took that as a bad omen that things would never get better. im seriously considering putting old bun up for adoption, which is sad because shes the cutest nicest baby ever when shes alone, but she just seems to have this huge grudge against new bun. and when comparing buns, new bun is far more cuddly than old bun. it goes looking for pets and play time, where as old bun mostly just investigates, but leaves everything alone.
so its a very hard choice. are there any more tips to try and dampen this grudge and try and work twards possibly bonding? would getting a male bun help? i dont want to get rid of my buns, but i want to put them together in this huge multi level cage im building. please help. i love them so much, but i cant keep them separate forever.