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Forum BONDING Stress bonding question

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    • Sindri
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        I had started to bond my 2 rabbits Usagi and Kilala in late November but after 4 sessions that didn’t go well I decided to take a break. Both are neutered and spayed. Usagi is almost 1 and Kilala is 7 months. Usagi has been extremely aggressive towards Kilala. The past times I tried bonding he would always attack or try to attack and it always led to fur flying and I had to end the sessions well except one when Kilala jumoed out of the bathtub. I started trying to bond them last night in our main bathroom and the first thing Usagi did was jump on Kilala and start ripping fur out. I was frustrated and I ended the session quickly. So tonight I put them in a box walked them around and periodically would drag the box across the tile in the kitchen. I then put the box in a baby stroller and wheeled them around the house stopping from time to time and pet them. This went on for over 20 minutes. The last 5 minutes or so I just set the box down and watched and petted them off and on. Usagi never attacked Kilala once and in fact cuddled really close to her. He seemed to put his head down for grooming but Kiala wouldn’t move. This worked really well considering my other bonding sessions and I was curious if this would be bad to do again tomorrow or often? I was thinking of starting off like I did and if things were going well I was planning on letting them visit in the main bathroom.  I have had Kilala since August and she was spayed  November 3rd and I would really love to see these two bonded. Any advice would be GREATLY appreciated!


      • MoveDiagonally
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          I’m glad you saw some improvement in your bunnies together! Stress bonding is great for aggressive bunny bonding situations. It can help them see each other as a source of comfort instead of an enemy and it sounds like you did great.

          I think starting off this way tomorrow and trying a normal session afterwards is fine. I’ve always done this without an issue but some people do have issues with rabbits in normal sessions right after stress bonding “taking out” the stress on each other. It’s something to keep an eye out for. If your bunnies start fighting in a normal session I would return them to a stress bonding situation before ending the session. You want to avoid ending on bad notes or with fights because it can encourage them to fight even more.

          Keep us posted!


        • Sindri
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            Thank you. I was going to do exactly as you wrote if Usagi starts being mean I will put them back in the box and end on a good note. I was really proud of him yesterday. He was definitely looking for comfort from Kilala but she was so scared she barely would move. I will give it another try today and see how it goes. Thanks again for your input!


          • Sindri
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              I just got done with tonight’s bonding. It started with Usagi attacking kilala but that ended quickly. I walked them about for awhile then they had bathtub time. I am finding that Usagi attacks Kilala when she starts to relax and move around. She never goes near him or tries to interact at all. This happened 3 times. The session lasted around 40 minutes this time most in the box. I put them back in. Usagi groomed Kilala and himself. I was happy to see that and when I was about to end the session he then attacked her because she moved. So I had to walk them around some more. I put the box down and petted them off and on and I noticed Usagi do something that might mean he was being possessive of Kilala? He grunted/growled at me once when I tried to pet her and then once he lunged at me when I was going to pet her. He definitely is confusing me. So I guess I have to  continue with more stress bonding…


            • Sindri
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                Well I didn’t do any bonding the other day due to the fact that now Usagi seems scared of me at times when I approach him. I guess he thinks I am going to pick him up which he hates. I have noticed he has been acting different to me since this since I started the bonding process again. I am not sure what to do next. If anyone has any ideas please let me know. I could really use some help.


              • Alfiebuns
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                  Hi,

                  I’m currently trying to bond 5 bunnies, 2pairs and 1 single who mixes with one of the girls in the pair.

                  Ted is our troublesome bun, he does exactly what you described Usagi as doing. He always starts the trouble, attacks, growls, bites and then hates us hoomins for putting him in the situation so runs away from us and stomps. It has got to the point where we started to worry he would never trust us again so instead of full on bonding we’ve decided to just bond with barriers for a good few weeks. We bought a trellis and put it up between the buns bedrooms so they see each other at all times. Ted still goes mental at the trellis but he has defo warmed to us hoomins again so that may work for you?


                • MoveDiagonally
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                    Sorry I didn’t see with earlier Sindriona!

                    To both you and Alfiebuns – You’re bunnies WILL forgive you. I wasn’t the most popular person during bonding either but they get over it afterwards.


                  • Sindri
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                      Hehe Yea Usagi is still holding a grudge towards me. He is such a rascal. I am going to try another session this weekend if I get the same results I have been getting. I am going to take a break for 2 months. Usagi began to get extremely scared of me running and hiding making all kinds of sad little sounds. Kilala was being attacked every time she moved so she couldn’t interact back with Usagi. I felt stuck like there wasn’t progress being made. I thought a good 2 months off without seeing or smelling each other might break them out of the attack/fear cycle. I have taken a 3 week break but not a 2 month break.
                      Alfiebuns the trellis idea is very interesting. I look forward to reading how that goes. I may have to try something like that myself. I kind of tried something like that with a window screen but Usagi chewed threw it fast. hehe


                    • Sindri
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                        Oh and thanks guys for the replies and the info. I really appreciate it!


