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BINKYBUNNY FORUMS > RAINBOW BRIDGE > A Place for Support, Comfort & Remembrance
Last Post by Bethany Fromm at 5/01/2016 11:10 AM (55 Replies)
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User is Offline My1&onlyMarshmellow
12 posts Send Private Message
4/30/2015 7:15 AM

I feel urges to sobb every day now since monday. I DONT want this to be the new norm. But I also I have to cry it out and don't want this to be the new norm either too. I feel like I'm a ll cried out though, my throat has been sore and the back of* my neck is sore. Yet I just sobbed and 8 crumpled tissues later I could maybe again. Im so sorry for all of our losses. Why do animals the sweetest of us all have to go sooner? I have never cried and loved over anyone in all the funerals as i have for this one. I try to not forget how it felt like when he was around cause i feel it fading away and i don't want it to dammit. I don't want to lose the feeling of his presence. he was alone in his last moments is what kills me the most. I left him, i should not have left him. I cry saying this over and over and my husband tries to help saying I didn't know, that he was going to die. I m saying that i should have been there by his side like i was before. I spent nights with 2 hours of sleep before. WHy couldn't i skip 2 dumb classes. My husband tells me to not go down this path of regret and i should not go there and that we (vet included) did the best we could. HA in hindsight i saw he was suffocating. Vet noticed he was having labored breathing and i should have made him check and demanded to find out whats happing with his lungs. Well when the biopsy was done the cancer spread to his lungs. he was dying and it flew right over all of our heads. (ssmh)Dying in front of me and dead after i left. I um wondering how he suffered. Vet said little to none with the pain killer shot (for what we thought was G.I. Stasis) which i have to ask if he saw the g.i. stasis in his tummy when he was doing the autotopsy. I know rabbits get cancer cause they are old and not meant to live so long….maybe he was older than i though and he was 10-12? when i think he was only 9? idc though. At the vet he ugh always is ready to get out his carrier and fight (he was strong my lil ❤ trooper) he just layer half way in and out and wished i took a video or picture. his paws hanging off the edge and his d. brown flat face and brown ears -so adorable.  He didn't have energy to get out of his carrier meant he was ready to be put down. I didn't think he was ready but i see how he was..im so sorry my little angel my sweet sweet rabbit butt is gone. I miss holding rabbit butt, kissing his rabbit butt. I can't talk like that anywhere except here and to my hubby. Everyone else would look at me crazy. He look like a little bear cub. Pain can't hurt you now budee, pain cannot hurt you now. But oh would i love to just kiss your cheeks and nuzzle you and kiss your face. tears



User is Offline LongEaredLions
I <3 REWs!
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5/01/2015 4:13 PM
Gosh guys, I cannot read one post here without there being tears.
My1&onlyMarshmallow, I am so very sorry. The guilt, the grief, it is all very normal, but I do hope you will focus on the long happy life together. None of this is your fault, you did everything you could but sometimes it is all you can do to have loved them for as long as you did. Sending all my love to you, I unfortunately know how you are feeling right now.
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User is Offline My1&onlyMarshmellow
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5/03/2015 12:01 PM

I re read my last post too and tears have formed. I have since calmed down more. My husband has been by my side and just loving on me and holding me more. I don't have the urge to cry as much. which makes me mad because i should be.

Just very depressed about it. so quiet with out him digging and drinking his water and knocking his food bowl over even though its a  heavy porcelain bowl that weighs like 50 pounds. 

Im so sad. I have a lot of good moments though because of my hubby. He cheers me up and took us out to eat and long walks and ice-cream. He understands a lot. 

Have candles lit as much as possible. His pen has been empty since Monday. I am not ready to remove it although i'd love to have the room cleaned up and the table moved in there for it to be my study room. I can't clean it with it there but i don't want it to leave so i put myself in this tough spot of cleaning/not cleaning it out. I feel like his spirit is around. he was in there just over week ago-oh sigh not now though. arg i just get very sad now. 

Its finals week, I'm leaving for a hiking trip through our college for 2 weeks so theres no time to fully heal. somehow learning about the navajos in Arizona and hiking will restore peace within me. In the mean time i have a stuffed animal(white polar bear) thats soft and furry and the closest feel i have to marshmallow to carry and squeeze.

thank you for all the kind words. They are very kind words. Yesterday I laughed a lot being at work some coworkers understand the loss of a close pet. i was able to get a hug.

My husband is funny and cheered me up a lot. But no matter how much i have been laughing in my head and in my heart i feel a painful void. 


User is Offline Charlies Angel
15 Hay Lane, Bunny Town, Buns ville
1021 posts Send Private Message
5/16/2015 11:02 PM

For all those bunnies who have died and other animals and those who left us too soon.



Heavenly Father, Creator of all things, thank you for having entrusted us with a loyal pet. Thank you for letting him teach us unselfish love. Thank you for the memories that we can recall to brighten our days for the rest of our lives. Finally, in gratitude, we return our pet to you. Amen.


I love Bunnies.

User is Offline LongEaredLions
I <3 REWs!
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5/21/2015 9:59 PM
Lovely, Pinky. :,)
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User is Offline Charlies Angel
15 Hay Lane, Bunny Town, Buns ville
1021 posts Send Private Message
5/27/2015 2:04 PM
Why do I cry when I hear a bunny has died on here?
I love Bunnies.

User is Offline LongEaredLions
I <3 REWs!
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5/30/2015 9:59 PM
I think a lot of people experience that, Pinky. Even with bunnies we hadn't known for long or at all, the thought of a precious creature's death can bring us to tears, especially when we know the joy our own bunnies bring to us. :'(
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User is Offline My1&onlyMarshmellow
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6/02/2015 7:32 AM

Thank you for your prayers Pinky Thank you. Hungs to you and LongEaredLions. I went away to volunteer on a navajo reservation and it helped and I thought I was getting better. But today is hard. All it takes is to look at some of the photos I have i could lose it any moment. Some of you unfortunately know the feeling. When I returned, though, his remains (from the crematory) were sitting there waiting for me in a beautiful cherry wood finish box w/ his name plate on top as soon as I held it (a couple of weeks ago) I lost it like the day he left. Hubby and I had together thrown his semi-new still pen away and donated the gates to it. We still have his original 2 level cage he had most his life where he had an option to hop in and out and upstairs to eat n drink and hop down to stretch out and feel safe versus being locked up all day (inhumane).  Had that cage for his whole life till may this year when he couldn't hop up to the second level to eat. he then couldn't even hop into anymore so we got a guinea pig area pen from amazon (2 of them-and infuse the tarps) together for a wider area for him to have for his own. Still, still, still.so.surreal. I miss him. A lot. I def. feel greedy/guilty for wanting him more than even all the years I did get to have and I still didn't feel it was enough time. R.i.p buddee and fellow amimals sweet amimamamals. I def. feel that void. And I def. now relate to how a pet can be like a child of ones own when I used to smirk at the thought-it hurts now. It was def. a blessing to have lived through that journey and would not give it back ever. Who knows where our pets could have landed and who knows their second option would have been-abuse neglect, God only knows but we loved them with unconditional love and nurtured them till there hearts content and they gave us there unconditional love and forgave us on spot when we made a mistake and taught us to do the same for others. Taught me to sometimes not be so picky and pristine about grooming but just take time to enjoy their presence. I hovered over him a lot and picked at his matted fur around his weepy eye so much that he just wanted me to pet him-as if he knew his eyes were a never ending job and moved his cute lil head away when enough was enough. But love, he knew love and sweet pettings were more awesome and powerful. So he patiently waited and gave his head for warm touches and pettings from my hand. And when I did he was happy. Phew I feel a little better now, talking about it.

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User is Offline Charlies Angel
15 Hay Lane, Bunny Town, Buns ville
1021 posts Send Private Message
6/13/2015 11:45 AM

This is St. Francis, Francis saw animals as his brothers and sisters because they were God’s creatures, just like people. He said of animals. “Not to hurt our humble brethren is our first duty to them, but to stop there is not enough. We have a higher mission to be of service to them wherever they require it.” So Francis prayed that God would work through him to help animals as well as people.

I am not very religious, but I think when we lose a pet God sends them to St. Francis and imagine some nice woodland and Francis standing there waiting to open a gate into a beautiful woodland garden to join others, this may bring some comfort to people who have lost a pet, someone to care for them forever.

Maybe this is at the end of The Rainbow Bridge that they see.

I love Bunnies.

User is Offline angelonia
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10/07/2015 11:32 PM
I am a new member here, but I was really feeling the need to talk about my bunny Jesse, who passed away this morning. At this point my husband and I are both really heartbroken, but I am also feeling unbearable guilt. We've adopted four bunnies over the last few years, and now three of them have died too soon. It's hard not to feel like a terrible bunny parent, and I'm unsure I would ever be able to adopt a rabbit again. But, part of me thinks that if bunny people who know about these things could reassure me that we didn't do anything wrong, it might help.

Our first bunnies were both rescues with teeth issues who had never learned to eat hay, so of course I knew they would have many health challenges. But the way the second one died was really heart-breaking - she had been in for a dental surgery, and when she wasn't bouncing back the next day, I took her back to the vet (a rabbit specialist). The vet prescribed newer, stronger antibiotics to fight off an infection. They should have been safe to give orally, but Ume died within an hour of the first dose. She went downhill so quickly and died in my husband's lap while we both stroked her. She cried out in pain before the light went out of her eyes. I will never forget that terrible moment.

In time we adopted another bonded pair, a sweet two year old Polish girl and a truly adorable young Flemish boy. We named them Mina and Jesse (together, 'Jessamina', an old name of the Jasmine flower). Jesse was the Flemish who just died. He was the most wonderful bunny, with love for everyone, endless binkies, and a fantastic appetite.