                      • tanlover14
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                          Don’t take the “grudge” personally. They aren’t actually scared of you – they’re trying to get away from you because they know you’re going to put them in with that “horrible other bunny”. It IS stressful for them which is why they can be so cautious around while bonding. BUT the stress can also work in your favor. So don’t be quick to stop because one seems more skittish than usual. My buns all KNEW when I was coming to bond – and believe me – they all ran in about five different directions. I promise you they DO get over it.

                          Also, something we tried to do while bonding. Is give them lots of attention outside of the bonding. So they don’t necessarily associate every encounter with you to be about bonding. We would give treats after bonding to help encourage them to come up and be their normal selves again.


                        • Sindri
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                            Usagi has gone from being scared of me getting him (He HATES being picked up) to just kind of ignoring me. I can give him love but I have to approach him now. Kilala is an easy going girl she isn’t upset or mad. The main thing that is bothering me about this bonding process is feeling stuck with the same result of Usagi attacking Kilala and her being scared and not fighting back but either running away which she cant do of course or she sit frozen and doesn’t interact with Usagi. I break up fights quickly and then she sits frozen until she decides its safe to move and then the attacks begins again.

                            So that’s when I think I should take a break. I don’t know I kind of want to keep trying. I think I will  try once more today and then see about a break.


                          • tanlover14
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                              Are you still trying in the box?


                            • Zombie-Sue
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                                I tooooooold you that stress bonding is the best way to go. I toooold you.


                              • Sindri
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                                  Zombie-Sue you made me laugh. hehe
                                  Tanlover14 I had been using a box. I wasn’t sure if that is what I was going to stay with. Should I still use the box? I was going to use a spray bottle this time when Usagi attacks this time. I had to go out and buy a water bottle I was using a strainer and a vacuum before to break up fights. Of course the vacuum didn’t scare Usagi.


                                • Zombie-Sue
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                                    If you haven’t had success I think a change of scenery might be a good idea if you’re able.


                                  • Sindri
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                                       Tonight’s bonding  session went the worst ever. I found out the water bottle doesn’t work. I decided to put up my expen in the kitchen and do a session in there. I made it small but I guess I should have stuck with the box. So I guess I should take a break. 


                                    • tanlover14
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                                        I don’t think you should take a break unless you really think it’s stressful for yourself and causing yourself anxiety and YOU need a break – that case take a break because I understand how stressful and frustrating it can be.

                                        I would go back to the box though. The key is finding a bonding strategy that can encourage interaction with limited fighting. And I think that’s what the box was allowing. Sometimes you have to “cement” the bond in one area before you move onto the next area or it kind of falls too pieces and you have to go backwards to whatever you were doing before that had positive results.


                                      • Sindri
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                                          I think you are right the box worked the best thus far. I will definitely go back to that. It was also easier to break up fights that way. I would also like to take them for a drive. I need to convince my hubby to drive me while I keep an eye on the buns. They both don’t like car rides. After tonight’s bonding session Usagi wasn’t mad at me or scared of me he wanted lots of pets. Kilala just wanted to be left alone. They had quite the scuffle.


                                        • Sindri
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                                            I was wondering when I go back to bonding in the box should I have short sessions and how often?


                                          • tanlover14
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                                              I would see how the first session back goes and decide based on that – sometimes my rabbits create quite the fuss in the beginnning but then are fine the whole rest of the session and other times when I’m adding a new one it’s just constant nipping and scuffling.

                                              Plan to keep the first one short and just see what happens (that’s what I would do!).


                                            • Sindri
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                                                Thank you for answering my question! Back to be box it is then. hehe


                                              • Zombie-Sue
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                                                  And be firm with your husband!

                                                  Sometimes husbands need a good yelling at. LOL, free marital advice from me.


                                                • Sindri
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                                                    LOL I think I am gonna get him to cave in and take the rabbits for a ride this weekend. He hates trying to catch the rabbits for bonding. He gave up when Usagi almost bit him. He was trying to pick him up from inside his cage. I told him I wouldn’t do that if I were you he is going to try and bite you. hehe


                                                  • Sindri
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                                                      Alfiebuns do you happen to have a picture of your trellis set up? It sounds interesting to me.


                                                    • Sindri
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                                                        I am back to  bonding my rabbits. I have been for a few days now. I have mostly the same results as before. I made a new bonding box since I had a cardboard one and Usagi peed in last night. Kilala did a bit more moving around this time but never interacting with Usagi. There were several times where Usagi pulled fur out and attacked. He also did some grooming to Kilala and It seemed a bit aggressive looking. Sometimes he nibbled on her. He layed over her once.

                                                        I am wondering if maybe I should increase the number of sessions a day to switch things up? I do keep the sessions a bit long since it seems Usagi calms down as I go on plus since I put in effort gathering them up I might as well make the most of it. I do around an hour. So what I wonder is should I double my sessions a day or increase my time? I made this last box a bit bigger than what I had before so I do want to stick to the box still for awhile. Any ideas would be great.

                                                        Oh here is a pic of my cat Puss who decided to help a little during bonding. He went over to the bunnies and meowed at them and sat there for awhile.


                                                      • Sindri
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                                                            After reading Alfiebun’s trellis idea I decided to get a gate so my rabbits could visit each other during their turns free ranging in the evenings. I searched  Amazon and found one that they can see each other through but no one can bite. Its made out of some kind of plastic material. Its working out well. Usagi did try to bite Kiala once and realized it wasn’t going to work. Now they check each other out and its funny because Usagi will get real excited and do binkies around his room. So does kilala. This morning they would look at each other and then run around their rooms and then go back to looking at each other. I take turns putting in each other’s doorways. I will do this in addition to the bonding sessions.
                                                          Here is a picture its hard to get a good one with 2 rabbits that are constantly moving.


                                                        • Zombie-Sue
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                                                            If you notice they do better the longer they’re together, definitely do longer sessions. I think that’s a common experience.


                                                          • Sindri
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                                                              I unfortunately haven’t had any bonding sessions the past few days just short visits threw the gate in the hallway. We have had a lot going on. As it stands things seem to be about the same. Yesterday the rabbits were acting really spun up I even got bit by Usagi. I decided just to let them have their free range time without the gate up after that and Kilala would keep going to Usagi’s door. She would thump and make honking sounds not sure what that means? I plan to do a session later today. Oh and yeah I like doing longer sessions since it seems most of the fights are in the beginning with short little ones when I leave them sit for awhile. It looks like this is going to take awhile. When I get some free time where I have a few hours I want to set up an area where I can have a couple of hours or more together. Thanks for the support I am such a newbie when it comes to bonding. =)


                                                            • CooperLop
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                                                                My breakthrough was going from 30min or 1 hour sessions to 4 hours at once. I sat next to the tub with my ipad and Netflix and just ignored them unless I heard a fight break out.


                                                              • Sindri
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                                                                  That’s exactly what I would like to do is a long bonding session. Right now mine have been around an hour to an hour and a half. I need to try something different because right now things are pretty much the same with the exception of my female does seem to be getting more comfortable which is good. Usagi is still his old self with his attacking then not attacking to grooming then attacking. I bet Kilala is thinking “what the heck is going on with this guy”. hehe Apparently it doesn’t seem to bother her too much because when she gets her time out of the bunny room where she has access to the whole living area she spends 95% of the time of it trying to visit Usagi threw the see threw gate.
                                                                  Thanks for your info CooperLop I should have some time like that on Sunday. I am going to give it a try but in a smaller space since the box I just built is what working for me right now. Its a bit bigger than the last box I had. They fought horribly the last time I tried putting them in a space that was a bit bigger.


                                                                • Sindri
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                                                                    I just thought of something. I guess if I bond them for a long period of time my small box wouldn’t be a good idea being they need to use a litter box and eat? maybe they should have a litter box. Say I use an xpen or a tub should I use 1 littler box or 2? I don’t want to create a territorial fight over litter boxes. Or perhaps should I get a totally new one that neither has used before? I haven’t bonded for longer than an hour and a half I was just wondering what I should do? I definitely need to do more long sessions and get these two bonded we need our guest room back for incoming guest next month.


                                                                  • Sindri
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                                                                      I tried to have my big bonding session today. I was planning for 3 to 4 hours but it didn’t last longer than 2 hours. I first started in my box and then put them in a small area with litter boxes and water. They fought too many times to count in that space. Kilala did fight back this time instead of the usual running away. I had to go back to the box and it was nice outside so I took them outside and walked them around. Its just the same results except worse now that Kilala I fighting back and even did some attacking herself. I am done bonding for now unless anyone else has anymore ideas. I am at this moment fed up. I am not upset I just think its not going to work at this point and I am not certain even a break will help. So what it is worth I want to say thanks for those that did offer some advice and help it was very much appreciated.


                                                                    • Zombie-Sue
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                                                                        Take a longer break, last time you only waited a couple days. I’d say wait like a whole month and give it another go.


                                                                      • Sindri
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                                                                          If I do decide to try bonding again I will probably take a couple of months off. They need a really long break. Thanks again for your help. =)

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                                                                      Forum BONDING Stress bonding question