On Saturday, which was also my birthday, we noticed that Jesse's usual lusty appetite had slowed, so we canceled our plans and took him to a highly recommended bunny vet. She did scans and found gas but no blockage, so she hypothesized that he was just having some GI slow-down due to the change of seasons and perhaps grooming Mina a little too much. She gave us gut motility drugs and painkillers and sent us home. We live out in the country, so the journey to a good bunny vet is a long one, and the car ride seemed stressful for Jesse. His temp at the vet was quite high, but it was normal at home.

On Sunday we noticed that one of his cheeks had swollen alarmingly. It looked like an abscess and we were very concerned that this might be the underlying cause of his appetite loss. The vet was closed that day, but we called their off-hours line and made an appointment for the next day. Jesse was eating pretty well on his own (critical care, salads, pellets, everything but hay, which seemed too painful), pooping, even doing little binkies. His temp was normal. On Monday we took him in and the vet discovered that the cause of the abscess might be a broken tooth, which she pulled. She also lanced, drained, and flushed the abscess.

We went home with new meds, but Jesse never really seemed right after that. We got home around 6 pm and syringe fed him critical care. The next morning he had not pooped and was only very slowly nibbling on a few leaves. His temp was also at 104.2, so we took him to the emergency exotics hospital. He was admitted with a high fever and stayed there the rest of the day and through the night. They were able to stabilize his temperature, but all kinds of other vitals were crashing- glucose levels, blood pH, calcium, etc. The vet performed every intervention they could think of. Around 1:00 a.m. they told me all his levels had gone up a bit, and they were hopeful. They placed him on oxygen and IVs overnight. But when the tech came in that morning, our dear boy had passed. The vet told me that it looked like an incredibly nasty infection; she compared it to flesh-eating bacteria in humans.

Given all that, it's likely there's nothing anyone could have done, but I still feel just heartbroken and like I should have noticed sooner, should have done something differently that would have allowed him to live. He was practically still a baby, not even two years old. I keep crying and even hyperventilating, just wanting to tell him how sorry I am.

Part of the guilt comes from the fact that I just started back at university after a long absence, and I hadn't been around nearly as much last week. We also have three dogs and two cats, so there are always many little souls to look after. My husband often takes care of the day to day bunny care, and though he loves them very much, I wonder if I might have noticed something sooner. For our remaining bunny Mina I am determined to do everything I can to be a better mom. I will clean out her litter box every day so I always know exactly how much she is pooping, and I have also set up an appointment with a mobile vet so that she can get care without having to endure the stress of car rides. (She is still eating/pooping very well, but I'd like to have a baseline with the vet and just get everything checked.) But none of that brings Jesse back.

Our bunnies have always had a huge pen and lots of clean fresh hay to eat, daily playtime, and love and affection (both from us and from their canine friend/protector, a gentle Great Pyr). Jesse always seemed like a very happy bunny, but I can't stop feeling so very guilty and sad. I should have kept better track of his stools, I should have taken him to the emergency vet as soon as I saw the abscess... I am sure it happens to many people who lose a beloved pet, but with one so young and healthy just a few days ago, it is that much harder.

User is Offline LongEaredLions
I <3 REWs!
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11/20/2015 9:18 PM
Angelonia, I am so sorry for your loss of Jesse, and the bunnies before him. Reading your post, I cannot find anything that in any way suggests that you should feel guilty. I would have done everything the same, you did everything you could and more. After the loss of bunnies, it is so easy to focus on what you could have done, but instead try to think of the wonderful life you gave Jesse. ((((hugs))))
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User is Offline Charlies Angel
15 Hay Lane, Bunny Town, Buns ville
1021 posts Send Private Message
12/24/2015 12:56 PM
Just to let you all know, a special candle was lit tonight in my home, for all the bunnies that have passed away, we are thinking of you.

From Pinky and Olly.
I love Bunnies.

User is Offline Charlies Angel
15 Hay Lane, Bunny Town, Buns ville
1021 posts Send Private Message
1/13/2016 2:06 AM
Here is a beautiful special song for everyone who has lost a bunny or any other fluffy friend.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RFc5sdn78b0
I love Bunnies.

User is Offline Charlies Angel
15 Hay Lane, Bunny Town, Buns ville
1021 posts Send Private Message
1/13/2016 2:08 AM
If the song I posted is not available in your country, let me know and I will see if I can find another link.
I love Bunnies.

User is Offline Charlies Angel
15 Hay Lane, Bunny Town, Buns ville
1021 posts Send Private Message
2/17/2016 8:25 AM
I see everyday another Bunny has gone to the Rainbow Bridge, sometimes me and Olly can reply to if we are not busy, sometimes we don't have time to reply,just to let you know we haven't forgotten anyone or any Bunny.
I love Bunnies.

User is Offline Bethany Fromm
1 posts Send Private Message
5/01/2016 11:10 AM
This made me cry. You're an amazing writer and that was an amazing poem. I related to it a lot.
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